Open Your Eyes
by twenty3
Summary: Nick just finds out about a son that's been alive for eight years. A story about Nick and Alex Stokes and how their relationship grows over the years as Nick takes on the challenge of parenting.
1. Chapter 1

I don't own anything, except for the characters I make up. This first chapter may seem like it's moving really fast, but I promise it'll slow down. Hope you enjoy.

* * *

Nick Stokes stared up at the under-carriage of the car above him. He shined his flashlight everywhere he could as he looked for the fibers that Grissom had promised would be under here. But Nick was having no such looking finding said fibers. He sighed in frustration and kept on looking.

"What's the matter?" Warrick asked from somewhere above.

"Grissom lies." Nick said simply. He rolled out from under the old Mustang and got to his feet. "There's nothing under there but grease and oil. Why did he even think there would be anything down there in the first place?"

Warrick shrugged. "How should I know?" He walked past Nick and patted him on the shoulder. "I'm going to go get some coffee and take a break. You should consider doing the same."

"Good idea." Nick agreed. He peeled off his work gloves and dropped them on the bench before turning to follow Warrick. He stopped, however, when he heard his name echo over the loud speaker.

"Nick Stokes, you have a...visitor." Judy said from the front desk. Her voice suggested that she was somewhat confused and mildly amused. Warrick turned back and looked at Nick, who shrugged.

"I have no idea who it is." He said with a sigh. "This better be good to interfere with me taking a break.

Nick had no idea.

He walked through the halls of the crime lab until he got to the front desk and walked up to Judy. She simply pointed off to her left. Nick followed her finger with his eyes until they landed on a little kid sitting in one of the chairs up against the wall. The kid had dark hair, brown eyes and tanned skin. He was looking at everything around him, but finally noiced Nick had come into the room. He smiled shyly when he saw him.

If Nick had been holding anything, he would have dropped it at the sight of the kid that looked exactly like him. Except much, much younger. He slowly walked over to the little boy, who was still smiling at him. He came to a stop in front of him before crouching down so he was at eye level with his little clone.

"Hi." The little kid said cheerfully.

"Hi." Nick said, still in shock. "How did you get here buddy?" He asked.

"I took a cab."

Nick was surprised at that answer. "How old are you?"

The little kid held up both of his hands, five fingers up on one of them and three on the other. "I just turned eight last month. My name's Alex."

Nick nodded slowly. "Okay, Alex...why did you take a cab here?"

"My mommy told me to." He said, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"Who's your mom?" Nick asked.

"Her name's Stephanie Jacobs. She lived in Texas with me. But she didn't want me anymore because she said I was a pain in the ass and told me to come live with you because nobody else would want me."

Realization dawned on Nick as he figured out what was going on. "Holy sh-...oh man." He said. He ran his greasy hands through his dark hair, trying to think clearly.

"Why are you all dirty? You look like my mom's boyfriend when he gets home from work. He's a mechanic. I think." Alex said.

"I was looking for something on a car...but that's not important right now." Nick stood up and looked around, trying to think of what to do. "Come with me buddy." He said.

Alex jumped down from the chair and walked next to Nick down the halls. Everyone that saw them stopped what they were doing and stared at the sight before them. It wasn't everyday you got to see Nick Stokes walking around the crime lab with what had to be his son by the looks of it.

"Why is everyone staring at me?" Alex asked. He stopped in front of one of the labs and made a face at the tech inside. Hodges returned the gesture before going back to his work.

"Don't worry about them." Nick said, rolling his eyes at Hodges.

He lead Alex down a couple more hallways before they finally made it to the break room, occupied by Warrick and Catherine sitting at the table.Nick held the door open, and Alex walked inside with a smile on his face. He waved to Warrick and Catherine, who stared back open mouthed in shock. Nick followed and stood behind Alex with his hair a mess from running his hands through it so many times.

"Woah." Was all Warrick could say.

Catherine nodded in agreement. "Nick...who's this?" She asked.

Before Nick could respond, Alex reached into the pocket of his light blue jean shorts and pulled out a folded piece of paper. He turned around a held it up for Nick to take from him.

"Sorry, I forgot to give it to you before. It's from my mommy. She said to give it to you if I ever made it here." Alex said.

Nick took the paper and opened it. He read it quickly before sighing heavily and going over to sit down next to Warrick at the table. Alex followed, standing next to Nick and still smiling.

"This is Alex." Nick said, answering Catherine's question.

Alex waved again. "Hi." He said.

Warrick looked from Alex to Nick several times. "Why does he look like you?"

Nick sighed again. "Because he's my son." He said.

Warrick laughed, hoping that Nick was kidding. "Come on man...he can't be your son."

"Yes he can. He is." Nick looked down at Alex, who's smile faded a little.

"I know why." The eight-year-old said. "My mommy told me. She said that you met her at your brother's wedding and you guys slept in the same room then you left and she was by herself with me and then said it was your turn cuz she had enough of me."

Nick nodded in agreement with Alex's story. "Yeah, that's more or less what happened. When Colin got married...I went down to Texas for it and met Steph there and then...you get the idea. The note just told me where to get the papers from and everything. She wants nothing to do with him anymore."

Catherine, as well as Warrick, was having a hard time making sense of everything that just happened in a short amount of time. "You're gonna take him?" She asked, forgetting Alex was standing right there.

Alex answered for Nick. "You don't have to." He said, his smile completely gone. "My mommy said you wouldn't anyways. I'll be okay by myself though." He tried to walk away, but Nick reached out and grabbed him by his navy blue t-shirt and gently pulled him back to his previous spot.

Nick looked around at his friends, who were just as dumbfounded as he was. "I have to. I can't just send him back."

"I don't wanna go on a plane by myself again." Alex said with fear in his voice.

Nick turned to the little kid. "Your mom sent you up here on a plane, by yourself, and told you to find me?" Alex nodded. "And you did that all by yourself?"

"Yeah. It was easy. She told me you were a crime cop, so I had the taxi guy bring me here. He didn't even make me pay. He was really nice."

Nick shook his head slowly. "How could she just send him off by himself? He's only eight."

No one had an answer for that, so the room fell silent. Nick thought about what he should do, coming to the same conclusion everytime. He didn't care how crazy it sounded. He knew it was the right thing to do and that he had to do it.

"I don't have to go back, do I?" Alex asked, breaking the silence.

"Do you want to?" Nick asked him.

Alex shook his head. "No. Don't make. Please. I promise I'll be good. I won't do anything wrong I swear."

"You can stay here with me." Nick said. He saw Catherine and Warrick's shocked expressions out of the corner of his eye. He turned to them, saying, "I have no other choice guys. I can't leave him in a foster home. What if nobody takes him? I gotta do the right thing."

Catherine reached out and rested her hand on Nick's arm. "Just...think about it for a couple days before you make anything final, okay? It's a big decision."

Nick nodded. "I will. I gotta figure out how I'm gonna work everything out."

Alex hadn't been paying much attention to what was going on. His smile was back, and he looked up at Nick. His smile widened. "You look a lot like me ya know."

Nick smiled back at Alex and nodded in agreement. He looked down at the young kid and just knew that he had a responsibility to him that he had to accept. He had a new responsibility to Alex.

To his son.


	2. Chapter 2

Nick's head was spinning as he drove back to his house with Alex in the passenger seat next to him. Alex was looking out his window at the strip, the colors of all the lights dancing around in his brown eyes. Every time Nick glanced over at him, he couldn't help but smile. He didn't know why, but the thought of having a kid didn't scare him. He still realized he had to think about it a lot, although there was little doubt in his mind that Alex would be staying in Las Vegas with him. 

"Are you my dad?" Alex asked, cutting the silence.

Nick looked over at him, their brown eyes meeting. "Yeah, I am."

Alex nodded and smiled. "Good. I didn't like my other dads." He said.

"How many did you have?" Nick asked.

"I dunno." Alex shrugged. "Like four. They were all okay I guess. Except Mark. I really don't like him."

Nick picked up on the fear in Alex's voice. "Why? Did he hurt you?"

Alex quickly looked away and shook his head. "No. He was just mean. But so was my mom, so I got used to it."

Before Nick could ask anymore questions, Alex's eyes widened at the sight before him as they pulled into Nick's driveway of his home.

"This is where you live?" Alex asked.

"Yeah. You like it?"

"It's huuuuge. My old house was like...barely half this size. Why is it so big? Do you have more kids?" Alex didn't take his eyes off the white house as he got out of the car and started walking up to the front door next to his dad.

Nick shook his head. "Nope. I have a dog though."

Alex tore his eyes away from the house and looked up at Nick. "Really? I love dogs. My mom wouldn't let me have one though."

Nick opened the front door, letting them both inside. "Well, you do now. Maverick's around here somewhere..." Nick said, looking around for his yellow lab.

"His name's Maverick? That's cool." Alex said approvingly.

Out of nowhere, Maverick came bouding into the room. When he saw Alex, he wagged his tail furiously and ran up to him as fast as he could. When he reached the young kid, he started licking his face. Alex laughed and petted the lab's soft head. When Nick came back into the room, Maverick turned around and ran to him, jumping up and resting his paws on Nick's chest.

"I missed you too Mav." He said and stepped back so the lab went back down on all fours. Nick looked over at Alex, who was wiping his face with his t-shirt to get the dog slobber off of him. He smiled as he asked, "Are you hungry?"

Alex dropped his shirt so it once again hung over his shorts. "Yeah. I haven't eaten since I left. Got anything good to eat?"

Nick thought for a second before remembering the last time he went to the store. That was a few days ago. "Actually, no I don't. But that's why they invented take-out. You like pizza, right?" Alex nodded with a big smile. "Good. I'll order one."

Nick turned to walk into the kitchen to get the phone and was halfway there when he noticed Alex hadn't moved since he had walked into the house. Nick turned back around and motioned to the couch. "You can sit down buddy. Turn the TV on if you want."

Alex accepted the invitation and hopped up on the leather couch and flipped the TV on with the remote he found in between the cushions. Nick could hear the channels changing from the kitchen. He was somewhat surprised when he heard familiar sound of the basketball game come on and stay. He quickly ordered the pizza and some soda before returning to the living room and sitting down next to Alex.

"You like basketball too?"

Alex nodded. "Yeah. It's my favorite sport."

"Who's your favorite team?"

"The Spurs. I bet you like the Mavericks because you named your dog after them."

Hearing his name be said caused the yellow lab to get up from his spot on the floor and walk over to the couch. He jumped up and made himseld comfortable in between Nick and Alex before resting his head in Nick's lap and slowly closing his tired eyes.

"Yeah, you're right. You're a smart kid Alex."

"They moved me up a grade in school because I was bored with all the other kids."

"Really?" Nick was impressed with that.

"Yepp. They're all nine and I'm only eight."

"That's cool. So what did you get for your birthday last month?" Nick asked.

Alex looked over at his dad and frowned slightly in confusion. "What do you mean?"

"Your birthday was last month wasn't it?"

Alex nodded. "Yeah. April 23rd."

"What did you get for presents?"

Alex shrugged. "Nothing. I never get anything for my birthday. Why? Do you?"

Nick was in shock with that response. How could a kid not know that you were supposed to get presents on your birthday? Given the way he knew Alex had been treated, he doubted he ever got much of anything. And that made Nick mad and sad at the same time.

"Yeah, I get stuff on my birthday."

"From who?"

"A lot of people I guess. My parents and siblings...Warrick and Catherine..."

"Those are the people I met today right?"

"Yeah. I work with them."

"They were nice. Are you friends with them too or no?" Alex asked.

Nick nodded. "Yeah. Warrick's my best friend and I'm good friends with Catherine too."

"Why didn't they want me to live with you?"

"It's not like that. They just wanna make sure I make the right decision so I don't end up screwing anything up. I tend to do that a lot. But it has nothing to do with you. Don't worry, everything's gonna be fine. I promise."

Alex didn't look like he really bought what Nick was telling him. Nick didn't blame him though. From the way it sounded, Alex didn't exactly have the best home life before he came here. Nick wanted to change all that and try to help him. He knew it was going to be the hardest thing he's ever done, but it was worth a shot.

"Seeing as how you obviously have no clothes or anything with you and didn't get anything for your birthday last month, how about I take you birthday shopping tomorrow? I don't have to work and just got my paycheck two days ago."

Alex smiled. "Okay. That sounds good."

They both turned their attention back to the basketball game and watched it in comfortable silence. They threw out comments here and there on the play of both teams, but other than that didn't talk too much. Alex was paying a lot more attention to the game than Nick was. The older of the two was thinking more about how he was going to make this work out than who was going to stop Tony Parker from driving down the lane on every possession.

Sooner than expected, the door bell rang, announcing the arrival of their pizza. Nick got up from the couch, disturbing the sleeping Maverick in the process. The still sleepy dog slid off the couch and sought out a new place to take another nap. Nick paid for the food and then brought it back into the living room and over to the coffee table where he set it down. He handed Alex a paper plate and a can of soda before getting his own food. They ate in silence for a few minutes before it was broken by the curious eight-year-old.

"Do you know why my mom didn't want me anymore?" Alex asked quietly.

Nick swallowed the bite of his pizza and dropped his eyes from Alex's. "No...I don't know why. But whatever reason it is, it wasn't your fault. You didn't do anything wrong."

"She said I did. And Mark did too. They didn't like me. I tried to stay out of their way and everything...but I guess I was just too much of a pain for them to handle. I promise I won't be like that here though. I'll be good."

"I know you will. Don't worry Alex, everything's gonna be alright."

This time, Alex looked like he truly believed those words for the first time in his life.


	3. Chapter 3

"Don't worry Alex. They're not gonna hate you." Nick said, trying to reassure his son. 

"They didn't like me last time. What makes you think they changed their minds?"

Nick smiled slightly. "They didn't hate you. They were just confused. So was I. They're my best friends, I know they won't hate you. You'll like them too. Relax, it'll be fine."

Alex rolled his eyes. "You better be right." He said and reluctantly followed Nick into the Las Vegas Crime Lab.

They walked through the halls like they had the other day and got the same looks. Hodges didn't notice them because he was processing some evidence, which disappionted Alex. The pair finally made it to the break room where the rest of the team was waiting for them.

"Hey guys." Nick said as he walked in behind Alex, who stopped and leaned back slightly against Nick. "You guys didn't get uh...a proper introduction last time. Guys, this is Alex." He put his hands on Alex's shoulders and the little kid waved shyly. "Alex, this is Warrick, Catherine, Greg, Grissom, Sara and Brass."

"Woah." Greg said as he looked back and forth from Alex to Nick.

"Tell me about it." Brass said, his eyes as wide as his smile.

"Catherine told me you guys looked alike...but I didn't expect _this_. That's very interesting." Grissom said and took a couple steps towards them.

"They're not a science experiment Grissom." Sara said sarcastically. "I don't think they'll fit under a microscope."

"Why does he want to put us under a microscope?" Alex asked, looking up at Nick.

"Don't worry, he won't. We won't let him." Warrick said with a smile. "And don't eat anything from his fridge unless you like chocolate covered grasshoppers."

Alex shook his head. "Who would wanna eat grasshoppers?"

"Grissom." The entire graveyard shift said in unison.

Grissom rolled his eyes and sighed. "They all think they're so funny. They don't know what they're missing." He said to Alex before returning to his seat at the table next to Sara. He picked up his newspaper and continued on with his crossword puzzle.

Alex laughed. "I like him. He's funny. And so is the guy with the cool hair." He said, pointing to Greg.

"Finally someone appreciates me." Greg said with a big smile.

"He's only eight Greg." Catherine said. "He doesn't know much yet. I'm sure he'll learn soon though. Nick will set him straight. He's lucky he's got such a good dad." She said and smiled at Nick, who smiled widely back.

"So what are you guys up to today?" Sara asked.

"We're going birthday shopping cuz I don't get anything for my birthday and my last one was a month ago and he just got paid so we're going today." Alex answered.

Everyone looked at Nick in shock after hearing Alex didn't get anything for his birthday. Nick merely nodded. "Yeah, I know. Weird isn't it? Anyway...he doesn't have any clothes with him either so I gotta get him something."

Catherine shook her head slowly. "What kind of mother would do that to her kid? Send him on a plane by himself with nothing?"

"She gave me a note." Alex said with a shrug.

Nick laughed. "That's not exactly good enough Alex. Don't worry, we can fix that."

"See you guys later." Warrick said with a little wave.

"Are you working later on tonight?" Grissom asked before Nick left the breakroom.

"You're the supervisor...you don't know?" Nick asked with a sarcastic smile.

"I'm sorry I don't have the schedules of all my wonderful employees memorized. Regardless...take it off anyway." He said without ever looking up from his crossword puzzle.

"Sounds good to me Gris." Nick said before leaving the break room and lab with Alex.

* * *

A few hours later, Nick and Alex were sitting in the food court of the mall eating their lunch. They had been eating in silence for a little bit before it was once again broken by the youngest of the pair.

"Do you have any brothers or sisters?" Alex asked.

Nick nodded. "Yeah. Five sisters and a brother. All older than I am."

"Wow. That's a lot of kids."

"I know. Did you have any brothers or sisters back in Texas?"

Alex shook his head. "No, it was just me. My mom said she didn't want to make the same mistake twice. One of her boyfriends had a kid too once...but he wasn't around much or for too long. I liked him better than Mark though."

Nick took a sip of his drink and looked at Alex carefully. "Why don't you like Mark?" He asked.

"He was just mean."

"Mean how?"

Alex shrugged. "He would just yell a lot and...and stuff like that." He looked up at Nick and smiled slightly. "I like you better than him."

Nick smiled as well. "I like you too."

"How come you don't have a girlfriend?" Alex asked, showing his short attention span.

"I don't know. I was just never really that interested. Besides, I never have much time for that stuff because of work and everything." Nick said.

"That makes sense. So how come you live up here and not in Texas like my mom does?"

Nick thought about how to answer that question for a minute. "I used to live in Texas with my family. I grew up there. Then I moved here. When I went back to Texas for my brother Colin's wedding, I met your mom. I didn't know she was pregnant with you, so I came back here."

Alex frowned. "She never told you about me?"

Nick shook his head. "No. If she had, you would have met me a long time ago."

Alex nodded slowly. "My mom doesn't like you. She thinks your mean and a jerk. But she says that about a lot of people. I like you though. I bet you would hate her and Mark too. They're the jerks."

Nick laughed. "Well then it's a good thing that they're all the way back in Texas huh?"

"Yeah. I don't ever wanna live with them again. I'm gonna stay here with you, right?" Alex asked.

Nick nodded. "Yeah buddy. You get to stay here."

Alex smiled. "Good."

They finished their food and grabbed their stuff before leaving the mall. Nick had to go to the Child Services office in Vegas to sign the paperwork and talk to a lawyer to straighten everything out. After he got all that done and out of the way, he took Alex back home so he could play his new video game Nick had bought him for his birthday. While Alex was in the living room, Nick called Warrick.

"I just signed all the papers and everything. It's all settled." Nick told his best friend.

"You're absolutely sure about this?" Warrick asked.

"Yeah. I am. I know it sounds like a bad idea, but I don't have too much of a choice. I can't send him back there. They were awful to him. I can figure out how to do this."

"You don't have to do it by yourself. It's gonna be tough Nick. But that's why you have me and Catherine I guess."

Nick laughed. "Yeah...thank God for that. Are you outta work already?"

"Yeah. What are you guys up to?"

"Alex is playing that new baseball video game."

"Ahhh another game someone can beat you at." Warrick teased.

Nick rolled his eyes. "I bet he could beat you too. Come over so he can prove it."

"I'll be right there." Warrick said before hanging up.

Nick closed his phone and put it on the counter before going back into the living room. He sat down on the couch and looked at the TV screen to see how Alex's game was going.

"You like the Red Sox?" Nick asked, surprised at the choice.

Alex nodded. "Yeah, they're my favorite team."

"And you're playing against the Yankees. Well you know your baseball."

"I hate the Yankees. They're cheaters and have so much money they can buy anyone they want."

Nick nodded in agreement. "Yeah, that's true."

The front door opened and Warrick came in, closing the door behind him.

"Hi Warrick." Alex said without having to take his eyes off of the game.

"Hey Alex, Nick." Warrick said as he walked over into the living room and sat down on the recliner. "The Red Sox?"

"Yeah. A kid from Texas likes a Boston team Go figure." Nick said.

The rest of the day and on into the night went like that. The three of them played video games and just hung out. They took turns playing different people and games, seeing who was better at what. They ordered chinese food for dinner and watched movies after that. As he was sitting on the couch with his best friend and son, Nick thought that this wasn't going to be so hard after all.

That's what he thought at least.


	4. Chapter 4

It had been two months since Alex's arrival in Las Vegas and everything had been going pretty well. Alex was old and smart enough to stay at home by himself on the nights Nick had to work, but not without Nick calling every once in a while until Alex fell asleep to check up on him.

The team had quickly grown fond of the eight-year-old, who loved coming to the lab and hanging out with them. Grissom kept trying to get him to do crossword puzzles and read Shakespeare. Greg became like Alex's older brother and showed him all the cool things he knew like what music to listen to and how to play jokes on people. Catherine couldn't help but to act like a mother towards the young boy, which everyone thought was a good thing. Warrick was an extension of Nick, who everyone was surprised with how good of a job he was doing.

Alex really liked his new life and new family. He hung around with his dad all day and sometimes all night if Nick didn't have to work. If he did, Alex would either go to the lab and fool around or stay home and do the same thing. Everything was going fine and semed like it would stay that way. Until one day in the middle of July when Nick, Alex and Warrick were watching Sandlot and there was a knock at the door.

Nick got up and answered it. He opened the door to reveal a police office standing next to a man about the same age as Nick with a suit on and some papers in his hands.

"Nick Stokes?" The man in the suit asked.

"Yeah, that's me. How can I help you?"

"I'm Tom Brenault, Stephanie and Mark Hassett's lawyer."

"Who?" Nick asked in confusion.

"Stephanie Jacobs and Mark Hassett."

Nick recognized the names now. "Oh. Uhh...okay, what's this about?"

"Alex. They're suing you for custody of him."

Nick shook his head. "They sent him to me. They didn't want anything to do with him."

"Well I guess they changed their minds."

Hearing his name be said made Alex come over to the door and stand next to his dad. He looked up at Nick and asked, "What's going on?"

"Nothing...go back inside buddy."

"Actually..." Brenault said, "He's gonna have to come with us. Child Services will be looking after him until after it's decided who he's going to be living with."

"He's living with me." Nick said. "They didn't want him. I filled out all the paperwork and everything. He's my kid, they're the ones who didn't want him."

The younger police officer stepped forward. "Sir, if you don't allow the kid to come with us I'm afraid I'm going to have to arrest you."

At this point, Warrick had also come to the door and was standing next to Nick with Alex in front of them. "What's going on?" He asked Nick.

"Steph wants Alex back so she's suing me for custody. So they're arresting me." Nick explained.

"It doesn't have to come to that Mr. Stokes." Brenault said. "Just let Alex go with Child Services and he'll be taken care of."

"He's not going anywhere." Nick said just as another cop car pulled up in front of his house.

Captain Brass go out of the passenger seat and quickly walked up the house. Instead of standing on the front porch with the other officer and Brenault, he took another step and turned around to face them. He stood next to Warrick and Nick and looked very, very mad.

"What exactly do you think you're doing here?" He asked.

"Giving Mr. Stokes his papers about the lawsuit. We looked for him at work, but he wasn't there so we came here." Brenault said.

"That's _how_ I knew you were here smartass." Brass said. "You're not arresting him, and you're not taking Alex. Child Services hasn't even been informed about this lawsuit, and as far as they're concerned Nick is Alex's legal parent and guardian. Give him the papers and get the hell out of here."

The officer looked from Brass to Brenault, who was somewhat embarrassed. "Fine then. We'll just see you in court."

"Court? Don't you just get an arbitrator for this kind of thing?" Nick asked.

Brenault shook his head. "You could, but that's not the case this time. This is going to be a trial to find the best interest of the child. The judge will decide that." And with that, Brenault and the confused police office turned and left.

"Dad, what's going on?" Alex asked with worry in his voice.

Nick lead everyone back into his house and closed the door. "Your mom and Mark want you to go back and live with them again."

Alex shook his head quickly. "No. I don't want to. You said I could stay here."

Nick crouched down in front of Alex. "I know. Don't worry, you're gonna be able to stay here with me. It's gonna be okay."

Brass was looking over the paperwork Brenault had given them. "This makes no sense. They basis is Alex came up for a visit and you wouldn't let him go back. Do they really think they have a chance?"

Nick stood and sighed. "I don't know. I don't know what to do."

"Just don't get arrested." Warrick said. "Go talk to the lawyer you did before at Child Services. He's gotta know what to do in situaitons like this. I'll stay here with Alex."

Nick nodded. "Yeah...good idea."

"Come on." Brass said. "I'll give you a ride."

"Alex, stay here with Warrick. I'll be back soon, okay?"

Alex merely nodded and Nick and Brass left. He went over to the couch with Warrick and resumed watching their movie. Alex didn't stay quiet for long.

"My dad doesn't want me anymore, does he?" He asked Warrick.

"He does. It's just that your mom wants you to go back and live with her instead of here. Your dad wants you here Alex, trust me. He loves having you live with him."

"Is that why they were gonna arrest him? Cuz he wanted me to stay?"

Warrick nodded. "Yeah. But Don't worry. Your dad's a smart guy. He's gonna make sure everything's gonna turn out okay. This isn't your fault. All you gotta do is relax and let your dad handle it, okay?"

Alex sighed and sat back against the cushions of the couch. "Okay. He promised I wouldn't have to go back, and I believe him."

* * *

"They can't do that, can they?" Nick asked after explaining to the lawyer and Child Services worker Keith Gaines what had happened.

Gaines looked over the papers a few times before looking up at Nick. "It's tricky because the legality of what they're doing isn't going to matter. In cases like this, it's all about the best interest of the kid. The 'trial' is going to be solely based on which parent Alex is best off with. Have you seen Big Daddy?"

Nick frowned in confusion. "Yeah..."

"That's more or less how it's going to be. Except you didn't fradulently gain custody of him, they're just going to try and make it seem like that."

Nick nodded. "Okay. So is this going to be bad?"

Gaines shook his head. "No. I honestly can't see them winning this case. After everything Alex went through with them down there shows that they're not good parents. All it's going to be is a few testimonies to determine who Alex should be living with. It's not like a full out trial. The judge specializes in these cases."

"Like Judge Judy." Nick said.

"Exactly. It's not going to be hard to convince the judge that your the best parent for Alex. He's going to have to be questioned though. He can't pick who he wants to live with because he's not old enough, but what he says will really help."

"Okay." Nick stood and shook hands with Gaines. "Thanks a lot."

"Your welcome. Don't worry about it Nick, we're gonna be fine."

Nick left the office hoping that Gaines was right. The last thing he wanted was for Alex to be forced to go back to Texas and live with people who he clearly hated. Nick was going to make sure he did everything he could to keep the promise he made to his son.

He finally got back home and found Alex and Warrick still in the living room, but were now watching Golden Eye. He sat down heavily in the recliner and fixed his eyes on the TV to try and relax.

"How'd it go?" Warrick asked.

"Good. Gaines said there's really no way they're gonna win. We're gonna be all set."

They fell into silence after that and just watched the movie. Alex seemed to really be enjoying this James Bond classic. They all soon forgot about the lawsuit and fell into their normal routine of hanging around and watching movies. Nick was still a little worried, but didn't think about it too much. Alex had completely forgotten about it and wasn't worried at all because he knew that his dad would be able to take care of anything.


	5. Chapter 5

Spoilers in this chapter and later chapters for 'Overload'.

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"I don't wanna go back there. Why can't I stay with you?" Alex asked. He was nervous about what was going to happen and didn't want to go anywhere without Nick.

"You just have to go with the Child Service lady into the back until we need you in a little bit. It's going to be really long and boring where I am, you don't wanna sit through all that. It's gonna be okay, trust me."

Alex reluctantly left his dad and went into the back of the court house with Mrs. Jefferson, who was going to be with him until his testimony was needed. Nick ran his hands through his dark hair several times before sighing heavily and dropping his arms back to his sides.

"You ready?" Warrick asked, nodding towards the door.

"I guess so. Let's go." Nick said.

They walked into the court room together but parted ways when Nick went through the gates and to the table on the left where Gaines was waiting for him. Warrick, Catherine, Grissom, Brass, Greg and Sara were sitting directly behind Nick and Gaines. They all looked anxious and a little nervous.

Trying to ease the tension, Nick faced his friends and said to Grissom, "They wouldn't let you bring a crossword puzzle in here?"

That got everyone to laugh a little. "No." Grissom said. "But I don't need one. I can do them in my head."

Nick nodded. "That's creepy man." He said before turning back around and facing the bench.

A few minutes later, everyone rose when the judge came in from his chamber, and they all sat down when Judge Sheridan did. The 'trial' began, but Nick wasn't paying too much attention. He was thinking about what he was going to say to prove that Alex belonged in Vegas with him. Soon enough, Stephanie Jacobs Hassett was called to the stand to give her testimony. She took her oath and then sat down.

"Mrs. Hassett...can you please explain what happened?" Brenault asked her.

Steph nodded. "I sent Alex up to Vegas to meet his father. He was supposed to come home after a little while, but Nick wouldn't let him."

"Why not?"

"I'm not sure. He wanted to keep him after I did all the hard work of raising him on my own without any of his help. I guess he realized what he had been missing."

Nick blocked out the rest of what she said to Brenualt's questions. He didn't start paying attention again until Gaines got up to ask his own questions.

"Mrs. Hassett...why did you send an eight-year-old on a plane all by himself without any clothes or money?"

Steph shrugged. "I don't know. I knew he could manage by himself."

"If Alex was supposed to return home, then why did you send him with this note telling Mr. Stokes it was his turn and you didn't want anything to do with Alex anymore?" Gaines asked.

Judge Sheridan took the white piece of paper and read it before looking over to Stephanie. "Answer his question." He said.

"Well it was his turn. He didn't help out the first eight years, I had to do it all by myself."

Gaines nodded slightly. "So when you found out you were pregnant and knew Nick Stokes was the father, you contacted him and he refused to help you at all?" Steph went silent. "Oh...so you didn't let him know? How was he supposed to help when he didn't even know he had a son?"

"He was irresponsible and left. It's his fault."

A few more minutes of questions and answers like those went on before it was Nick's turn to be asked similar questions. By the time he had taken his oath and sat down, he had noticed that Brenault had changed from a seemingly jerk of a guy to one who doubted his client's claims.

"Is it true that Mrs. Hassett didn't contact you and inform you about Alex?"

"Yes, I never knew until he showed up at my work."

"And you assumed responsibility without even being absolutely sure that he was in fact your son?"

Nick thought Brenault was trying to help him more than his own clients. "Yes. I went down to Child Services and filled out all the paperwork."

Brenault nodded. "Thank you." He said before returning to his seat. Mark and Stephanie protested to his bad questions, but he ignored them and watched Gaines ask a few more. After that was over with, Alex was brought out from the back room and lead to the stand where he sat down and waited.

Brenault stood and walked up to the young boy. "Alex, can you tell me what it was like when you lived in Texas with your mom?"

Alex didn't say anything. All he seemed to be able to do was stare at Mark, who was staring right back. Nick noticed Alex's hands were shaking on his legs and his face was as white as a ghost. After a few short minutes of Alex sitting there too scared to speak, Nick stood up and walked over to the stand. He leaned against the front of it and ignored the yelling from Mark. He somewhat heard the judge tell Mark to sit down and shut up.

"What's wrong buddy?" Nick asked, getting Alex's attention.

"I can't say anything." Alex whispered.

"Why not?"

Alex looked over at Mark, then back to his dad. "Because...Mark told me that if I ever told anyone what he did he'd kill me. But then when I was going to the back room he stopped to talk to me for a second and said that if I told them anything he was going to kill _you_ instead." A few tears fell from Alex's scared brown eyes without him realizing it. He also didn't realize that the judge was sitting close enough to hear him, but Sheridan didn't say anything.

"Alex, all you have to do is answer that guy's questions and everything will be okay. Don't look at Mark. Look at the lawyer, or look at me. Mark's not going to hurt anyone. I promise. Just answer the questions and I'll get you out of here."

"But I don't want you to get hurt."

Nick shook his head slowly. "See Warrick and all them sitting behind me?" Alex nodded. "They'd do anyhing to make sure that you and me are safe. You have nothing to worry about. If for whatever reason they're help is needed, they'll come to the rescue. All you have to do is answer a couple questions and I promise we can go home." He smiled reassuringly and went back to his seat.

Brenault stood where he had before and asked Alex the same question. "What was it like living in Texas with your mom and Mark?"

Alex looked at Nick, who nodded. He took a deep breath and kept his eyes on his dad. "It was awful. My mom always yelled at me and Mark..." Alex trailed off.

Nick picked up on the familiar tone in his voice. He knew what that meant because he remembered sounding like that before when he was younger. Nick knew why Alex didn't want to say anything because the same thing had happened to him twenty-six years ago.

"What about Mark?" Brenault asked. "Don't worry Alex, you're safe. If you tell us what happened, we can make sure it never happens again."

Alex nodded slightly. "He...beat me up a lot. And a couple times when I was getting ready to go to bed he made me..." Alex's voice cracked and he stopped talking. Brenault looked to Judge Sheridan, who nodded signifying that no more explanation was needed.

"You don't have to say anything else Alex." Brenault said. He smiled slightly at the young boy and returned to his seat next to Stephanie at the table. He didn't look at her or Mark. He stared straight ahead and just waited.

Alex's eyes moved from Nick to Mark. Upon doing so, his entire body started shaking at the anger in the man's eyes. "Dad..." Alex said weakly, his voice fill with fear.

Nick was looking at Alex, so he didn't see Mark stand up and start to run over to the stand. Sheridan didn't see it either because he was writing something down and discussing courses of action with Mrs. Jefferson. The only people that did see it in time couldn't do anything physically about it, but Catherine still tried.

"Nick!" She yelled, causing Nick to see Mark advancing on Alex earlier than he would have without her help. Without any hesitation, Nick got up and ran across the few feet separating him from where Alex was sitting helplessly. He got to Mark a split second after the other man was reaching out to grab Alex.

"You little son of a bitch!" Mark yelled, getting the attention of everyone else in the court room who hadn't already been watching. Before Mark could reach Alex, he was being pulled back by Nick, who punched him in the face and forcefully threw him to the ground. Mark didn't even have time to stand on his own before the baliff was dragging him to his feet. Nick jumped over the stand and kneeled in front of where Alex was sitting.

"Alex..." Nick said to get his son to look at him instead of Mark. "Listen to me. You're safe now. No one's going to hurt you. It's all over, okay?"

Alex nodded slowly. "Can we go home now? Please?"

"Yeah, we can."

Alex stood along with Nick and they got off the stand. Nick lead Alex away from where Mark was standing with the baliff and another police officer over to the table where Gaines was standing. He kept one hand on Alex's shoulder at all times, just in case.

"I think you missed the part where Sheridan granted you custody and put a restraining order on those two." Gaines said, nodding towards Mark and Stephanie.

"Really? When did that happen?" Nick asked.

"When you were talking to Alex. Don't worry, there's no more paperwork or anything because you already did all of that. There's nothing left to worry about."

Nick shook hands with Gaines. "Thanks for everything." He said.

"My pleasure. Take care." Gaines said with a smile before gathering his things and leaving. Nick sighed and turned to face his friends, who were now all standing and looking extremely relieved.

"Are you two okay?" Catherine asked.

Nick nodded. "Yeah. I'm gonna take him home now. Hopefully this will all just go away."

Nick's friends nodded in understanding and watched their friend and his son leave the court house slowly but surely. They only hung around for a few more minutes before they left themselves. They didn't doubt that Alex would eventually be able to move past this. It was Nick they were more worried about, especially considering his own past.

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Thanks for the reviews. The next chapter will be up shortly. Hope you're enjoying it. 


	6. Chapter 6

Nick gripped the steering wheel harder to try and stop his hands from shaking. He focused as hard as he could on the road so that he wouldn't have to look over at Alex and see that look in his eyes that Nick knew himself all too well. He knew how Alex was feeling and wanted nothing more than to make it go away. But he didn't know how. 

After ten minutes of complete silence, Alex couldn't take it anymore. "Are you mad at me?" He asked.

"No." Nick said. He looked over at Alex long enough to see his brown eyes were filled with sadness and guilt. He looked back at the road and swallowed the lump in his throat. "I know what you did back there was hard, but it was the right thing to do. I know you were scared too...but it's okay to be scared. I was just as scared as you were."

"Why were you scared?"

"Because..." Nick hesitated for a second. "That same thing happened to me when I was little too. What Mark did to you was wrong, and it wasn't your fault. No matter what he said to you, you didn't do anything wrong."

Out of the corner of his eye, Nick could see that Alex was still looking at him. He forced himself to stare straight ahead.

"You don't...do that too...do you?" Alex asked.

Nick looked over at Alex, who's eyes had been over taken by fear. "Do what?"

"W-what Mark d-did." Alex's voice was shaky, causing him to stutter.

Nick's breath caught in his throat. He immediatly thought he was going to throw up just thinking about what Alex meant. His hands were shaking so bad and his vision was blurred by the tears in his eyes. Nick pulled over to the side of the road and stopped the car. He turned and faced Alex and spoke when he finally could.

"I would never, ever do anything to hurt you. Especially like that. What happened to you before...and anything else...will never happen again. I'm gonna protect you and make sure no one ever hurts you. I promise you that."

Alex nodded slowly. "Did it really happen to you too?" He asked quietly.

"Yeah...I was your age too." Nick answered.

"Why did it hurt so much?" Tears were also forming in Alex's eyes, threatening to spill out.

Nick had no idea how to answer. He wasn't exactly sure himself. "I...don't know buddy. You're so small and he wanted to hurt you..."

Alex seemed satisfied with that response. "I'm sorry." He whispered.

Nick shook his head. "Don't be sorry. It wasn't your fault, okay? You didn't do anything wrong."

Alex smiled slightly. "Okay." He said and sat back in his seat.

Alex rested his elbow against window and held his head in his hands. He looked exhausted, so Nick started the car again and got him back home as fast as he could. The young boy dragged himself into the house and quickly changed before saying goodnight to Nick and going to bed. He fell asleep almost instantly, which Nick was grateful for. He only wished he could do the same.

He knew he wasn't going to be able to sleep, so instead Nick went into the living room and sat down heavily after changing into more comfortable clothes. He turned the TV on even though he knew he wouldn't be able to concentrate on anything. He was glad that the sick feeling in his stomach had started to fade away, but the stinging around his eyes hadn't. Nick tried to force down the anger that was welling up inside him at the thought of what Mark had done to Alex. He took several deep breaths to try and calm himself down, but nothing was working.

When there was a knock at the door, Nick hoped that it was Mark so that he could beat the hell out of him for doing what he had to his son. Despite his wishes to get into a fight, he wasn't disappointed when Catherine was on the other side of the door.

Nick smiled sadly at her and stepped aside to let her inside. "Hey Cath." He said as he closed the door and followed her over to the couch. They sat down and weren't quiet for long before Catherine made the purpose of her visit known.

"How are you holding up?" She asked, rubbing Nick's arm gently with her soft hand.

"I'm fine." He said. He tried to fool her with a smile, but it didn't work. Catherine was the only one that really knew the whole story about Nick's babysitter, and whenever cases like this turned up she always checked up on him. Now that such an awful thing happened to his son, she was extremely worried.

"Don't lie to me Nicky." She said in that motherly tone of hers. "I know this can't be easy for you at all."

Nick hung his head. "You're right." He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "It's my fault that happened to him."

"No it's not. Don't blame yourself."

"But it _is_ my fault." Nick lifted his head and looked at Catherine. "If I had been there when he was growing up, that wouldn't have happened. There's no fucking way I would have let something like that happen to him. If I had just been there, he wouldn't have had to go through that."

Catherine shook her head slowly. "You didn't even know about him. It's not your fault he didn't have a responsible mom to tell you. There's nothing more you could have done."

"I could have been there. I could have stopped it from happening to him too." The tears started to fall from Nick's eyes. "Why did it have to happen to him too?"

Catherine pulled Nick into a tight hug and rubbed his back soothingly. "I don't know. Bad things happen for no apparent reason. But it wasn't your fault, just like it happening to you wasn't your fault. Alex is lucky to have you in his life now because you're gonna keep him safe and give him a good life."

"What if I can't? What if I mess things up even more than they are right now?"

"You won't. I know you. I can tell how much you love him. There's now way you're going to be anything but the best thing in Alex's life."

Nick wanted to believe what Catherine was saying, but he just couldn't. Everything else he's ever done always turned out bad, what makes this different? In his mind, Nick wasn't a good role model. He didn't think that he was capable of taking care of someone else without messing up. He could barely take care of himself.

"Maybe this is a bad idea Cath..." Nick said. He was stil being held close by Catherine and hoped she wasn't going to let go anytime soon.

Catherine shook her head again. "I don't think it is. It's going to be tough and will have it's ups and downs, but the bottom line is I know that you can handle anything and would be such a great dad. You may not think so, but it's true Nicky."

"I hope your right."

"I'm always right."

Nick laughed lightly and Catherine gave him one last reassuring squeeze before letting him go and pulling back. She smiled sweetly at him, getting a smile back in return. She could tell the smile wasn't forced and was glad to see it there.

"How's Alex?" Catherine asked.

Nick sighed slightly. "He's okay now I guess. He fell asleep as soon as we got home." He looked off into the hallway towards Alex's room, and his eyes got darker.

"What's wrong?"

Nick looked back at Catherine and knew he wouldn't be able to deny this one either. He figured it'd be easier just to tell her. "On the way home, he asked me why it hurt so much. And I didn't know either." A few more tears fell down Nick's cheeks and Catherine gently brushed them away. "Then he asked me if I...do what Mark did to him too."

Catherine was shocked to hear that, but it didn't stop her from trying to comfort her friend. "He's young. He doesn't understand that not everyone is like that. Alex grew up in such a bad home he doesn't know what a normal one is. Don't worry, everything's gonna be okay."

Nick nodded. "Yeah...he didn't even know you were supposed to get presents on your birthday. I'm glad he doesn't have to go back to that." Catherine nodded in agreement.

Nick sighed and fell back against the couch. His eyes were bloodshot from crying and his skin was pale from being over tired. He looked like he could use some sleep and maybe a drink or two. But Catherine knew he wouldn't be doing either anytime soon, so she called Warrick and had him bring some food over for them all to eat and just hangout.

"You guys don't have to stay here ya know." Nick said after they had finished eating the pizza Warrick had brought.

"Yes we do." Catherine and Warrick said in unison.

Nick smiled and nothing else was said. They all just sat back, relaxed and enjoyed each other's company. Nick was so thankful that he had such good friends that he knew would always be there for him, and now for Alex too. He knew he was going to need all the help he could get and was glad that he would be getting it from the two people he trusted most.

Maybe everything really was going to be okay.


	7. Chapter 7

Summer was slowly coming to an end and Alex wasn't happy that he would have to be going to school again in a couple weeks. But he put that in the back of his mind, along with what had happened with Mark and his mom, and tried to enjoy the rest of the summer he had left hanging out and having fun with his dad. That wasn't hard to do either. 

After a day at the go-kart track had made Alex extremely tired. He had just eaten as much food as he could at Wendy's and was ready to crash. It wasn't that late yet, but he didn't care what time it was. He was exhausted and somewhat mad that he wasn't able to beat his dad in a race no matter how hard he tried or how many corners he cut.

"Thank God I don't have to work tonight, I'm just as tired as you are." Nick said on their way home from Wendy's.

Alex rolled his eyes jokingly. "You barely even had to try! That wasn't fair because your older than I am and have driven a lot more than I have."

"Driving a little go-kart is not the same as driving a car Alex. Don't worry, some day you'll be able to beat me at something. Maybe."

Alex punched his dad's arm, but caused no pain. "Someday **soon** I'm going to be able to beat you at everything. It's gonna be so fun too cuz you don't think it'll ever happen but it will. Don't worry about that dad."

Nick just shook his head and smiled at his son. He didn't know why, but everytime Alex called him 'dad' he got this feeling that this was exactly what he was meant to do. He knew he had made the right decision and was so glad that he did. He didn't want to think about how much he would have missed out on if Alex had never come into his life. He was learning as much from the young boy as vice versa. Anyone who saw the two together could see they truly were happy and Nick would do anything to keep that big smile on Alex's face.

They finally got back home and it was clear Alex was completely wiped out. After a quick shower, he changed into basketball shorts and a t-shirt before joining Nick on the couch to watch SportsCenter. They watched the baseball highlights for a little while before Alex yawned widely and slid off the couch.

"Good night dad." He said in his sleep filled voice.

"Good night Alex." Nick said as he watched his kid slowly trudge off to his room. He heard the door close and there was little doubt in his mind that the eight-year-old was going to be asleep in minutes. Nick went back to watching SportsCenter. Half an hour later, when he was about to fall asleep on the couch, Nick heard Alex call out from his bedroom.

"Dad!" Alex yelled. His voice was filled with the same fear he had in it before.

Nick jumped off the couch and ran to Alex's bedroom door. It was locked for the first time since Alex had moved in with him. Nick heard Alex yell again and it only took Nick a few seconds to kick in the door, shattering the lock and part of the door frame. He pushed the door to the side and stepped into Alex's room. His heart skipped a beat when he saw Alex curled up in a ball on his bed, trying to protect himself from Mark, who was grabbing him by the shoulders and trying to make him lay flat.

"Get off of him!" Nick demanded. When Mark paid no attention, Nick quickly crossed over to the bed and tackled Mark off of Alex. "Run Alex!" Nick said breathlessly as he struggled to fend off Mark. After a punch to the chest, Mark was able to wriggle free of Nick's grasp and ran after Alex, who had fled to the living room.

Nick got to his feet and scrambled after them, but didn't get there in time. He froze when he saw Mark holding onto Alex tightly while holding a knife under his chin. Nick locked eyes with Alex and saw just how scared his son was. Nick took a deep breath to try and stay calm before looking up at Mark, who was smiling wickedly. Alex was struggling against Mark, almost causing the blade to come into contact with his skin.

"Don't move Alex." Nick instructed, and Alex reluctantly did as he was told. "Let him go Mark." He said. Nick's voice was strong and level, hiding his fear well.

Mark shook his head. "Why would I want to do that? This little son if a bitch told everyone what I warned him not to. His mistake, not mine."

"A real mistake would be for you to do anything other than letting him go right now and getting the fuck out of here." Nick saw Alex flinch slightly at his dad's harsh words, but Nick ignored that. "I swear to God if you touch him-"

Mark cut Nick off. "Are you afraid I'm going to rape your kid again? What if I do? What are you gonna do to me?"

"I'll kill you. Let him go." Nick had taken a couple steps forward so that now he was only about six feet away from Mark and Alex. Mark tightened his grip on the young boy and shook his head, the awful smile still on his face.

"I don't think so pal. I'd rather have my way with him again. I bet you like it too you little faggot." Mark said, looking down so he was addressing Alex.

Nick took the moment of broken eye contact to charge at Mark, who didn't see it coming until he looked back up. But it was too late then. Nick had grabbed Alex and pulled him away to the side. He pushed his son as hard as he could and cringed slightly when he heard him hit the wall off to his right. Mark wasn't stunned for long. He reacted to Nick's actions by lunging at him with the knife, but Nick was faster. He grabbed Mark's wrist just in time and tried to pull it back. He only succeeded in moving it a few inches.

However, Mark was stronger than Nick. He pushed down on Nick's left shoulder and kicked out his right knee at the same time so the other man fell to the ground. Nick was kneeling in front of Mark, who had regained control of the knife. He pulled a gun from the back of his jeans and motioned to Alex, who was sitting up against the wall wide-eyed.

"Come here." Mark said. Alex didn't move.

Mark pointed the gun at Alex, but didn't have to say anything because Nick did. "It's okay Alex. Stand up and come over here buddy."

Alex slowly got to his feet and walked over and stood next to his dad. His small hands were shaking and there were unshed tears building up in his dark brown eyes. Mark pulled Alex over so he was standing in front of Nick and handed the kid the knife.

"Alex, you have to make a decision here. You either kill your dad, or I'll make sure to torture you in ways you can't even imagine you little pain in the ass." Alex wasn't looking at Mark. He was looking at his dad dead in the eyes. He shook his head to Mark's request and tried to give the knife back, but it wasn't accpeted. "Do it." Mark said forcefully.

Nick reached up and put his hands on Alex's shoulders. "It's okay Alex. Go ahead, I won't be mad at you."

Alex shook his head. "But I can't do th-"

Nick squeezed his shoulders gently. "I don't want you to get hurt. It doesn't matter what happens to me as long as you're safe, okay?" Alex nodded weakly. Nick dropped his hands back to his sides. "Go ahead buddy. Everything's gonna be okay, I promise."

Alex didn't want to listen to his dad, but he couldn't help it. He allowed Nick to slowly raise his right hand up and pressed the tip against middle of Nick's torso. Nick held his hand there for a second before letting go of Alex's wrist. Since Nick was kneeling, he was at eye level with Alex. The eight-year-old stared into his dad's eyes with fear in his own. Nick just nodded slightly and smiled. Alex closed his eyes and pushed as hard as he could.

Nick was glad that the air had been froced from his lungs because he wasn't able to yell out in pain. A searing hot sensation coursed all throughout his body and was unlike anything he had ever felt before. He tried to take a deep breath, but everything seemed like it was moving in slow motion. All he could think about was the awful pain in his chest.

"Harder." Mark said.

Alex gritted his teeth and pushed again, sending the knife deeper into Nick's flesh. Blood was pouring from the wound and down the front of Nick's grey t-shirt, leaving a deep crimson trail that lead all the way down his faded blue jeans and onto the wood floor. Alex finally pulled back, bringing the knife with his hand. He dropped it to the ground and kept his eyes closed tightly.

Nick forced his brain to forget about the pain and think about his son. He concentrated all of his energy on not going into shock an d staying conscious. He grabbed Alex's arm and pulled him away from where he was standing. Or tried to. Mark reached out before Alex was too far away and pulled him back from the weakened father of the boy. He wrapped his arm around Alex's shoulders. Alex opened his eyes and figured out what was probably going to happen, so he bit into Mark's arm as hard as he could until he tasted blood. Mark yelled out and released Alex before stumbling backwards a few feet. He dropped the gun to the floor due to the pain that had been inflicted to his arm.

Alex picked up the gun and aimed it at Mark in one fluent motion. The young boy was unable to hold it steady though because he wasn't that strong and his hands were shaking. He managed to pull the trigger, but missed his target. The bullet sailed past Mark's body and imapacted the wall. Mark stood still for a second before a sneer appeared on his face. He forgot about his arm and started to run at Alex.

Alex dropped the gun and scrambled off away from Mark. He only made it a few steps before he heard another loud gunshot ring out. He stopped dead in his tracks and expected there to be a lot more pain than there was right now. He was confused that he was still alive because he thought he had just been shot. He spun around and found his answer.

Nick brought his hand down to his side, still holding the gun he had just used to kill Mark. Mark was laying face down on the floor four feet away from Nick. A dark cirlce of blood was growing bigger from underneath Mark's lifeless body. Nick dropped the gun from his hand and closed his eyes as he slowly swayed to his right. He continued to fall to the side until his body landed on the floor and layed still.

Alex rushed over to his dad, forgetting about everything else. He kneeled next to Nick's head and shook his dad's shoulder as hard as he could. "Wake up dad!" He pleaded. The tears finally started to fall from his eyes.

Nick opened his eyes slowly and looked up at Alex. "Alex...you have to listen to me very carefully." Nick whispered. It was hard for him to speak, but the knew he had to ensure Alex's safety before anything else.

"I'll do whatever you say...just please don't die." Alex's voice was full of fear.

"Hand me the knife." Alex did as he was told and frowned when Nick started wiping it off on his bloody t-shirt. "Now go into your room and change into different clothes...take those ones off and hide them...where no one will ever find them..." Nick struggled to keep his eyes open. "Then wash your hands and arms as hard as you can, okay?"

Alex nodded and did as he was told despite his confusion as to why he was doing it. When he was almost done washing his hands, he heard another gunshot from the living room. He ran back in and saw that his dad had just shot Mark in the arm where Alex had bitten him.

"Why did you do that?" He asked. His voice cracked with everything he said.

Nick shook his head. "That doesn't matter. Now...go call Brass and tell him to send an ambulance...he'll know what to do...and call Warrick." Alex nodded slowly. "Then I want you to go into your room and stay there until Warrick gets here. Don't say anything to anyone, not even him. Just stay quiet and do what he tells you, okay? All you have to say is..." Nick trailed off slightly. His vision was slowly starting to fade to black and he knew he would pass out soon. "Say you were sleeping and don't know what happened. Warrick will take care of you until you see me again." Nick let his eyes closed. "It's gonna be okay, I swear."


	8. Chapter 8

Alex sat in the backseat of Brass' police cruiser wrapped up tightly in a wool blanket. He normally loved to ride in the police car with the siren blaring and the lights flashing. But this situation was completely different. He wasn't joyriding around town for the fun of it. The lights were flashing for a legitament reason, not to amuse the young boy. Alex sat in the silence of the car and waited for someone to tell him what was going on. He had tried a couple times to get out of the car, but of course you can't open the doors from the inside. So he just sat there impatiently for what seemed like forever until Warrick and Catherine finally got to the house. 

Alex saw them get out of their Denali as quickly as possible. Catherine ran up to Brass, who was standing just outside of the police cruiser Alex was in. They immediatly engaged in conversation and seemed to be trying to think things through. Warrick stopped short of the pair and opened the passenger side door to the back seat. He climbed in and sat next to Alex before closing the door, once again blocking out the noise from outside.

"Are you okay Alex?" Warrick asked.

Alex nodded. "I'm fine."

"Good." Warrick said. "Can you tell me what happened?"

Alex looked over at Warrick with sad eyes. "I can't." Warrick frowned and Alex tried to correct his mistake. "I mean I don't know what happened. I was asleep and then I heard yelling and I don't know what happened...honestly."

Warrick nodded slowly. "Okay pal. It's alright, you're not in trouble or anything."

"Is my dad in trouble?" Alex asked.

Warrick shook his head. "No...your dad's going to be fine."

"Good...cuz he was just trying to protect me, that's why-" Alex stopped himself just in time.

"That's why what?" Warrick asked, picking up on the child's hesistation.

"Nothing. I'm just really tired and confused. Can I see my dad now?" Tears were once again building up in Alex's eyes.

"He's at the hospital right now. But in a little while you can when he's awake. We just gotta wait a little bit until he feels better, okay?"

Alex nodded weakly. "Okay." Alex sighed and closed his eyes. He let his head fall to the side and rest against Warrick's shoulder. Warrick comfortingly wrapped his arm around Alex's shoulders and was glad to see him drifiting off to sleep. When Catherine opened the door and climbed in as well, he motioned for her to be quiet.

"He's asleep." Warrick whispered.

Catherine nodded. "Good, he looks like he needs some rest." She lightly brushed her hand through Alex's dark hair. "I was just inside...Mark's dead." She informed Warrick.

"He should be. Now maybe this will all go away and stay away."

"Yeah...I just wish it didn't have to come to that ya know? But either way, at least they're both safe."

"How's Nick doing?" Warrick asked.

Catherine shrugged. "No one knows. He was rushed away to the hospital. Brass said he looked pretty bad. He had been stabbed in the chest and had lost a sufficient amount of blood. But it's Nicky...I'm sure he'll be just fine as always."

* * *

Alex sat in the waiting room in between Warrick and Catherine. He was still very tired, but refused to fall asleep. He was afraid that if he did, he would miss out on something happening or would miss the chance to go in and see his dad. He thought that if something bad happened, no one would tell him. And he didn't want to miss anything.

After a few hours of sitting there, a doctor came into the room and motioned for Warrick to come over to him so they could speak. Alex wished he could hear what they were saying, but he was sitting too far away.

"How's he doing?" Warrick asked after shaking hands with Dr. Anderson.

"He's fine. We stopped all the bleeding and stitched him up. He's just resting right now and will be tired for a couple of days. The damage wasn't as bad as I first thought. The wound track was a bit unsual. It wasn't that deep and didn't go in a straight line. Whoever stabbed him hesitated, then thrusted again at a slightly different angle. Also, whoever did it was either not trying to kill Nick or wasn't strong enough too because the wound wasn't deep enough to inflict fatal damage."

Warrick nodded slightly. "Thanks Doc. Can we see him?"

"Yes, he should be awake soon. If your quiet and don't disturb him, a few people can go in and wait for him to wake up. It shouldn't be too long." Anderson replied before shaking hands with Warrick again and heading back down the hallway.

Warrick returned to Catherine and Alex. Alex immediatly stood up from his seat and asked, "Is my dad dead?"

Warrick shook his head. He picked Alex up and sat him back down in his seat before sitting down next to him. "No, he's fine. He's just asleep right now. You can go in and wait for him to wake up if you want." Alex nodded before eagerly heading off and disappearing into Nick's room. Warrick made sure he got in there okay before turning to Catherine.

"What did the doctor say?" She asked.

"That the damage wasn't too bad because whoever stabbed him wasn't trying to kill him, or wasn't strong enough too."

Catherine and Warrick locked eyes for a second before their heads snapped in the direction of Nick's room where Alex was now. They looked back at each other and shook their heads.

"There's no way it was Alex. He wouldn't do that...we both know that." Catherine said reassuringly.

"Yeah...you're right. I just hope they're both okay ya know?"

Catherine nodded. "They will be because they have you looking out for them as well as everyone else." They sat in silence for a few minutes before Catherine broke it. "Let's leave them alone for a bit and go down and get something to eat. Then when Nick's fully awake we can bring him some food."

"Sounds like a good idea to me." Warrick said as they rose from their chairs and he followed Catherine downstairs to the cafeteria, leaving Alex and Nick in the hospital room just down the hall.

* * *

Alex managed to restrain himself from waking his dad up. He was extremely anxious to talk to him so that maybe he would get an explanation. He also needed to hear that everything really was going to be okay. Sitting there in the chair beside Nick's hospital bed scared the hell out of Alex. He was trying not to think of what would happen to him if his dad never woke up again when Nick's eyes slowly opened and looked over at his son.

"Are you okay?" Nick immeditaly asked.

"You're the one in the hospital." Alex responded.

Nick looked around him as he sat up slowly. "Yeah, good point." He stilfed a yawn before asking Alex, "What happened after I blacked out?"

Alex tried to remember everything that had happened in what seemed like such a short time. "I called Warrick then Brass...or Brass then Warrick, I don't remember...then Brass and other cops and the ambulance showed up. They took you away and Brass gave me a blanket and put me in the backseat of his car so everyone would leave me alone. Then Warrick and Catherine showed up and waited with me until Brass took us here."

"Did anyone ask you what happened?" Alex nodded. "What did you tell them?"

"That I was asleep and then I heard yelling so I got up and saw you and called Brass. Warrick was the only one that asked me. Brass wouldn't let anyone else talk to me or anything."

"Good. They won't ask you anymore questions, I'll take care of everything. Don't worry about what happened, it's over now."

"You're not mad at me?" Alex asked.

Nick shook his head. "No. I told you I wasn't going to be. I would have been madder if you hand't done it and gotten yourself hurt. You didn't do anything wrong."

"Then why can't we tell anyone what really happened?"

Nick sighed and ran his hand through his hair. "What actually happened is tricky to explain. Some people could look at the evidence and think things that aren't true, and I don't wanna risk you getting in trouble. So I told you to do all that to make sure that you wouldn't get in any trouble at all."

"Oh." Was all Alex could say. "I just don't understand how hurting you was the right thing to do...no matter what you say, I'm still sorry I did it."

Nick smiled. "Okay, fine. If you don't believe me on that, believe me on this: no matter what happens, I'm always gonna be here. No matter what you end up doing now or when you're older, you're still my son. Nothing can change that, okay?"

Alex nodded weakly. "I was just scared before that you weren't gonna be here anymore and I'd be alone." He said softly.

"Don't ever be afraid of that. You can be afraid of Hannibal Lecter or the dark or Grissom making you eat chocolate covered bugs. But don't ever be afraid that I won't be here. I'm always gonna be here for you Alex. You gotta trust me on that. Nothing can stop me from staying here with you. Wherever you are, I'll be. You're never gonna be alone kid."


	9. Chapter 9

"I thought you said that this could wait until Christmas vacation?" 

Nick sighed, but smiled nontheless. He was sitting beside Alex on the plane that was taking them to Texas. It had taken Nick a little longer than he would have liked to tell his family about him having a kid now and everything. He kept getting distracted from doing so by countless things. His older brother Colin had been the only one he had told right away because Nick was closest with him and trusted him. But he knew he had put it off too long and his family was eager to meet the new addition. And to yell at Nick either for his decision or for waiting so long to tell them.

"Once you meet everyone, you'll understand why this couldn't wait." Nick replied.

"That means they're gonna hate me, doesn't it?" Alex asked. He was extremely nervous about meeting his new family. He had never had a family before, and now he was going to meet a very, very large one.

"They're not gonna hate you. No one's gonna hate you. They're gonna be mad at me, not you."

"Why are they mad at you?"

"Because I waited so long to tell them about you. They like to know everything right away...and I didn't exactly do that."

Alex shrugged. "Well, you could have never told them about me. Then we wouldn't have to go back to Texas like you said I would never have to if I didn't want to and I don't."

Nick turned slightly at looked at Alex. "This is for a completely different reason. I'm not sending you back to live with your mom. I'm taking you to meet your family."

"What if it's a trick to get me to go back?" Alex asked.

"You don't trust me?"

Alex dropped his eyes to his hands, then brought them back up to Nick's eyes. "I trust you. But it's not like it hasn't happened to me before."

"You have a good point. But believe me Alex, I don't really want to go back either. I love my family, but there's a reason why I left Texas and moved to Vegas. And anyway, if I was sending you back to your mom, I wouldn't have come with you and left Maverick with Warrick."

Alex laughed. "Warrick loves Mav. But Mav loves Warrick more."

Nick nodded. "Yeah he does. Now will you relax? Everything's gonna be fine."

* * *

Colin picked Nick and Alex up at the airport. After a short time of walking around looking for each other, Nick finally spotted his older brother. 

"There he is." Nick said, pointing Colin out to Alex.

"He looks like us." Alex observed.

"Well he is my brother." Nick commented. Alex just rolled his eyes playfully and followed his dad over to his new uncle.

Colin Stokes was a little taller than Nick and had tanner skin. His eyes were green, not brown like Nick's. His hair was a shade lighter and a lot shorter than Nick's. He was also more muscular and looked like he spent a lot of time in the gym. As they drew nearer, Alex noticed that he had a scar on his left arm that ran from his wrist to his elbow and ended just before the tan skin disappeared under the black button up shirt Colin was wearing with the sleeves rolled up.

"Woah." Colin greeted his brother and new nephew.

Nick laughed. "That seems to be the general reaction I keep getting."

"Well he just...he is definitely your son." Colin said.

"We already know that." Alex said matter of factly.

"Alex, this is your uncle Colin."

"Nice to meet ya kid." Colin said as he smiled down at Alex.

Alex returned the smile. "Hi." He said shyly and stood close to his dad.

Alex didn't pay attention to what the brothers were saying as they walked to Colin's car. He was looking around him at the large airport and then at all the people and cars once they got out into the parking lot. Last time he had been here he hadn't gotten the chance to look around. Even if he had, he had been too scared to care. But now he was anything but scared and took in his surroundings. Before he knew it they had reached the car and Colin had already helped Nick put the bags in the trunk.

Alex rode silently in the back seat and stared out his window the entire hour long ride back to the ranch. He was mesmerized by all the buildings and people they passed. It was a very hot day out, but in the air conditioned car everything looked perfect. The sky was bright blue with just the right amount of clouds dotting it white. Alex became aware of the swealtering heat again when they got out of the car and back into the sun when they arrived at the ranch.

The buildings and people had been amazing to look at, but the house in front of him was something entirely different. Alex couldn't believe people lived here. When they had turned onto the driveway, Alex thought it was a street until they came up to the house. It was the biggest house Alex had ever seen. The front porch was seperated from the driveway by about fifty feet of perfect green grass. The porch ran all along the front of the house and wrapped around the sides, leading to the back. The dark blue paint looked like it had just been painted on yesterday.

Alex followed Nick and Colin up the front steps and into the house through the big, white front door. They entered the small foyer with a sitting room with chairs and a fireplace to their right, the staircase to the second floor in front of them and a doorway leading off into the dining room. Alex followed Nick into the dining room and then into the kitchen while Colin went upstairs with their bags. From the kitchen they went into the extremely large living room that had windows on three sides and two large glass doors on the far wall that lead onto the back deck. Alex looked out the door and into the vast backyard filled with trees and plants. At the edge of the yard, just before it ended and became woods was a large red barn.

The young boy hadn't even noticed the other people in the living room because he was so occupied with look at everything around him. When he finally noticed that they were there, his nervousness returned and he forgot about all the great things he had just seen. He stood as close as possible to his dad and looked down at the floor.

Colin returned and stood next to his brother for a second before the went over and sat down on the small couch facing everyone else on the leather wrap around couch that was next to an oak door in the corner and stretched across two walls of the living room and surrounded the plasma screen TV and stereo. Everyone was silent for a long time until all five of Nick's sisters spoke at once.

"Woah." They said in unison.

Alex turned and looked up at his dad. "Why does everyone keep saying that?"

Nick laughed and shook his head. "I don't know buddy."

Colin nudged his younger brother. "Introduce everyone so this isn't so awakward."

"Oh...okay." Nick took a deep breath and started at the left of the couch. "Alex, this is my dad, my mom, and my sisters Jen, Kristin, Lauryn, Jill, and Abbey." He said as he pointed each one out.

"Hi." Alex said shyly.

"Hi." Everyone said with big smiles.

Nick's mother, Jillian Stokes, put her hand to her heart and sighed. "He looks exactly like Nicky did when he was young. That is so adorable."

Jen nodded in agreement. "Yeah he does. He could pass off as our little brother."

Bill Stokes seemed less amused as everyone else. "Poncho, can your mother and I speak to you in the other room, please?"

Nick nodded silently and stood from the couch. He followed his parents through the oak door on the other side of the room, which Alex guessed was a study by the desk and large bookcase he saw when the door opened. Then the door closed and the three occupents were out of sight, but could still be heard through the door.

Nick sat down on the big leather chair in the corner of the room that was used for reading. He knew the drill by now. Whenever he or one of his siblings had gotten in trouble, they were brought into the study for a chat with their parents. Nick sat there silently and waited for his father to start.

"Okay...why don't you just give us your side of the story and explain how all this happened." Bill said.

Nick took another deep breath. "Well, when Colin got married, I met Steph because she was friends with Chelsea in high school. We danced a couple times at the wedding and then after...you get the idea."

"You slept with her when you barely knew her." Jillian finished.

"Yeah. But I was pretty drunk and so was she."

Bill shook his head. "That's not a good excuse Nicholas."

Nick knew his father was mad because he called him by his birthname and not the nickname he had gone by since before he could remember. "Look, I know I screwed up."

Jillian nodded in agreement. "Yeah, you did. And now you're taking full responsibility of another life?"

"Yeah, I am. I know you guys think it's a bad idea, but I don't. I know what I did may be looked at as a mistake, but if I could go back I wouldn't change what I did. I'd only change that I didn't know my son was alive until eight years after he was born. Would you have rathered me send him back to live with his mom, who didn't even care about him or take care of him?"

Bill shook his head. "Of course not. But how do you think you can raise a child by yourself?"

A smile formed on Nick's lips. "I had great parents raise me, so I know what to do. And it's not like I'm completely alone. I have Catherine, Warrick, Greg, Sara and even Grissom helping me. I have a good job and make plenty of money and have great friends and family to make sure I don't screw up."

Bill wasn't convinced. "What if you can't handle it, or after a little while don't want to do it anymore?"

"That's not gonna happen. He's my son, I love that kid."

"Your fathers right Nick. It's a lot harder than you think it is." Jillian said.

"I know that. It's gonna be the hardest thing I'm ever gonna have to do. But I know it's gonna be worth it. I respect your opinion and concern, but I'm an adult now and there's nothing you or anyone else can say that will make me change my mind about this."

* * *

Next chapter should be up soon. Sorry for any confusion, but this is going to be a long story that covers Alex growing up with Nick.

Thanks for the reviews, and any suggestions are welcomed.


	10. Chapter 10

A whole year had passed since Alex had first arrived in Las Vegas to live with his father. A lot had happened in that time, but nothing extremely exciting. Alex enrolled in school and was doing very well. His teacher had nothing but good things to say about him, and his grades just backed that up. He liked school and it showed in how hard he worked and the excellent grades he got. 

Nick thought Alex deserved a little vacation, and since his birthday was only a week away he had arranged for them to go somewhere he knew his son would love to for his tenth birthday.

"Hey Alex." Nick said as he walked into the house after work.

Alex was on the couch watching a movie. "Hi dad, what's up?"

"Not too much." Nick sat down on the couch and turned the TV off. "I have a surprise for you for your birthday."

"But it's not for another week, and I've never gotten presents before."

Nick nodded. "Exactly. So that's why this year...actually, I'm not gonna tell you. Go in my top drawer of my bureau and you'll see it right away. Your present is right on top, go grab it."

Alex excitedly hopped off the couch and ran into his dad's room. He quickly found what he was meant to get and frowned in confusion. Then when he figured out what it was, he smiled widely and ran back out into the living room. He came to a stop in front of Nick, but stared down at what was in his hands.

"Are we really going to Fenway Park?" Alex asked, excitement in his voice.

Nick nodded again. "Yes we are. The game is even on your birthday, and guess who they're playing?"

Alex looked down at the tickets in his hands and became even more excited, which Nick had thought would be impossible. "The Yankees?!? That's so awesome!"

Nick laughed. "Yeah it is. It'll be a great view of the game too from the Monster seats."

Alex's jaw dropped. "We're sitting in the Monster seats?" Nick nodded. "Wow. This is gonna be so awesome...wait, there's three tickets. Is Warrick coming too?"

"Yeah, he took work off too and decided to join in."

"This is gonna be so much fun, thank you so much. So when do we leave?"

"The game is on a Wednesday, and since I haven' been to Boston in a long time, we can leave Sunday and stay till Thursday if you don't mind missing that much school."

Alex quickly shook his head. "No I don't care at all. I'll make up all the work I promise."

Just then, the door opened and Warrick walked into the house and joined Nick and Alex in the living room. Before he could say anything at all, Alex excitedly told him all about his present and what they got to do with a huge smile still on his face.

"It's definitely gonna be fun kid." Warrick said, smiling as well. "As long as you don't fall off the Green Monster."

"I won't if you don't push me." Alex countered.

Nick just laughed and shook his head as Alex ran off into his room to start packing already. "Don't lose those tickets Alex." He yelled after his son, who probably didn't hear him.

"So how did you come up with this idea anyway?" Warrick asked, turning to his best friend.

Nick shrugged. "It wasn't too hard. He loves baseball and the Red Sox, and he's never gotten a present for his birthday in his life."

"Lauryn gave you the idea, didn't she?" Warrick said, referring to one of Nick's older sisters.

Nick nodded. "Yeah. Well kind of. She lives out there and thought it'd be a good idea. Which it is."

Warrick laughed. "You're not too stealthy Stokes."

"I don't have to be. Who cares, he's gonna have a great time and that's all that matters."

Warrick smiled. "You have no idea what a great dad you are Nick. Alex is luckier than he realizes."

* * *

I am extremely sorry for the amount of time it took me to upload this awfuly short chapter. My computer needed to be fixed and then I was away on vacation. Anyway, the next chapter will definitely be much, much longer and better. This is just an introduction into it. I hope you're still enjoying it and will continue to read and review. Thanks ) 


	11. Chapter 11

Alex was unable to contain his excitement once they got on the plane headed for Boston. He was seated in between Nick and Warrick on the left side of plane. They had their own aisle next to the windows. Nick was sitting next to the window while Warrick was next to the aisle. Both men were smiling at Alex's anxiousness and were happy to see he was already having fun. 

"How long until we get there?" He asked before the plane had even taken off.

"It's gonna be like a four hour flight. Then we have to take a cab to the hotel and order pizza or something. The game isn't until Wednesday Alex, so relax a little."

Alex sighed. "I know but it's still gonna be fun to go to Boston. I've never been anywhere other than Texas and Vegas. Is Boston nice?"

"You'll see soon enough." Warrick answered, smirking at the little kid sitting next to him.

The plane finally took off at three o'clock in the afternoon. Alex asked more questions about anything he could think of to keep himself occupied. Just as that was starting to wear thin, the on flight movie began. It was some old movie with Kevin Costner in it that neither Nick nor Warrick had seen before. Alex half paid attention to it for a little while before falling asleep half way through it. He slept the entire rest of the flight and was finally woken up by his dad when they landed at Logan Airport in Boston.

"Alex wake up, we're here." Nick said as he shook Alex's shoulder.

Alex's eyes snapped open and he practically jumped out of his seat. He was hyper and excited for about an hour before he started to get tired again. By the time they had gotten off the plane, gotten all their luggage, waved down a cab and then checked into their hotel, Alex was exhausted again. They drove by Fenway Park on the way to the hotel and Alex had stared out the window at the bright lights in and surrounding the park.

Once they got into their hotel room, Alex collapsed onto the couch in the corner by the TV. It took him a second to realize that this was no ordinary hotel room, and that he was on a couch in front of the biggest TV he had ever seen.

"Wow. Is this really our room?" He asked.

Nick nodded. "Yeah. It's a suite I guess. Pretty cool huh?"

"It's awesome. I didn't know they had hotel rooms like this. What kind of hotel room has its own living room?"

"A good one." Warrick answered with a laugh. He sank down into the recliner and turned his attention to Nick. "Wanna order that pizza now man? I'm starving."

* * *

Alex would easily admit that the two days leading up to the game that he had spent wandering around Boston with his dad and Warrick were extremely fun. They went to Pizzeria Regina, one of the best pizza places around, and then went to every store in Faneuil Hall. All of that was really fun, but nothing compared to what they were doing right now.

Alex stared out over Fenway Park lit up brightly in front of him. He was no longer paying attention to the players because it was the Yankees turn for batting practice. He couldn't believe the sight in front of him. All the rows of seats surrounded by the bright lights. The grass couldn't have been greener and the diamond looked nothing less than perfect. He couldn't believe they were really there.

"This is so awesome." Alex said, thinking out loud.

"Yeah it's pretty cool isn't it?" Warrick agreed.

Their seats were perfect: front row on top of the Green Monster. Doesn't get much better than that. They got to see a great game as well. Alex was even lucky enough to end up catching a home run hit by his favorite player on the Red Sox, Jason Varitek. Before they had gotten into the park Nick had bought Alex a Varitek t-shirt and a Red Sox hat to go with it. To top it all off, the Sox pulled off the victory over their rivals, ending a perfect night.

The game got out late, and the boys didn't make it back to their hotel until close to midnight. Alex was asleep as soon as they got back, and wasn't happy at all about having to get up early to catch their flight back to Vegas. Nick and Warrick both had to work, so they had to get back as soon as possible.

Despite having to wake up early to go home, Alex was still estatic when they got back to Vegas. He excitedly told Catherine, Greg and anyone else at the lab who would listen all about their trip and how much fun it was. They all listened intently and smiled at Alex's excitement. When he was done telling them everything, Alex and Greg took off to the break room to play video games.

"Sounds like he might have had fun." Catherine said, smiling at both Nick and Warrick.

"We all did, it was awesome." Nick said, smiling as well.

Catherine turned her head and looked into the break room, her smile widening when she saw Greg helplessly trying to beat Alex in some video game they were always playing. "I know you two are gonna make fun of me for being 'too motherly' when I say this, but it's so great that he has everyone around that he does. He's such a great kid, he deserves it."


	12. Chapter 12

Another year and come and past. Alex was out of school for the summer and was doing what most ten-year-olds do; playing basketball, baseball, soccer, and anything else he could think of doing. His favorite thing to do was go to the lab with his dad and watch everyone working. Catherine's daughter Lindsey was theretoo in the summer sometimes and she was always fun to hang out with even though she was four years older than him. 

After beating Greg in home run derby in his backyard for the third time, Alex decided to let Warrick take his place and went inside to find what his dad was doing. He couldn't find him anywhere in the house and was about to give up and go back outside when he heard a curse word Catherine told him he couldn't repeat come from the garage. Alex went inside and was confused upon still not seeing his dad, but then saw his legs sticking out from under Greg's car.

"What are you doing?" Alex asked as he layed on his stomach on the concrete and looked under the car at Nick.

"Trying to fix Greg's car, but I have no idea what he did to mess it up this bad."

Alex moved a little closer. "You know how to fix cars?"

Nick nodded. "Yeah, my brother taught me. Think you could help me out?" Nick asked.

Alex quickly got up and layed back down underneath the car next to his dad. "I can try, but I don't really know what to do either. What are you trying to fix?"

Nick shrugged. "I don't really know. Greg said it squeeks when he turns, so I figured it was the steering column but there's nothing wrong with it. His brakes are fine. What do you think we should do?"

"Ummm...but oil on it somewhere?"

"I already did that. Well, not oil. I changed the steering fluid. And apparently that didn't work."

They heard the garage door open and two sets of footsteps enter. "Did you fix it yet?" Greg asked.

"How can I fix it when there's nothing wrong with it?" Nick replied.

"All I know is it squeeks and it didn't do that before."

"Did you see a mouse anywhere?" Nick asked Alex.

Alex laughed again. "No." He said, shaking his head. "Can we put one in it though? That'd explain the squeeking."

"Really funny." Greg said sarcastically. "Warrick said you were awesome at fixing cars."

"Yeah, when there's something wrong with them." Warrick said with a laugh.

Nick thought for a second before coming up with another idea. "Alex, hand me that wrench by your knee."

"What are you doing?" Greg asked.

"Relax Einstein." Alex watched as Nick adjusted something, tightened something else and then rolled out from under the car. Alex followed suit, standing up and brushing himself off. "Try it now."

Greg pulled his keys out of his jeans and got in his car. He started it, pulled it out of the garage and disappeared down the street. He came back a few minutes later, but left the car out in the driveway. He got out, looking pleased and surprised.

"It's fine now. What did you do?" He asked.

"Tightened the tilt column a little. I bet you hit too many pot holes."

"You're pretty pathetic Sanders." Warrick said. "You need Nicky to fix your car, and Alex just beat you three times in home run derby. You're three times his age man."

Greg shook his head. "I don't see where you're going with this at all."

"I think we have to have another game for Greg to try and regain his dignity from a ten-year-old." Warrick said, tossing Greg the wiffle ball.

"Oh it's on like Donkey Kong." Greg said, leading the pack out to the backyard.

"I beat you in that too." Alex said thoughtfully.

Nick and Warrick laughed, and Greg couldn't hold back his smile. They got into the backyard and got right into the game. They were about halfway done when Catherine and Grissom showed up with enough food to feed a small town. They cooked the hamburges and hot dogs on the grill while the others finshed their game, then they all sat down to eat together.

"Did you two finish that Bryiar case yet?" Grissom asked Nick and Warrick.

"Yeah, last shift. Hodges finally ID'd that stuff Nick found on the victims wrist as food coloring on the duct tape. The husband had been helping the kid with a science project and had it all over his hands, and then he admitted to it." Warrick explained.

"Easier than our case." Catherine muttered. "Absolutely no evidence of any kind on or near the body. Doc still can't figure out COD."

"Maybe he drowned in the desert." Warrick said, poking fun at Nick.

"That one did drown in the desert. Except it was rain water and not pool water. It was the husband's fault too because he changed the map."

Catherine nodded slowly. "Yeah, that's true...but what about the scuba diver in the tree myth you thought was true?"

Nick held up his hands. "I still think that could happen. The exploding missile tank was harder to prove than my theory."

"Nick, you should start keeping some of these theories to yourself. You watch the History Channel too much." Grissom said as he picked up another hot dog.

Nick laughed. "That's a good point." He was just about to make fun of Greg when he heard the doorbell ring from inside the house. He got up and went into the house, crossing the living room and over to the front door.

He was not expecting Stephanie Jacobs to be standing on his front porch.

"Hi Nick." She said cheerfully.

Nick shook his head. "You're not supposed to be here...how did you find out where I live?"

"It wasn't too hard." Her cheerful tone was now gone. "I know there's a TRO and everything, I just wanted to see Alex. He's my son too."

"Yeah, but you wanted nothing to do with him. And I don't trust you."

Steph stepped into the house and closed the door behind her without invitation. "You don't trust _me_? I seem to remember you being the one getting me pregnant and leaving me with that kid!"

Nick rolled his eyes. "Last time I checked, it takes two people to have sex."

"Yeah? And when was the last time you checked?" Steph said mockingly.

She made a good point, so Nick didn't say anything. He just stood there, unsure of what to do. It wasn't too long before he heard the back door open, followed by Catherine and Alex's voices in the kitchen. Nick sighed when he heard them approaching and turned to face Catherine when she stopped and stood next to him.

"You're with _her_ now?" Steph said. She laughed humorlessly. "What a step down..."

Catherine looked at Nick, then back at Steph. "And who are you exactly?"

"Mom." Alex said in disbelief.

Steph looked down at him, a glare crossing her face. "You. You little son of a bitch. You ruined my life!"

Steph raised her hand to slap Alex, but Nick grabbed him and pulled his son to stand behind him. Steph instead redirected her hand and reached to slap Nick, but he moved out of the way in time. He pushed Alex back farther into the house before Catherine gently grabbed Alex's shoulder and brought him back out into the backyard.

"Just get out of here." Nick said.

"Why? So you can go back to screwing her?"

"I'm not sleeping with her. Why do you care anyway? You hate me so it shouldn't matter."

"You're right, I do hate you. I thought you were such a nice guy when I met you. I wasn't even drunk when I slept with you. Then you left."

Nick threw up his hands. "What was I supposed to do? You never told me. If you had told me, I would have helped you out however you wanted. That's your fault, not mine. You don't wanna have anything to do with him so just leave him alone. It's not his fault either."

"You won't let me have anything to do with him."

"You sent him up here to get him away from you. If you wanted to be in his life I would let you but I can't because you only want to hurt him. I'm not gonna let you hurt him."

With absolutely perfect timing, Brass strolled in through the front door. He took one look at Nick before turning to Stephanie. "Is there a problem Miss Jacobs?"

She shook her head. "Not if you don't consider him killing my boyfriend and taking my kid a problem." She hissed before storming out, slamming the door behind her.

Nick sighed heavily. "Good timing man."

Brass nodded in agreement. "It's what I do. I just don't get how someone like you attracts someone so crazy. Thank God Alex is like your little clone and nothing like her."

"Yeah, that's definitely for the best."

The two men went out into the backyard, greeted by worried expressions on everyone's faces. Alex was sitting in between Warrick and Catherine and was currently engaged in a tactical food fight with Greg and Grissom. But they stopped when they noticed Nick and Brass had come back, which only happened because Greg accidentally hit Brass with a pieace of bread.

"Everything alright man?" Warrick asked.

Nick nodded. "Yeah, it's fine. Brass came to the rescue and she left."

"Why did she even come?" Alex asked.

"I don't know pal. To yell at me more I guess. Don't worry about it, everything's okay now." He sat down next to Catherine, who was still looking at him worriedly.

"You sure you're okay?" She asked.

Nick smiled. "I'm fine, stop worrying."

Catherine accepted that and everyone went back to just sitting around and enjoying each other's company. Grissom, Greg and Alex's food fight expanded to the yard, and everyone else watched them and made comments about how Greg was trying to cheat and still losing and how Grissom seemed to be a pro at food fights.

Nick just hoped that everything was going to stay this perfect for as long as possible.

* * *

I am very sorry for the amount of time it takes me to update. My computer is not working as well as it should be and I've been busy with basketball and summer work for classes. I apologize and promise it will improve.

Thanks for the reviews, they mean a lot and keep me going. Any suggestions are more than welcome.


	13. Chapter 13

Catherine should have known better than to leave Alex and Greg alone in the break room. But she hadn't been left with much of a choice and knew that Grissom or Warrick wouldn't have been an enforcer either. Both of them would have joined in with anything the other two were doing. Nick and Sara were out of the lab, so Catherine had been left with no alternative. She still should have known better, though. 

When she walked back in, Alex was spinning Greg around in the chair as fast as he could. Greg had his eyes closed tightly and Alex was smiling widely as he continued to spin the ex-lab rat around and around in cirlces. For some unknown reason, Alex stopped spinning the chair and grabbed the arm of it, jerking Greg to a stop and causing him to fall out of the chair and onto the floor. The ten-year-old laughed hysterically before looking up and finally seeing Catherine had come back.

"It was his idea." He said, pointing down at Greg, who was laying on the floor on his stomach.

Catherine sighed. "That doesn't surprise me at all."

She sat down at the table next to Alex, who resumed doing his homework like he had promised he would get finished before his dad got back from the field. He whisked right through all of it and was almost done with his math when Nick and Warrick walked into the break room, taking seats at the table.

"I would have finished if Greg hadn't made me spin him in the chair." Alex said before anyone asked him anything.

"I did not." Greg said, drawing attention to the fact that he was still on the floor. "I suggested it, you carried out my suggestion."

"It's still your fault." Alex said before he went back to finshing his math.

Nick shook his head slowly and looked down at Greg. "Sara needs you in the layout room. You're on with us now because we have so much evidence we need to get processed. Oh, and you might have to go out to the crime scene too. We were kinda rushed and need to make sure we didn't miss anything."

Greg pulled himself up off the floor, swaying on his feet slightly. "Okay. That's better than Alex spinning me to death I guess." He said as he walked by Alex and pushed him slightly before running out of the break room.

"Alex, take a break from your homework." Nick said as he reached into his jeans' pocket, pulling out a few dollars. "Here, go get some candy and a soda. Don't let Greg see you though, he'll steal it all."

Alex didn't protest the distraction his dad was giving him from finishing his homework. He took the money and promptly left the break room, taking the long route to the machines so he could pass by Hodges' lab and try to annoy the trace tech. He always succeeded in doing so, although Hodges never minded in the slightest.

Noticing that Nick had clearly gotten rid of Greg and Alex on purpose, Warrick was curious as to why. He could tell just by looking at his best friend that something was on his mind. He noticed Nick had some paperwork in front of him that didn't look like it was for a case. He didn't have much more time to think though because Catherine spoke up.

"What's up Nicky?" She asked, thinking the same as Warrick.

"Remember when Stephanie showed up at my house a couple months ago?" Nick said.

Catherine nodded. "Yeah, and she thought we were dating."

Nick laughed. "Yeah. Well that, for some reason, got me thinking that if something ever happened to me, I don't want Alex to end up being sent back to live with her. She's still his mother even though she may or may not be the devil as well."

"There's still a restraining order on her though." Warrick said.

"Yeah, but if I died, she's still his parent." Nick explained.

"That sucks." Catherine said softly. "But what's your point?"

"Alex doesn't have any godparents because he was never baptised or anything. Steph never bothered with anything else because she just didn't care what would happen to him. So I was wondering if you guys would be his...guardians I guess you'd call it. If anything happened to me, you'd be his legal guardians."

Warrick and Catherine were both only slightly surprised at this. They had both felt close to Alex immediatly because of how close they are with Nick. Neither one would hesitate to help them in any way if they ever needed. Both of them understood that this was very important and Nick didn't chose them for no reason, especially Catherine as she had a child herself.

After barely a pause at all, the responded in unison with, "Of course we will."

"Really?" Nick asked. He wasn't surprised they had agreed, but wanted to make sure they were positive.

"Absolutely." Warrick replied. "It sucks thinking about it, but if something did happen to you, the last thing we would want is for Alex to have to deal with not only that, but having to go back to Texas with her. As decent human beings, we can't let that happen."

"Exactly." Catherine agreed. "So enough with the chit chat. Give us the papers, we'll sign anything we need to."

Nick smiled as he handed his two best friends the paperwork. All they did was scan for where they had to sign their names and give any other information that was required without even stopping to think. They had just finished handing the papers back to Nick when Alex came bounding back into the break room with a Twix in one hand and a Cherry Coke in the other.

"You're gonna be up all night." Catherine said when she saw Alex's choices.

"I will be anyway." Alex said. "I watched 'Halloween' last night. I think Michael Myers lives down the street from me."

Warrick laughed. "Why do you watch so many scary movies if they scare the hell out of you all the time?"

Alex shrugged. "Because it's fun. And dad makes me."

"Nick!" Catherine said accusingly.

"I don't make him." Nick said, trying to defend himself. "I ask him if he wants to watch one, and he always says yes. I just pick all the good ones."

"Oh yeah." Alex said as he rolled his eyes. " 'The Hills Have Eyes' was awesome." He said sarcastically.

"That wasn't my idea. That was all Greg. I only like scary movies now because you forced me to watch so many of them after football games and stuff." Nick said, pointing at Warrick.

"Scary movies are the best kind. It builds character." Warrick said with a laugh.

"They do not." Alex argued. "They scare the hell out of you and make you not want to leave your house on Halloween."

"Alex, don't swear." Catherine scolded. "And you two, stop swearing so much. He's gonna end up being just like the two of you."

Nick and Warrick exhanged amused glances. "You say that like it's a bad thing." Nick said. "It could be worse. I could be a drug dealer that lives on the streets in a cardboard box and have a pet raccoon named Sparky."

Alex laughed. "Yeah, I have to agree that that would be worse than them swearing all the time. I don't even swear that bad. Hell is a place anyway."

Grissom walked into the break room and sat down at the table, his face hidden behind his latest crossword puzzle.

"Hey Grissom, do you ever swear?" Alex asked.

"Every damn day." Grissom replied without looking up from his paper.

Alex turned to Catherine. "See? It's not so bad. I bet you swear a lot too."

"I seem to remember you saying a very bad one once before Catherine." Warrick said, smiling evilly.

"Keep what you two do behind closed doors to yourselves if you don't mind." Nick said, eliciting a laugh from Grissom.

"Funny Nick." Warrick said, shaking his head at the Texan. "No, this was when-" He stopped suddenly when he realized who was in the room.

Catherine knew what Warrick was talking about. He was referring to when Nick had been kidnapped and buried alive. Warrick had stopped because Alex had no knowledge of said events. They had all agreed that it would be a better idea to wait until Alex was a little older before he was told what had happened.

Alex didn't catch on to the tension in the room that had built up. "When did he swear?" He asked excitedly.

"Nick doesn't know this because he was at a conference. We were looking for something other than what we found and weren't too happy about it. It was a pretty important case." Warrick explained.

Nick and Grissom both caught on to what Warrick was actually talking about. The supervisor lowered his paper and looked up at Nick, who looked like he had no idea what to say. Which he didn't.

"That was under totally different circumstances." Catherine said. "I'm pretty sure everyone swore that night."

Nick nodded. "I know I definitely did." He said, speaking before he thought it through.

"How do you know that?" Alex asked. "You weren't there."

Nick swore, but to himself. "I remember the conference I was at." He said, and that satisfied Alex.

"What do you guys want for diner?" Catherine asked, quickly changing subjects.

Grissom, Alex, Warrick and Nick all said different things at once, making it impossible for Catherine to understand what they had said. She was just about to make her own suggestion when Brass walked in with Sara and Greg.

"I just drove by Olive Garden on my way here and could really go for some of those bread sticks and salad. You guys in?" Brass asked.

Everyone unamiously agreed to that idea and started filing out of the break room towards the parking lot. Lindsey had just been dropped off by Catherine's mother, so it was going to be the entire gang for diner. Alex raced to the car, beating Greg out for the front seat. They all managed to pile into one Denali, which Warrick forced Nick to drive.

Before long they were all seated and waiting for their meals, not caring how long it took because they were all together.

* * *

Sorry it takes so long to update. I promise it'll improve as Alex gets older, and more action will be brought to the chapters.

Thanks for the reviews and hope you all continue to read.


	14. Chapter 14

Alex pretended he was watching TV, but was really listening to his dad's conversation in the kitchen. Nick was on the phone with his older sister Lauryn, and whatever they were talking about was making him mad. Alex wasn't quite sure what was going on, but he knew it had something to do with his uncle Colin and his aunt Chelsea. His curiosity took over and caused Alex to competely forget about the TV and fully turn around and look at his dad in the kitchen. It was hard to hear because Nick's back was to him, but that just made Alex listen more intently and want to know what was going on more.

He was now eleven-years-old, but instead of being in sixth grade, he was in seventh and a year younger than everyone else. Despite that, he was the smartest kid in all of his classes and never seemed to have any homework because he always whipped right through it. He probably would have been in his room doing it right now though if it wasn't spring break, but luckily it was so he could eavesdrop on his dad's conversation. He didn't even try to pretend that he hadn't been listening when Nick hung up. His dad turned around and saw he was watching, so he came into the living room and sank into the couch next to Alex.

"What's wrong?" Alex asked.

Nick shook his head. "Nothing, don't worry about it."

"You know that just makes me want to know more. Is uncle Colin and aunt Chelsea okay?"

Nick sighed. "I guess you'll find out sooner or later from Erik anyway..."

Alex smiled and nodded in agreement. His older cousin Erik was Colin and Chelsea's son. He was two years older than Alex, and even though they lived far away, they were very close. Erik lived all the way out in Chicago, but still managed to keep in touch.

"So what's wrong?" Alex asked again.

Nick rubbed the back of his neck. "Uncle Colin and aunt Chelsea are going to get divorced."

"Why? Do they hate each other like you and mom do?"

Nick shook his head. "No. It's nothing like that. It's for a different reason, and they're not fighting or anything. They're just more like friends, like me and Catherine are."

Alex nodded. "So who's Erik going to live with?"

"Chelsea, but only until Colin gets a new job and his own place close to her in Chicago."

"Why does he need a new job?"

Nick sighed again, not wanting to explan to his kid why his brother had gotten fired because he knew he wouldn't understand. "He wants a different career. He's taking a little vacation for a little while though and is going to come out and stay with us."

"Really?" Alex asked, getting excited.

"Yeah, and since Erik's on vacation too he's gonna come out for a little while with Colin."

That made Alex even happier. "That's awesome. When are they coming?"

"They'll be here tomorrow night." Nick said, glad that Alex was distracted for a little while so he wouldn't ask any more questions about what was going on with Colin.

-

Nick returned home from dropping Erik and Alex off at the movies to find his older brother Colin sitting on the couch with what had to be his fourth or fifth beer bottle in his hands. Nick sighed as he walked over to him, took the bottle away and set it down on the table. He sat down next to his brother, who was looking down at the floor instead of meeting Nick's gaze.

"I'm surprised no one else hates me besides Abbey her psycho husband Jesse." Colin mumbled.

"Why would we hate you man? It's not as big of a deal as everyone else is making it out to be. Chelsea understands and doesn't hate you for it, and no one else does either. Does Erik know?

Colin shook his head. "He knows that we're getting divorced, but not that I'm gay. I don't think he would be too happy to hear that anyway. The divorce is gonna be hard enough, I'll wait on the other part till later."

"He's not gonna hate you for it or anything."

"I hope not." Colin sighed.

Nick squeezed his brother's shoulder reassuringly. "He won't, don't worry about it. Everything's gonna be okay, alright?"

Colin nodded weakly. "Yeah, whatever you say little bro. Thanks for everything you're doing for me too, it means a lot."

"I know." Nick said with a smile as he got up and went in to the kitchen grabbing the phone. That's why I'm letting you pay for the chinese food we're getting for tonight. Erik still likes egg rolls, right?"

-

"What the hell is all this?" Warrick asked almost as soon as they pulled onto Nick's street. They could see all the way down to his house, and parked outside were two very large trucks with a lot of wood on them and a smaller van. Dozens of guys were walking to and from the trucks from the backyard.

Nick shrugged. "I have no idea. But I bet it was Alex's idea."

Nick had to park across the street from his house where Alex's best friend Zach Tenser lives. Zach's father Mike was standing in his front yard watching the apparent construction and walked up to Nick when he saw him pull up. The two fathers had become friends because of the close relationship between their sons. On nights Nick was working later than usual or had to pull a double, Alex would spend the night over at Zach's and would go there after school if he had to. Mike Tenser was a single dad too, and they did whatever they could to help each other out.

"Pleae tell me Alex told you about this." Mike said.

Nick shook his head. "No, he failed to mention this to me. But I have a feeling Colin didn't think it was necessary. Do you know what's going on?"

Mike sighed. "You probably wouldn't believe me if I told you."

The three men walked around to the back of Nick's house where they were met with their explanation. Half constrcucted in the back of the yard was a ten foot high wooden halfpipe. Alex, Zach, Erik and Colin were sitting on the grass in front of where it was being built, watching the men working. Alex, Zach and Erik's skateboards were laying on the grass next to them, waiting to be able to be used on the new toy they were getting.

Mike, Nick and Warrick came to a stop behind where the other four were sitting patiently. They didn't seem to notice anyone else had joined them and remained silent in their anticipation. After a few brief moments of saying nothing, Nick spoke up.

"What the hell is going on?" He asked.

All four of the people sitting on the grass turned around and saw the three newcomers. Alex was about to ramble off an explanation, but Colin beat him to it.

"You said to get him whatever he wanted for his birthday, right?"

Nick nodded. "Yeah...but I was thinking more along the lines of a video game or something. You brought the video game to my backyard."

"Yeah, but it's awesome." Alex reasoned, not surprising coming from an eleven-year-old.

Colin stood up next to his younger brother. "Don't worry Nick, it's fine. These guys are pros at this, it's completely safe. They build professional ones for the X-Games and stuff, and are the guys that put the half pipe in at the skate park you guys let Alex and Zach go to."

"I honestly don't care, just as long as they don't kill themselves on it."

"Don't worry uncle Nick." Erik said as he stood as well. "It's fine."

"I suppose you're the one to thank for this, seeing as how you got these two into skateboarding in the first place." Nick said.

"Yeah, but Greg helped me too. I couldn't help it, they're naturals." Erik said with a smile.

Mike sighed. "Well there's good news. But I guess it's better they can do it here instead of at the skate park where if they got hurt they'd wouldn't tell anyone because they wouldn't want to get in trouble for telling each other to do something stupid."

Nick nodded agreement. "That's very true. Just be careful guys, okay?"

"We will." Alex, Zach and Erik said in unison.

"Well that makes me feel better." Warrick said, smiling at Nick and Mike.

"A beer would make me feel better." Nick mumbled.

Nick and Colin went into the house and returned with a couple coolers full of beer, sharing with Mike and Warrick as well as all the workers building the half pipe for the kids.

"That's just what you want Nicky." Erik said. "Drunk people building your kid's half pipe."

Nick shrugged. "Better than my drunk kid skating on the half pipe."

"I second that." Mike said.

It wasn't too much longer before the half pipe was up and running and the boys were on it, having a blast. Nick, Warrick, Colin and Mike sat in the yard and watched them, impressed at how good they actually were. That did very little to ease their nerves though, and every time one of them fell they all cringed, fearing for the worst.

"Thank God we have alcohol, or this would be unbearble." Colin said, taking on the same mindset at Nick and Mike.

"Yeah." Warrick agreed. "Don't tell Catherine about this either. She'll kill all of us."

They all laughed and went back to watching the kids skateboard back and forth for hours, all of them happy for some relaxation and normacly for once. Well, as close to normal as it can get when you have a half pipe in your backyard. 


	15. Chapter 15

Alex sat completely still and didn't make a sound in hopes that no one would see him and he would be left alone. He stared down at his feet dangling above the floor because he thought if he didn't look at anyone, they wouldn't look at him. The last time he had been sitting on the couch where he was right now he had been sitting with his dad and his uncle Colin when he had come to meet his grandparents and aunts. But now he was sitting all by himself because his dad was in the other room with Cisco and Chelsea and uncle Colin was the reason they were all there. 

Colin died.

Alex ignored the mass amounts of people in the living room. It was all of his dad's sisters, their husbands and all their kids. All the girls were crying on their husband's shoulders and were passing around pictures of Colin when he was younger and more recent ones, some of which Alex were in with Nick. Before he had chosen to go invisible, Alex had been sitting with his gandmother while she told him stories about when his dad and Colin were younger and all the trouble they got themselves in to. They were always coming up with ways to entertain themselves, and most of the time those ways ended up in something being broken. Alex laughed slightly at some of them because he was able to clearly picture his dad and Colin doing those things, even now.

Then his grandmother had to go talk to Jill, so he was left alone where he was now. He was starting to get really worried because everyone else seemed to know what had happened, but not him. All his dad had told him was that Colin had had an accident and had died. Alex could tell there was more to it than that, but for some reason he wasn't told exactly what. Before they had left, they brought Maverick over to Zach's house so they could take care of him while they were gone. Alex and Zach were in Zach's room for a little while and could hear their dads talking in the kitchen, but all they could figure out was whatever happened was bad because Mike kept saying "I'm so sorry Nick."

Alex was sick of being alone and not knowing what was going on. He went in to the other room to see his dad, but saw he was sitting with Chelsea who couldn't seem to stop crying. Alex didn't think it was fair that everyone else in the other room that was crying had a husband to lean on, but Chelsea didn't. Instead of bothering them, Alex went throught he kitchen and upstairs, away from all the people. He went into the guest room across from his dad's old bedroom, where he found Erik sitting on the bed.

When they came to their grandparents ranch for holidays and visits, Alex and Erik shared this guest room every time. They got along perfectly each time and never fought once, which was somewhat amazing to everyone else. All those times they had hung out in this room it had been fun, but now it was the opposite. Erik was sitting on the edge of the bed, his eyes red from crying. He looked up when he heard Alex come in and smiled sadly as his little cousin.

"Hi Alex." He said softly.

They hadn't seen each other since they had arrived at the ranch because there were so many people there and it was overwhelming at first, but now they were both glad that they got away from all of it and were being left alone in the peace and quiet of their guest room.

"Hi." Alex said as he crossed the room and sat down next to Erik on the bed. "Are you doing okay?" He asked.

Erik shrugged. "Better than my mom I guess. I feel bad I left her down there." He said, looking at the door.

"My dad's down there with her, and Cisco too. She was still crying, but she isn't alone."

Erik nodded slowly. "That's good. How's everyone else?"

"All the girls are crying and all the guys are sitting with them. They all look sad too. The only one I talked to was grandma, and she didn't seem too bad." Alex said.

"I guess it hasn't really hit her yet, or she cried so much yesterday that she's too tired to today." Erik sighed. "This fucking sucks man."

Even though Erik was two years older than Alex, he knew his younger cousin was mature enough for him to swear in front of, especially seeing as how Alex swore sometimes himself. Erik had just recently turned fourteen the previous week, so he would be three years older than Alex for a couple months until he turned twelve. Despite the age, the two cousins were so close when they were together and looked enough alike that they could pass for twins, and had been mistaken for just that before at a restaurant.

Alex knew that this was extremely hard on Erik, especially since his parents had just got divorced not too long ago, and then his dad died a week after his birthday. He had been worried that Erik would have been in much worse shape than he was right now though. Aside from his bloodshot eyes, he looked pretty normal. He looked like he hadn't slept last night, but other than that he was okay physically.

The boys were quiet for a little while before Erik spoke again. "You don't know what happened, do you?" He asked.

Alex shook his head. "No, my dad just told me he had an accident or something. I could tell he was lying, but there must have been a reason for why he didn't want to tell me the truth."

"He probably didn't wanna make it worse." Erik said. He sighed heavily. "Ya know how my parents got divroced?"

"Yeah."

"Well, that was because my dad was gay. He got fired from his job for it too. My mom didn't hate him or anything for it, they had always been better friends anyway, and they both wanted to get separated. Then he was in Chicago, looking for a job and an apartment and these kids just outta college who knew he was gay cornered him in an alley and killed him." Erik said, his voice dropping to almost a whisper.

Alex gaped in shock. "What?" He asked in disbelief.

"They did internships where he used to work and knew he was gay and they hated gay people...so they killed him. And they all got away with it because the police said there wasn't enough evidence or some bullshit like that."

Alex shook his head. "But I thought it was okay to be gay. I didn't think people were still mad about stuff like that."

"Not everyone is. There's still people like that, just like there's still racists. They think they can do whatever they want because they think their way of life is right. It is okay to be gay, but my dad still died because of it."

Alex could see the sadness mixed in with anger in Erik's green eyes. He felt the heaviness in his heart get worse because of what he had just found out. He couldn't understand how someone could think that that was the right thing to do, and how the police could not care and just give up. They should try harder to find more evidence instead of letting them get away with murder. It was then - sitting next to Erik on the bed, seeing how his cousin felt and feeling awful himself - that Alex decided that he didn't ever want to be a policemen. He was so mad that they could just do nothing that he actually hated them and the whole "justice" system from then on, despite his dad's profession.

They boys had fallen into a silence again. They sat there, not saying anything for fifteen minutes before Jay walked in and silently closed the door behind him before taking the chair from the desk and sitting in it next to the bed. Jay was Lauyrn's son and the only other boy in all of the cousins they had. He was also the only other only child, just like Erik and Alex. He was eighteen, but even though he was a lot older than Erik and Alex he still always hung out with them when they were at the ranch and was never mean to them because they were younger. He acted like their older brother and loved spending time with them because they always had so much fun.

Now he was especially worried about them, especially Erik. "How are you guys holding up?"

"Okay I guess." Erik answered. "I told Alex what really happened to my dad."

Jay seemed to be taken back by that for a second, but then he nodded slightly. "I didn't know how much either of you knew. I'm really sorry man." He said softly.

"Was there any other reason for them killing him other than that he was gay?" Erik asked.

Jay shook his head slowly. "I don't think so buddy. Some people just don't understand things like this and are too consumed by their hate to realize that they're human beings too. What happened was terrible, but you can't let what people are gonna say get to you."

Erik frowned. "What are they gonna say?"

"I don't know for sure, but people always talk and say stupid things. No matter what they say, don't listen to them okay?"

Erik nodded. "Okay. Is everyone downstairs still crying?"

"Yeah, once my mom came in they all started back up again. Everyone's here now though so it should calm down soon. Cisco said that they're gonna get food soon so that no one goes hungry cuz a lot of people have been here for a while. My dad's in with uncle Nick and Cisco with your mom."

Jay's dad, Erik and Alex's uncle Chris, had been closest with Colin and Nick out of the rest of the family. Nick, Colin and Lauryn had all been really close, resulting in them staying close as they got older. Erik was happy to know that Nick and Chris were with his mom. He felt bad for leaving her, but he just couldn't stand to be downstairs anymore. Everyone kept saying how sorry they were and that they knew how he felt. He could only stand to be around Alex and Jay right now because they were like brothers to him and he definitely needed them right now.

There was a soft knock at the door. "Come in uncle Nick." Jay called to the other side.

Nick opened to door and leaned in. "How did you know it was me?" He asked.

Jay shrugged. "Lucky guess."

Nick smiled slightly. "I'm going to go get all the food we ordered from the pizza place downtown, you guys wanna come with me?"

All three boys were happy to go along. They were glad to get away from the hectic house and were happy to get a distraction. They relaxed in the car as they listened to music and talked about random things, keeping a steady conversation flowing. They laughed and joked with each other, keeping their minds off of what they would eventually have to go back to before too long. But until then, they kept it out of their minds and just enjoyed being with each other out of the house.

* * *

Thanks for the reviews.

Next chapter should be up soon.


	16. Chapter 16

Alex was finding it increasingly difficult to look somewhere other than the alter, his cousin sitting next to him or his dad. He was staring down at his shoes, but out of the corner of his eye he could see Erik's tear stained face. At one point he had glanced over at Jay, who was sitting on the other side of his dad, and had seen Jay looking back over at him and Erik to see how they were holding up. Truth be told, they weren't. 

At first, everyone in the small church seemed to be more concerned about what had happened outside than the funeral service that was to take place. When they had arrived at the church, there were dozens of people outside with signs and posters yelling at everyone going inside. Alex didn't know what was going on, but everyone else seemed to. He saw Cisco grab his dad's arm as they walked by the people. Jay pulled Erik and Alex against him and kept his arms around their shoulders as they quickly went up the stairs into the church.

Once they were inside, Jay went with Erik and Alex to the back room where he shut the door and locked it. Just before the door had been closed, Alex saw his dad heading back outside with his uncle Chris. They both looked madder than Alex had ever seen them before, which told him that whatever was happening wasn't good.

"Jay, what's going on?" Alex asked.

Jay sighed. "The people out there are protesting." He said.

"Protesting what?"

"They're all mad because unlce Colin was gay. A lot of people down here in Texas don't think that being is gay is right, and they like to make a big scene out of everything. They want to get attention and cause problems because they think they're right when they're wrong." Jay explained.

"Why are we back here?" Erik asked. He sounded somewhat nervous at what the answer would be.

Jay knew it was impossible to lie to his cousins because they would easily be able to tell, so he continued to tell them the truth. "To keep you guys safe. Remember when I said don't listen to what people are going to say?"

Erik and Alex nodded slowly.

"Well, they might try to come in and yell things at us, or even hurt you because they think we're bad people for loving uncle Colin."

"But we're not." Alex said.

"I know that buddy, but they don't. That's why it's important for you guys to always remember that no matter what anyone ever says to you, don't listen. You guys didn't do anything wrong, and neither did uncle Colin."

The boys fell silent and remained that way until Chris and Nick came into the back room, their faces paler than they had been before. They lead the boys out into the church and to their seats in the pews in the front row. Chelsea was first, followed by Erik, Alex, Nick, Jay, Chris and Lauryn. In the row behind them was Mr. and Mrs. Stokes with the rest of their children sitting with them. The rest of the church quietly filled up with other relatives and friends of the family and Colin. Before too long, the service began and everyone went silent.

Which was where they were now, unable to do anything else but wallow in their grief. Alex had never seen so many people so sad before, and he had definitely not seen it from his dad, Jay and Erik, who were always so happy and upbeat all the time. Alex looked from Jay to his dad, who caught his glance and smiled down at him sadly. Nick wrapped his arm around Alex's shoulders and fought back a sigh as the service continued. All Nick really wanted for this to be over so it would stop taking its toll on his family.

Instead of going with most of the other people from the church to the cemetary, Erik and Alex went back to the house with Jay. The younger boys were silent in the car as their older cousin drove them back to the ranch. Nobody knew what to say, so no one said anything at all. They all wanted nothing more than to break the silence, but coulnd't find a way to do it. Jay turned the radio on, but no one listened to it. They were all too worried about each other to pay attention to anything else.

Fifteen minutes into the ride home, Erik finally spoke up. "Hey Jay, can we stop and get some food?"

Alex nodded in agreement. "Yeah, I'm starving."

"Me too." Jay said. "That sounds like a good idea cuz I highly doubt there's any food left back at the house."

They pulled into a Wendy's, the only fast food place they ever ate at. Jay took them inside for a better distraction from everything and they ordered their food. They sat at a booth in the back and took their time eating their food. They were able to strike up a conversation about video games and skateborading to keep themselves occupied. When they had finished eating, they sat around for a couple more minutes and continued talking before they got up and threw their trash away. They returned to the car and were still engaged in a conversation that lasted them the rest of the ride back to the ranch.

Once they were back, the boys went upstairs to the guest room and immediatly turned on the PS2 they had stashed up there. Jay put in Tony Hawks' Pro Skater 2 and they started playing right away and after some time were able to forget about everything else and have fun with each other again. They joked and laughed liked they had the night before with Nick in the car when they were going to pick up the food.

They weren't sure how long they had been home for before they heard cars pulling into the driveway followed by voices downstairs. It wasn't long after that before the door opened and Nick came in, looking less than awful. His face was as white as a ghost and his eyes were bloodshot with dark circles under them. His dark hair was a mess from running his hands through it so much and his white dress shirt was untucked with his tie loosened around his neck. Nick silently walked in to the room, closed the door and collapsed into a chair in the corner of the room.

"You looked like you could use a game." Jay said, handing his uncle the controler.

Nick smiled slightly. "I think you're right kid."

* * *

Alex was glad to be back home, but was sad at the same time because he knew he wouldn't get to see Erik or Jay again until Christmas. Even though that was only two months away, it seemed a lot longer to Alex. But he pushed that to the back of his mind and focused on listening to his dad and Mike Tenser in the other room talking about what happened with Warrick. Alex and Zach were in Alex's room, straining to hear the adults in the kitchen. 

"Can you hear anything?" Alex asked.

Zach shook his head. "No, you?"

"Nope. I bet they're doing it on pupose. They must think we're too young to know the truth."

"But we already do."

"Yeah, that's true. I just wanna know what happened when my dad went back outside with my uncle Chris after me and Erik went into the room with Jay."

Zach had met each of Alex's relatives that he had mentioned, and knew them quite well. "They probably just yelled at the people until they left. I bet that if it wasn't a funeral they would have gotten into a fight."

"Probably." Alex agreed.

"Your mom didn't show up, did she?" Zach asked.

Alex shook his head. "No, thankfully she stayed wherever she is. She probably didn't even know Colin died."

"Why aren't your parents together anymore?" Zach asked carefully. He knew that Alex's parents didn't get along, but he never knew why. He hadn't asked until now and knew his best friend would be able to tell him the truth.

Alex sighed. "They were never together to begin with. They met at Colin and Chelsea's wedding, then my dad came back here because he didn't live in Texas anymore. My mom never told him she had me until I was eight when she sent me up here. She just got rid of me because she didn't want me anymore. So I stayed here with my dad."

"They were never married?"

"Nope. My mom hates my dad more than anything else in the world, and my dad hates her because she tries to hurt me all the time. Cats and dogs get along better than they do."

"You lived with her for eight years, right?"

"Yeah, and they were all terrible. I would never ever leave here to go back there for anything. I wish I never had to live with her in the first place. She's arguably the worst human being in the world."

"It was that bad?" Zach asked.

Alex listened for approaching voices for a second before answering. "She tried to kill me a few times."

Zach gaped in surprise. "What?"

Alex nodded. "Yeah, she did. She locked me in my room once and left me there. I had to jump out the window and break in through the garage. She went somewhere for a week and was mad I was still there when she got back. Then she tried to poison me with medicine she knew I was allergic too and had her boyfriend beat me all the time."

Zach was stunned. "Did you ever tell your dad any of that?"

Alex shook his head. "No. He knows what Mark did to me and everything, but that's all I ever told him. He never mentions her, and I don't want to bring her up."

Zach, Jay and Erik were the only other people Alex had told about Mark other than his dad and the judge during the trial. He didn't plan on telling anyone else and would do almost everything to never have to remember that ever again. He remembered how mad Jay had gotten when he had found out and knew his cousin would have tracked Mark down if Nick hadn't already taken care of that.

"I'm glad I never knew my mom." Zach said softly. "If she's the kind of person who would just up and leave her kid and husband, than I don't want to know her."

Alex smiled slightly. "We don't need 'em." He said.

Zach smiled back and nodded in agreement. "Yeah. And besides, they probably wouldn't let us have the half pipe."


	17. Chapter 17

More than a year had gone by since Colin's funeral. Alex had only seen Erik at Christmas a few months after, and they had been talking less and less each month. Instead of worrying about that, Alex tried to ignore it by spending that much more time with Zach. The more time he spent with his best friend and neighbor, the less he thought about Erik, and therefor worried about him less. He knew his cousin would be okay and that he just needed some time to get over it. 

Alex hadn't spoken a word about what had happened with his dad. It had bothered him at first, but then he understood how hard it had been and thought it was best if they didn't bring it up if it didn't need to be. Slowly but surely they thought about it less and less. When Alex did talk to Erik, they didn't talk about anything other than movies, music and skateboarding. Alex never asked if Erik was okay, and Erik seemed grateful for thar fact.

Alex and Zach were shooting around in Zach's driveway after they got home from school. It was Zach's birthday, but they wouldn't be celebrating until later on because both of their dads were still at work. Zach was glad to be able to brag about being older than Alex for the next couple of months. Even though Alex had moved up a grade, Zach was only a few months older than him because when he had moved from his other school the cut-off had been different and he had a late birthday for the grade he was in now. They were two of the youngest kids in the grade, but it didn't matter. They were still the best players on their junior high soccer, basketball and baseball teams and were very popular with the other kids.

"So how does it feel to finally be a teenager?" Alex asked as he shot a jumper from the foul line.

Zach smiled. "You'll know in a couple months."

Alex laughed. "What are we doing tonight anyway?"

"I think we're getting chinese food and are just gonna hang out." Zach said with a shrug. "Do you think anyone else would want to spend a Friday night, on their birthday, hanging out with their dad?"

"And their best friend, and their best friend's dad, who's best friends with their dad." Alex added. "But no, I don't think anyone else would. Then again, no one else has dad's like we do. And I bet Warrick and Greg will end up coming over too because they never seem to have anything better to do than hangout with us."

"They won't stop until they beat us at something." Zach said with a laugh. "They haven't succeeded yet, and it's kind of embarrassing."

"They'll probably make us just watch a movie or something tonight so we can't beat them in rummy as bad as we did last time. That was pretty bad."

Zach nodded in agreement. "Warrick shouldn't have taught us how to play then."

Almost an hour later, the boys were still outside playing basketball when Nick's Denali and Mike's Jeep drove up to their respective driveways. As expected, Warrick and Greg got out of the car with Nick and the three men headed across the street to where Alex, Zach and Mike were in the driveway. Alex tossed Warrick the ball he had and the two immediatly began playing one on one while everyone else stood around and watched.

"Did you do the laundry Alex?" Nick asked after his son had stolen the ball from Warrick.

Alex shook his head. "No, I forgot my key on the table this morning so I couldn't get in." He explained as he drove by Warrick and threw up a finger roll layup that got a lucky bounce and rolled in.

"So I guess you two dilligently did all of your homework before goofing around then." Mike said with a hint of sarcasm.

"Nope." Zach answered his dad. "We did most of it at school, and it's Friday."

"So you're gonna do the rest of it tomorrow?" Greg asked.

Alex and Zach shook their heads. "Sunday night." They said in unison.

"That's a real good study plan." Warrick said as he watched Alex's game winning shot drop through the net. The pair forgot about the ball and walked over to where everyone else was standing.

"Speak of plan's, what are we doing tonight?" Zach asked.

Nick shrugged. "It remains to be seen. Catherine and Grissom are coming over after they wrap up their case, and Lindsey said she would too because she doesn't want to go to some party or whatever. What do you wanna do birthday boy?"

Zach shrugged. "I have no idea."

Mike rolled his eyes at his son jokingly. "Do you wanna go out to dinner or order something?"

Zach looked at Alex. "We went out for dinner the other night after basketball when Greg picked us up. Wanna get chinese food?" Zach suggested.

Mike nodded, as did everyone else. "Sounds good. We'll go get a movie too or something when we send you two in to get the food."

Alex's eyes lit up. "We should get all the Saws and watch them."

Mike groaned. "Why are you so addicted to scary movies?"

"A combination of my dad, Warrick, and Greg forcing me to watch them. Not to mention your son having seen every single scary movie ever made, and not being scared of any of them." Alex explained.

"Don't worry Mike." Nick said, patting his friend on the back. "You'll get used to them soon. Maybe."

* * *

Alex and Zach were paying more attention to making Lindsey watch the movie then watching it themselves. Lindsey was four years older than the boys and therefor stronger, but she was beginning to give in to their constant perserverance to make her watch Saw III. She had been forced to see the other two on past occassions and figured it was useless to fight any more.

Halfway through the third movie, the doorbell rang loudly throughout the house. Everyone jumped, and Lindsey even screamed. Their eyes all darted to the door, but no one made a move to go get it.

"It's all you Alex." Nick said after a minute.

Alex sighed. "Scardy cat."

Alex slid off the couch and crossed the living room over to the door. He opened it enough to peek through and see who was on the other side. Upon doing so, he stood completely still and didn't say anything.

"Is it Michael Myers?" Zach asked.

Alex shook his head. "Much worse." The twelve-year-old turned around and looked back into the living room, his eyes locking with his dad's. "It's mo-"

Alex didn't have time to finish his sentence. An arm snaked through the crack in the door and pulled him through to the other side, the door slamming closed. Nick and Warrick were off the couch before the door had closed and opened it a split second after it slammed. They stopped on the front porch and froze in place when they saw Stephanie with her arm around Alex's neck, and broken bottle in her other hand.

"Let him go." Nick said calmly as everyone else crowded out onto the porch behind him and Warrick.

Everyone knew who it was except for Zach and Lindsey, who exchanged frightened glances with each other. Greg gently pulled Zach and Lindey back into the house by their shoulders and made them go in Alex's room and shut the door before returning to the porch.

"Why? He's just as much my son as he is yours. I should get to see him every now and then." Stephanie said, slurring her words from the alcohol.

Nick fought back his anger. "You said you wanted nothing to do with him. You gave him up. So leave him alone and stop showing up like this. Just leave us alone."

"I can't help it that's it's all I think about. How I thought you were such a nice guy, so I let my guard down. Then you took advantage of me and this happened." She said, motioning to Alex with the broken bottle. "It wouldn't have been such a big problem if he wasn't exactly like you."

Alex opened his mouth to say something, but Nick cut him off. "Shut up Alex." Nick stepped off the porch and slowly walked across the grass to where Alex was. "Just let him go and we can talk, okay?"

Stephanie shook her head. "The only thing I hate more than him is you." She said coldly.

Stephanie pushed Alex to the ground and lunged at Nick's flailing her arms in the air. She lashed out with the bottle and cut open Nick's left arm all the way from his palm to halfway up his arm. But since she was so drunk, Nick was able to fend her off and knock the bottle to the ground. He pinned her up against Catherine's car in the driveway and didn't need to look over his shoulder to know Warrick had jumped off the porch and brought Alex into the house.

Brass' cruiser rolled up moments later, and Stephanie was taken into custody. Greg had called the police captain when he had gone inside the house with Zach and Lindsey. Now he went back inside the house and brought back out with him a wet towel that he wrapped around Nick's arm for his injured friend.

"You should go to the hospital." Catherine said worriedly.

Nick shook his head. "No, it's not that deep. I'll be fine, let's just go back inside."

They thanked Brass, who had to return to work. Once back inside, Warrick and Greg calmed the kids down while Grissom and Catherine took care of Nick's arm. Mike put the movie back to where they had left off befoe their inturruption. When everything had settled down, they all returned to the living room and sat back down around the TV.

"Sorry my psychotic mom ruined your birthday Zach." Alex said apologetically.

Zach shook his head. "She didn't. It was just a minor lapse in our fun. Nothing we can't ignore."

Everyone laughed lightly at that. "That's not even considered 'odd' to use anymore." Catherine added.

They went back to watching the movie, and when it was done they ate ice cream cake and just hung around. They quickly forgot about their little encounter with Alex's mom earlier in the evening. With that in the back of their minds, they carried on with their fun night that only managed to get better when Warrick actually challenged Zach and Alex to rummy again, even though he knew he would probably lose. Again.

* * *

Thanks for the reivews everyone )


	18. Chapter 18

* * *

If Alex hadn't already been sitting on his floor, he would have been because he was scared so bad when he heard his dad's voice in his doorway. He dropped his pen from his hand and his notebook almost fell off his lap, but instead slid to the side a little before it was caught by the blue bean bag chair Alex was sitting in. He was fourteen-years-old now, but as jumpy as a five-year-old. 

"I didn't even hear your car or you come into the house." Alex explained once his heart stopped beating in his ears.

"Maybe you would have if you turned down your music a little bit." Nick said as he walked over to Alex's stereo and turned it off. "We could get robbed and you wouldn't even know."

Alex shook his head. "No we wouldn't. Maverick would spring into action and bite whoever it was." They both looked over at the yellow lab that was curled up on Alex's bed. He wagged his tail at Nick, but made no move to get up. "Okay, maybe he's not the best guard dog."

"So how'd your game go?" Nick asked, already having gotten the details from Mike and Zach earlier.

Alex shrugged. "We won by one point. It was a good game."

"Mike told me you hit the game winning shot, which added to your 17 points and 11 assists."

Alex sighed. "Well I wasn't gonna tell you that so you wouldn't feel bad for missing it. It's not a big deal, it's just AAU."

Nick sat down on Alex's bed next to Maverick, who rolled over and rested his head on Nick's thigh. "I should have been able to go. I wasn't counting on another case, and I didn't wanna let Greg go solo until Warrick was done his case so I went with him."

"Makes sense. You guys never go solo though, how come?"

Nick sighed heavily. He knew that sooner or later he would have to tell Alex about his kidnapping, but he was hoping to put that off for as long as possible. "Something happened, and Grissom doesn't like to leave it to chance anymore." Nick explained.

That only peaked Alex's interests more. "What happened?" His dad looked down and started petting Maverick's head. "Come on dad, that's not fair. You can't say a little bit about something and assume that I'm gonna let it go. Why can't you tell me what happened?"

Nick looked up at Alex and sighed again. "You're not gonna give up on this, are you?" Alex shook his head. "Fine. A couple years ago, when you were probably only about six, I was working a crime scene by myself. There was a cop there, but he was throwing up and not paying attention to anything. I was kidnapped from the scene and buried in a glass box underground. The guy sent a tape and a USB drive so the team could watch me in the box. He wanted one million dollars in twelve hours, or he'd let me die."

Alex stared at his dad, eyes wide with shock. "Are you serious?"

Nick nodded. "They got the money, but the guy blew himself up and didn't tell them where I was. They had to find me on their own. So since then, Grissom does everything he can to avoid having anyone go solo at a scene because it's not worth taking the risk."

"Why didn't anyone tell me this before?"

"Because you were too young to know about that before. I still think you're too young, but you would have found out eventually. That's one of the only times Catherine's sworn as bad as she did."

Alex smiled slightly. "What did she say?"

Nick's own smile tugged at his lips. "Fuck."

Alex laughed. "I should get to say it now because she did. I know that'll never go over, but it's worth a shot."

"I think they say worse stuff on TV, and it's not like you haven't heard it in movies or anything." Nick said.

"Or from you."

Nick shrugged. "It's either I swear a lot or I smoke. Bad language is worse."

Alex was surprised again. "You smoke?"

"Fuck." Nick thought out loud, and Alex laughed slightly at that. "Yeah. Not a lot though, and never here. Not anymore anyway." Alex looked skeptically at his dad. "It's only like, three a month. I swear. It used to be a lot worse, trust me. Then Warrick threatened my life and I quit. Sorta."

Alex shook his head. "It's not good for you ya know. And even a worse habit to have when you have an impressionable thirteen-year-old son, who could steal some because he wants to be like his dad."

Nick rolled his eyes. "You know better than to do that because I would kick your ass if I ever caught you, which I would."

"That's true." Alex agreed as he scribbled the last answer to his history homework before closing his notebook and throwing it next to his dresser with the rest of his books.

"Wanna go see a movie?" Nick asked outta nowhere.

Alex looked at the clock next to his bed. "It's almost ten, and it's a school night."

"Yeah, but I don't have to work until tomorrow night and I wanna see 'We Own the Night.' I know you wanna see it too, but it's rated R so you can't without me." Nick said mockingly. "Do you have anything important to do in school tomorrow?"

"Nothing I couldn't learn from Zach if I missed it. No tests or anything. Friday's are easy when we don't have tests."

Nick shrugged. "Then you can skip school tomorrow. You don't have AAU practice anyway, and I really wanna see this movie. Did you finish all your homework?"

Alex stood up from his bean bag chair. "Who cares? You're letting me skip school tomorrow to go see a movie. There's something hypocritical about you asking if I did all of my homework, don't ya think?"

* * *

"That was one of the best movies I've ever seen. Mark Wahlberg is the man." Alex said happily as he and his dad walked out of the theater, back to their car. 

Nick nodded in agreement. "Did you eat dinner yet?" He asked.

Alex shook his head. "No, Zach and Mike went out after the game and I just went home instead cuz I had to finish a history paper, but now that doesn't matter."

"I haven't eaten either, let's go to Wendy's."

They climbed into the Denalie, and Alex looked at the clock displayed on the radio. "It's almost one in the morning, you want dinner now?"

"Yeah. I usually eat dinner at like six in the morning, but I'm starving right now. And the great thing about Vegas is everything is open 24-hours. Perfect for the job I work."

Alex laughed in agreement and turned the radio on. They listened to a CD Greg had given Alex all the way to Wendy's, where they were able to go in and sit down to eat. On their way out, Alex smiled when he saw the Denali parked next to the curb. It's tires were on either side of the line for the space and looked like someone had parked in a hurry.

"Great parking job dad." Alex said sarcastically.

"Think you could do better?" Nick asked.

Alex nodded. "Probably."

Nick shrugged. "Alright, let's see." He said as they got into the car.

"What do you mean?"

Nick pulled out of the parking lot of Wendy's and headed in the opposite direction of their house. "We'll go to the airport parking lot, and I'll let you drive. Trust me, no one's around there this time of night."

"Are you sure it's a good idea to let me drive for my first time at night? At one in the morning?"

"Why not? You had plenty of soda, so you're not about to fall asleep. Cars do have lights ya know."

It wasn't long before they were in McCarren airport, and Nick had been right. There were less than ten cars in the parking lot, and no one was around. Alex and Nick got out the car, walked around it, and traded seats. Once they were back inside, Alex looked at his dad somewhat nervously. When Nick didn't say anything, Alex did.

"Are you gonna tell me what to do?" He asked.

In an unsually serious tone, Nick replied, "Put your seatbelt on, and don't hit anything."

* * *

Once they were back home, Nick and Alex both sat on the couch and started flipping through the channels to find something good to watch on TV. They agreed on watching old episodes of _Seinfeld_ and were silent except for the occassional comment about Kramer or George thrown out here and there.

After the third episode, Alex decided it was finally safe to voice a question he had had for some time now. "Why didn't my mom want me anymore?" He asked during an episode they had seen at least ten times.

Nick looked at Alex, clearly trying to think of what to say. "I don't know. She's not exactly sane, and only cares about herself I guess."

"But I never did anything to her to make her want to kill me, especially when I was little." Alex said before he fully thought about what he was saying.

Nick paled. "What? She tried to kill you when you were younger too?"

Alex looked down at the floor, then back up at his dad. "She tried to like starve me a couple times, and had some of her boyfriends beat me up a little. The mean ones anyway. Some of them were okay. They weren't all like Mark." He paused for a second, then asked, "Why did you tell me to hide my clothes and wash my arms when you killed Mark?"

Nick remembered when Alex had asked him that in the hospital and had known then that he was too young to understand. Now he was a lot older, and Nick saw no harm in telling him the truth.

"Remember how you shot the gun too, but missed?"

"Yeah."

"Well, I didn't want anyone to find gun shot residue on your arms, see the angle Mark was shot from and think you did it. I shot him from my knees, which was about how tall you were. And I didn't want them to see the blood on your clothes and think you tried to kill me." Nick explained.

"I wasn't trying to, you told me to." Alex said, his voice shaking slightly.

"I know, and I'm glad you did. He would have hurt you if you hadn't. You didn't do anything wrong, and I just wanted to make sure no one would find anything to suggest otherwise. It might have looked to someone like you killed Mark and then tried to kill me."

Alex nodded slowly. "Don't be mad or anything, but after that and what happened to uncle Colin...I want nothing to do with being a CSI, or a cop, or a lawyer or anything. Too many things end up going wrong with the justice system and I don't understand how people don't try to do something about it."

"I don't blame you for that. I wish they had let me work Colin's case, we would have caught them easily."

"Why didn't they?" Alex asked.

"It was too far out of our jurisdiction, the DA didn't want to pursure anything because he's a jackass, and Brass, Warrick and Grissom were afraid I was going to kill the first suspect we found. They were probably right, too."

"They wouldn't have tried to stop you or anything."

Nick laughed slightly. "That's true too."

"Do you think the world would be too boring if nothing bad ever happened?"

Nick sighed. "Probably. But I bet it would be worth it. I'd take boring over tragic in a heartbeat."

* * *

Thanks for the reviews. Next chapter should be up soon.


	19. Chapter 19

Alex was having a very difficult time trying to process what was going on at the moment. He felt like he was having an extremely bad dream and couldn't wake himself up from it. But the shaking of his hands and dizziness in his head told him that this was real. He felt like everything was happening in slow motion and there was nothing he could do to change anything that had happened. He looked down at the jumpsuit he was now wearing, but what he really saw was the blood staining his clothes, reminding him that what happened did happen as he sat in the interrogation room in LVPD, a place he had been thousands of times, but never for the reason he was there now. 

"I'm going to ask you one more time." The police officer said, his tone rising with each word. "Why did you kill him?"

Alex shook his head slowly. "I'm gonna tell you one more time. I'm not saying anything until my dad gets here. I'm not stupid. Now go get my dad or Jim Brass"  
Officer Hyndes scoffed. "I doubt you know the captain, or that your dad is who you say he is. Just confess to it right now and it'll make this whole thing a lot easier for both of us. We found you there, covered in blood. Come on kid, give it up."

Alex didn't say anything. He felt tears stinging his eyes and all he wanted to do was get up and run, but none of his muscles were working properly. His throat was all choked up and he couldn't make sense of anything anymore. He was scared out of his mind, and he was completely alone.

He wasn't sure how long it had been since the last time officer Hyndes had spoken, but sometime later Brass stormed into the room, his face red with rage. He went straight up to Hyndes, getting in his face and showing now signs of backing down anytime soon.

"Just what the fuck do you think you're doing?" Brass yelled, making Alex jump. "Do you understand that what you did is not only stupid, but illegal? He's only fifteen-years-old. When he asks for an advocate or a parent, you give him one. You're not only fired, but I'm sure there's going to be charges pressed."

In the midst of Brass' yelling, Nick had come into the room and immediatly over to Alex, ignoring the other two men in the room. Alex looked helplessly at his dad and felt his hands start to shake even worse. Nick kneeled down in front of Alex and put his hand on his son's shoulder, trying to calm him down.

"Did you say anything?" Nick asked.

Alex shook his head slowly. "No. I didn't do anything I swear. I just went in and saw him like that and then-"

"It's okay." Nick said softly, cutting Alex off. "Don't worry, everything's gonna be okay. Just calm down."

Alex nodded slowly and watched as Hyndes exited the interrogation room as detective Vartann entered. Vartann walked around to the oposite side of the table across from Nick, Alex, and now Brass and sat down without a word.

"What are you doing here?" Brass asked, understandably coldly.

Vartann had expected it, and didn't blame Brass. "PD and the DA felt that this was a conflict of interest for you, but they wanted it to be handled by someone who knew Alex, just not as well as you. So I'm here to help."

Brass sighed. "Sorry Chris."

Vartann held up his hand. "Don't be." He looked down at the table for a moment, then up at Alex. "I just need you to tell me exactly what happened. Don't leave anything out. I know you didn't do it, I just need you to give me your side of the story because you were the only one there."

Alex looked at his dad, who nodded, then took a deep breath. "Me and Erik were playing video games when my dad left for work. We ordered a pizza and stayed up for a little while longer, then we were both tired so we went to bed. An hour or so later, I heard a car start in the driveway outside my room and drive off."

"You hadn't fallen asleep?"

Alex shook his head. "No, not yet. I got up a couple minutes later and went into the guest room where Erik was staying, but he wasn't there. I looked outside and his car was gone, so I called his cell phone but he didn't answer. I went back into his room and saw an address for a motel not far from the house, so I called Zach and he brought me there. He dropped me off and went back home because I didn't want him to get in trouble for being out with me or something that late."

"After he dropped you off, what did you do?"

"I saw Erik's car outside of a room with the light on in the window. I knocked on the door, but there was no answer. The curtains were drawn so I couldn't see inside. The door was unlocked, so I went inside and that's when I saw him. He was on the bed bleeding, so I went over to try and help him. He still had a pulse so I tried to stop his wrists from bleeding as much as they were. I didn't even notice the knife, and I know I shouldn't have touched anything but he was still alive and I was just trying to save him."

Tears silently started to fall down Alex's cheeks and he did nothing to try and stop them from falling. He looked down at his shaking hands resting in his lap and tried to stay calm, but he was slowly losing control over his emotions. He was overwhelmed and was unable to control anything anymore. Giving in was inevitable.

"How long was it before you called 911?" Vartann asked.

Alex sniffed. "I don't know, a couple minutes I guess. I tied the sheets around his arms and grabbed the phone. Then I went back over to him and kept trying to wake him up, but he never did."

Vartann glanced at Nick and Brass, who were both watching Alex closely. The detective continued. "The lab confirmed that the suicide note was written by Erik from the paper he signed when he checked into the motel."

Alex looked up. "He left a note?"

"Yeah." Vartann looked at Brass, who nodded for him to go on. "It said he was sorry for doing this to you, but he had no other choice and hoped you would understand. Do you know why he did this?"

"He was scared." Alex looked down, then back up at Vartann. "He was pretty sure that he was gay, and was scared that what happened to his dad would happen to him too. He mentioned it a couple times, but never talked about it much. He never said he would do anything like this. I would have stopped him if he had."

Vartann nodded slightly and took out his cell phone. He spoke briefly to someone the other end before hanging up and looking at Nick. "You can take him home. DA was just presented the evidence and the coroner ruled it a suicide. Alex is all set, it's not going to be on his record or anything."

Alex shook his head slowly. "That doesn't matter. It wouldn't have mattered anyway. Either way, Erik's gone and I couldn't save him."

* * *

Alex heard his dad click the phone off and put it back on the charger. He heard him sigh heavily and slowly walked from the kitchen into the living room where Alex had been sitting on the couch for hours on end. The fifteen-year-old's eyes were bloodshot from crying and had dark circles underneath them from him being so tired. Despite his exhaustion, Alex pulled himself off the couch and over to his dad. Alex pulled himself against his father, who wrapped his arms around him tightly as sobs took over Alex's body.

"I'm sorry dad." Alex choked out. "I didn't know he was going to do that. I should have been able to stop him."

"I know." Nick said, his own tears building up in his eyes. "It wasn't your fault."

"Why do bad things keep happening to me? Why did this happen?"

Nick shook his head slowly. "I don't know buddy." Was all he could say. He wish he knew himself, but truth was he just didn't.

* * *

Three hours later, Alex had finally fallen asleep. Nick had brought him over to Zach's house, were Mike and his son were waiting to help in any way they could. Zach and Alex had gone into Zach's room after two hours of being out in the kitchen with their dads. They both climbed into Zach's king sized bed and talked with each other until they both fell asleep around four in the morning.

Nick was relieved to hear silence coming from Zach's bedroom down the hall. He stared down into his empty cofee mug and slowly rubbed the back of his neck. He felt Mike's eyes on him and wished he knew what to say. He had run out of things to say after having talked to Chelsea, Catherine, Warrick, Grissom, and Brass several times each. He was exhausted, but knew there was no way he would be getting any sleep anytime soon.

He looked up at Mike. "Sorry I'm keeping you up."

"Don't be, tomorrow's Sunday anyway. I'm here to help you right now, nothing else."

Nick nodded slowly. "Thanks man." They were quiet for a few moments before Nick spoke again. "I can't believe this happened. It feels so all of a sudden. Bad things just keep happening to Alex, and he thinks they're all his fault."

"Things like this...they're hard to grasp. They're a part of life, and Alex is the kind of kid who would do anything to protect the people he loves."

"It's not fair that this many awful things has happened to a kid who's life isn't even close to half over. I'm scared that he's going to think this is how everything works out and that bad things are just always going to happen. I don't know what to do. I can't stop them from happening."

Mike sighed. "No, unfortunately you can't. But what you can do is keep being a great dad to Alex. You're the best thing in that kid's life, and he knows that. He'll always have that. He'll always have you."

* * *

I'm sorry for it taking me so long to update. I'm also sorry for another sad chapter, but it's to build the relationship between father and son stronger through tragedy, as depressing as it is. Thanks for the reviews, and the next chapter should be up soon. Hope you're all enjoying it and will stick with me through this story. 


	20. Chapter 20

Nick groaned when he heard his cell phone ringing. He had fallen asleep not even two hours ago, and Grissom was already calling him back in. Nick was contemplating not answering the phone when he figured he should in case it was important. When the caller ID displayed a number he didn't know instead of Grissom's, he frowned slightly and answered it. 

"Hello?" He said, his voice laced with sleep.

"Mr. Stokes?" The voice on the other line asked.

Nick sat up in his bed, the tone of the other voice making him immediatle alert and nervous. "Yeah?"

"This is Mr. Perkins, the principal at Valley High School. I'm calling about your son, Alex."

"Is he okay?"

"He's fine. There was an incident at school, however. Would you mind coming in to pick him up and so I can explain it to you?"

"Yeah," Nick answered. "I'll be right there."

Like he had much of a choice.

* * *

Nick was glad the ten minute drive over to Alex's high school woke him up, because he definitely needed to be wide awake for this. He walked into the school and right into the front office, where they directed him to the back of the large room where a big oak door stood. Nick went through it and into the principal's office, where Alex was sitting in front of the desk Mr. Perkins was behind. The principal was an older man, nearing sixty, with kind blue eyes that matched his suit. He stood and shook hands with Nick, afterwards motioning for Nick to sit down next to hit son in the other chair.

Nick glanced at Alex, who was staring down at the floor. His right hand was slightly bruised and he looked very pale. Nick stopped analyzing his son and turned to Mr. Perkins, who had returned to his large leather chair behind his desk.

"Mr. Stokes, Alex here got into a fight with another student in the hallway after lunch."

Nick looked back over at Alex, who didn't move at all. "He did?"

Perkins nodded. "I'm afraid so. It's school policy that anyone fighting is to be suspended for a minimum of three days, which is the case for both students now. However, the teacher that broke up the fight and myself know that Alex is a good kid, so he'll only be suspended for one day and will have to help out here at the school for the rest of the month. Does that sound fair to you?"

Nick nodded. "Yeah, thanks for going easy on him."

"My pleasure." Perkins said with a small smile. "Alex, Mrs. Lagiere would like to see you in her office. I need to speak further with your father, then you can go home."

Alex merely nodded and got up from his seat, leaving without a word. He didn't even so much as glance over at his dad or even acknowledge that he was in the same room with him. When the door closed behind Alex, Nick sighed heavily and turned back to Perkins.

"I'm very sorry for this sir." Nick said. "He's had a rough month. That whole thing with his cousin, plus he hasn't been feeling well physically."

"I understand. But unfortunately, other don't see it the way I do."

On perfect cue, a middle-aged woman burst into the office, shutting the door anything buy quietly behind her. She stood firmly near the door and crossed her arms in front of her chest. Nick frowned slightly as he stood and extended his hand to shake hers, but she didn't take it. Perkins rose as well, sensing the upcoming need for him to mediate a dispute.

"You're Alex's father?" The woman spat.

Nick nodded. "Yes, I am. And you are..."

"Mrs. Adams, Alex's english teacher."

"The same english teacher that never calls on him in class and criticizes every little thing he does on his essays?"

Mrs. Adams scoffed. "He's a stubborn student, and I bet he gets it from you. I'm concerned about him. He's been being short with me in class, and his grades have been slipping."

"I understand that." Nick said. "He's had a rough couple of weeks, he'll be fine."

"I don't think that's the problem."

"Mrs. Adams-" Perkins interjected, but the teacher ignored him.

"I think it's your fault." She said, pointing her finger at Nick.

"Me?"

Mrs. Adams nodded. "Yeah, you. I never see you at any of the school basketball games, or on parent's night."

"I work nights. I make what games I can and haven't been able to go to parent's night. I don't neglect by kid, but I appreciate your concern." Nick said sarcastically.

"Someone has to be concerned because you obviously aren't."

"That's enough Mrs. Adams." Mr. Perkins said firmly. "Mr. Stokes is a single father, and in my opinion he's been doing an extraordinary job with his son. Alex has had trouble recently because of family problems. It happens to everyone."

"Alex doesn't have a stable parent at home." Mrs. Adams said. "He needs to be somewhere where he has that. He has anger issues as well, it's apparent to everyone. This is a cry for attention that he's not getting."

Nick shook his head. "You just want him out of your class because he's smarter than you."

"He definitely gets it from you." Mrs. Adams said, rolling her eyes. "He needs to be sent to a boarding or reform school."

"No, he doesn't. He's my son, you can't decide where to send him."

"He needs more than what you're giving him."

"Enough!" Mr. Perkins shouted, causing Mrs. Adams to jump. "You are way out of line Leslie. Please, return to your class. This isn't your concern. Mr. Stokes and I will discuss the best course of action."

When Mrs. Adams tried to protest, Perkins dismissed her with a stern, "Thank you."

Mrs. Adams left the same we she came in. After the door was slammed shut, Nick sank back into his chair as Mr. Perkins did the same thing.

"I apologize on Mrs. Adams' behalf. She's always very outspoken and opinionated."

Nick sighed. "It's okay. She has a valid point, but took it a little too far. Do you think it's worse than I think it is?"

Perkins shook his head. "No. I think Alex is experiencing a lot of difficulty in his life right now and needs a father there for him. No one here thinks he's being neglected, other than her. I understand your situation. It's something only you and Alex can work out."

"What did he get into a fight about anyway?"

Perkins shrugged. "I don't know. Neither boy said. Other students who saw it said that the other boy, Max, started it verbally and Alex was trying to walk away. Regardless, rules are rules."

Nick nodded. "I understand. I'll talk to him."

* * *

The car ride home felt like it took an eternity because of the heavy silence between the two Stokes' boys riding in the black Denli. Alex stared out the window, ignoring the occasional glance his father threw at him to see if he was okay. No one reached to turn the radio on, and no one tried to strike up a conversation of any kind. They both knew there would be a conversation once they got home, so they were trying to think of what they were going to say.

Alex was out of the car and in the house before Nick even took the key out of the ingnition. He got out and followed his son in, sighing when Alex went right to his room, shutting the door.

"Alex." Nick called, just loud enough for him to hear.

Alex slowly opened the door and returned to the living room. He sat on the couch in front of his father, excepting his fate. He kept his eyes down at the floor and his hands buried in his jeans pocket.

"Now would be a good time to tell me when you got into a fight at school." Nick said.

Alex shook his head slowly. "It's not a big deal. It doesn't matter, forget about it."

"I can't forget about it." Nick replied. "I was just bitched out by your english teacher for not being a good parent. If something's wrong, I wanna know what it is. I wanna help you Alex, but I can't if you won't tell me what happened."

Alex looked up at his dad. "I just...Max was just being a jerk and wouldn't shut up. I know I shouldn't have punched him...multiple times...but I couldn't help it. I'm sorry."

"What did he say?" Nick asked.

Alex looked back down at the floor and figured he wouldn't get away with not answering, so he gave in. "Everyone heard about what happened to Colin and Erik. No one really said much about it except that they were sorry and it sucked and all that. But Max has always been a jackass. He went out of his way to make fun of me for it."

"What did he say?" Nick repeated when Alex didn't exactly answer the question.

Alex sighed. "That they deserved to die because they were gay. I ignored that, I just kept walking. Then he said something along the lines of me being gay too cuz I never hook up with any of the girls that like me. Again, I kept walking."

"So what did he say to make you stop and got back to punch him?"

Alex looked up for a second, then back down at the floor. "He said that I must have gotten it from you because you're clearly gay because you don't have a girlfriend and my mom's not around. He said you deserved to be killed for it too. He said that Colin, Erik, and you all deserved to be dead. I don't care if he said that about me. But fuck him if he's gonna say that about you guys."

Nick was awestruck. He didn't know what to say or do, so he just stood there, staring down at his son. He didn't know how he was supposed to yell at Alex for getting in a fight when he would have done the same thing if someone had said that about his brother, nephew, and especially about his son.

Nick took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "I...you can't hit people when they...don't do..." He stutterted, none of what he was going to say making any sense to him. "I don't know what to say to you. I don't think what you did was wrong, seeing as how I'd probably do the same thing. But is that the only thing that's been bothering you?"

Alex frowned. "What do you mean?"

"I know you haven't been feeling well and your grades have slipped a little, which I understand. After what happened with Erik, I don't blame that on you. But your english teacher might have had a point."

"Mrs. Adams is crazy, don't listen to her." Alex said.

"She was right though. I never get to go to your basketball games and you are on your own more often than I'd like."

"Dad, I don't need more attention. That's not why I got into a fight. I'm fine, seriously. It's not your fault. Don't worry, I'd tell you if it was."

Nick smiled slightly. "Good point." He sighed and ran his hand through his hair. "Okay...go to your room. Or something. I don't know. Go read a book."

Alex laughed slightly and stood from the couch. He went into his room, leaving the door open. Once he was out of earshot, Nick took out his cell phone and dialed one of the few numbers he knew by heart.

"Hello?"

"Hey Cath, it's me."

"Oh hey Nicky, what's up?" Catherine said.

Nick sighed, again. "I need your advice. I don't know what to do. Alex got suspended from school for fighting. But he was only fighting because some kid said that Colin, Erik and me deserved to be dead because we're gay."

Nick realized that sounded weird after he said it, but Catherine got what he meant.

"Well it's not like he just went after a kid. What do you think you should do?"

"Tell him not to fight people just cuz they're idiots I guess. But I would have done the same thing." Nick shook his head. "Maybe I made a mistake. He would have been better off with someone else, who knows what they're doing."

"That's not true and you know it." Catherine objected. "The one thing Alex has going for him right now is the fact that he's a great kid with a great father. He's with his own dad, not some stranger. You're doing a fine job Nick. Just keep doing what you're doing, and both of you will be fine."


	21. Chapter 21

"Don't worry so much." Alex said, trying to reassure his guest that everything was going to be okay, despite what they were currently thinking. Nick suddenly walked into the living room where Alex was, unaware of the kids' presence. 

"Well I fucking hate you too." He said harshly before snapping his phone shut and somehow refraining from throwing it at the wall.

"Dad?" Alex said, getting Nick's attention.

Nick looked over at Alex and smiled slightly. "Sorry, I didn't hear you guys come in. I was talking to..."

"My mom." Alex finished.

Nick nodded. "Unfortunately."

"Why did you answer the phone in the first place?" Alex asked.

"I actually called her...it's not important. We won't be talking anytime soon. Or ever at all most likely."

Alex shook his head slightly before changing the subject. "Dad, this is Sydney. Syd, this is my dad."

Syd smiled shyly and extended her hand, which Nick shook. "Nice to meet you Mr. Stokes."

"Please, call me Nick. It's nice to meet you as well. Sorry I swore."

"He does that a lot, especially when he talks to my mom." Alex said.

Nick sighed. "Yeah, that has a little bit to do with it." His phone suddenly rang loudly. Nick looked at the caller ID and sighed again. "Alex, pretend to be me."

"Why? Who is it?"

"Ecklie."

Alex shook his head. "No. Be a big boy and take care of that yourself. You wouldn't let me go to the Red Sox parade, so I'm not doing this for you. Fair's fair."

Nick rolled his eyes. "You're so mature." He opened his phone and reluctantly held it to his ear. "How can I help you?" He listened for a couple seconds before rolling his eyes again and responding. "Fine, I'll do it. It wasn't my fault, or even my case, but I'll fix it. For you Ecklie."

"Greg mess up a case file again?" Alex asked when his dad closed his phone and slid it into his pocket.

Nick shook his head. "No, Ecklie did but it trying to make it look like Greg and Warrick messed up. So I get to go fix it." Nick went into his bedroom and returned with a jacket that he pulled over his shoulders. "Did you miss any work at school when I took you to get your license?"

"Nope. It's Friday, teacher's don't give out homework on Friday's."

"You lucked out there. Alright, I gotta go to the lab for a little while. I'll be back for dinner with everyone else later. Don't let Maverick in my room, he keeps trying to eat my pillows." Nick smiled at Syd on his way out. "See you guys later."

Alex led Syd over to the couch and then went into the kitchen, returning moments later with two water bottles for the two of them. He handed one to Syd and immediatly took a long sip of his. Syd fiddled with her cap, still somewhat nervous.

"I knew kids said you and your dad looked a lot alike...but that's uncanny." Syd commented.

"I know. It's kinda weird. Thank God I'm more like him instead of my mom though."

Syd nodded slowly as she took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "I don't wanna pry, and I know it's none of my business, and if you don't wanna answer it you don't have to. I don't want you to get mad or anything-"

Alex cut her off. "Syd, you can ask me anything. I'm your boyfriend. That's what I'm here for." He said with a smile.

Syd sighed. "Okay. I just heard stuff at school about your family and never really knew the truth. What's the deal with it all, like with your mom and dad?"

Alex had been expecting that question. "My mom and dad met at my dad's brother's wedding in Texas. They hooked up, and it was a one night stand kinda deal so he came back here after. My mom obviously got pregnant, but she didn't tell my dad about it. When I was eight, she sent me up here to live with him cuz she was sick of me. Then she came back up here with her stupid boyfriend and tried to take me back for whatever reason. There was a whole trial about custody and everything, and my dad won. My mom forever hates me dad, and he hates her because she's tried to kill both of us on numerous occassions. It's pretty much what you've heard in school."

"I'm sorry." Syd said. "That's terrible. You and your dad get along though, right?"

"Oh yeah, I love living here. It's a lot better. My dad's a really good guy. Just when he talks to my mom, he understandably gets a little mad kinda easily."

Syd smiled slightly. "Yeah, I don't blame him there. Zach told me all about how great your dad and all your dad's friends are."

"See? You have nothing to be nervous about." Alex reassured her.

"Yes I do." Syd argued. "I'm meeting all the people you always talk about. And I don't even fully understand why this whole big party thing is going on in the first place."

During their conversation, Alex and Syd had left the living room, then the house altogether. They had made their way out into the backyard, into the fresh air of the cool late October afternoon. The air was colder than it usually was, but only cold enough that a light sweatshirt was required for comfort. They took seats on the back deck facing the yard where the sun was slowly starting to go down behind the trees on the outskirts of the yard.

"It's my dad's best friend's birthday. Warrick's. Ironically, it's my half-birthday, which is why I got my license today. So it's a join celebration I guess. I don't know really, just go along with it. Everyone wants to meet you anyway." Alex explained.

Syd looked at him wide-eyed. "How many is everyone?"

"Warrick, Greg, Catherine, Grissom, and Brass. Then Zach and his dad are coming too, but you already know them. It's not that many. They're all really nice, don't worry."

"I hope they like me."

"They will, I'm sure of it." Alex said. "They're my family. Grissom's like my grandfather because he's the oldest and smartest out of everyone. He's my dad's boss. Brass is like the over protectice but cool uncle. He's the police captain of LVPD. Then Greg's like my brother. He acts like he's seventeen but is an absolute genius. I might as well call Catherine 'mom' because she's the most maternal person ever. And Warrick's like an extension of my dad. It's one big crime-fighting family."

Syd laughed lightly. "I'm excited and nervous at the same time I guess. I know there's nothing to worry about, but that never stops me from worrying. Ever." She looked out over Alex's for the first time since they got out there. "You have a halfpipe in your backyard?"

"Yeah." Alex responded, as if everyone had halfpipes in their backyard. "I haven't used it much recently though. My uncle got it built for me when I was younger. My uncle Colin, the one that was killed. Erik's dad."

"Oh." Syd said softly. "I'm really sorry about all that, it must have been tough."

Alex nodded. "Yeah. It still doesn't feel real. I keep thinking Erik's gonna call me sometimes or something or that I'm gonna see both of them when I go back to Texas for Christmas. It sucks cuz I know I never actually will ever again."

Syd put her hand on Alex's arm and rubbed it gently. "Luckily you have such a great family to help you get through all that, huh?"

Alex smiled. "Yeah, and a great girlfriend. I'm a pretty lucky kid when it comes down to it."

* * *

"So tell me again why you felt it was necessary to repeatedly swear at Ecklie under your breath. Did you honestly think Nick wouldn't hear you and start cracking up?"

Warrick's voice was audible before him and Greg were visible. Moments later, both men came through the front door, closing it behind them. They stood in entrance way to the house and continued their conversation.

"I don't know." Greg replied. "I guess I thought he had more self control or something. It wasn't that big of a deal. Grissom giggled once or twice too. It's fine."

Warrick rolled his eyes. "Whatever man."

The two CSIs the noticed Alex and Syd, who were sitting on the couch watching TV. They walked over into the living room and sat down on the loveseat next to the couch, both smiling at the two kids on the leather couch opposite them.

"Syd, this is Greg and Warrick. Guys, this is Syd." Alex said, introducing them.

"Nice to finally meet you both." Syd said.

"You too." Warrick and Greg said in unison.

"So where's my dad?" Alex asked.

Warrick sighed. "I don't know. Probably still yelling at Ecklie. Who knows. Last time I saw him, I told him I'd come here and hold down the fort. I had to take Greg with me before he got him and Nick both fired for being smartasses."

Alex laughed. "Why am I not surprised?"

"Cuz they're both idiots." Warrick answered. "He'll be back in a little bit with Cath, Grissom and Brass."

A little bit ended up being only twenty minutes. Alex, Syd, Warrick and Greg were watching Mythbusters when Catherine entered the house, carrying three large grocery bags. Zach and his dad followed, with Brass and Grissom close behind. They each had armfulls of bags packed with food and other necessities. Alex, Syd, Warrick and Greg all stood and went to help everyone else, which led to other introductions. Once all that was done, all the bags were set on the kitchen table and counter.

"Why is there so much food?" Greg asked.

"It's a special occassion." Catherine said. "Warrick's birthday, and Alex's half-birthday. Fifteen and a half is a big deal. He has his license. That's a big deal. So we need to celebrate with lots of good food."

Greg shrugged. "Good enough for me."

"Is my dad still at the lab?" Alex asked.

"No, I'm right here." Nick said as he joined everyone else in the kitchen. "I just had to do something quick."

Maverick was bounding around the kitchen, enjoying all the people in the house. Catherine and Grissom started cooking dinner, with the help of Syd and Alex. Nick and Greg started playing video games and Warrick was arguing with Brass over something that happened years ago and didn't matter anymore. Zach joined in helping with dinner, and Mike went into the living room to watch Nick beat Greg in Madden for what had to be the hundredth time that month.

When dinner was ready, they all crammed in to the kitchen and sat at the table that was slightly too small for all of them. They ignored it and just enjoyed all of the excellent food and each others company. Not too long after dinner started, Syd started to feel more comfortable and talking to everyone willingly. They all laughed and joked throughout dinner and stayed at the table for another hour after they had finished.

Alex and Greg had just finished clearing the table when Nick called his son into the living room where everyone else had gone to. Greg followed Alex in, a grin on his face as well as everyone else's. All except for Syd, who knew as much as Alex did. Nothing.

"What's going on?" Alex asked.

"I got you a little half-birthday present." Nick said. He tossed something shiny and silver across the room to Alex, who caught it. "There ya go."

Alex caught the cool metal object and opened his hand to reveal it. It was a Boston Red Sox World Series Champions key chain. The Red Sox logo was in a field of blue and bordered with a silver circle. The center was smaller than the outer part, allowing the emblem to spin if one were so inclined.

Alex smiled. "Thanks. This is awesome."

"Yeah, but you need something to put on it." Nick said as he tossed another gleaming object to his son.

As soon as Alex caught it, he knew what it was. He didn't have to open his hand, but that didn't stop him. He flexed is fingers and looked down at the car key sitting in his palm. He stared down at it for a second before looking back up at his dad, his smile wider than before.

"You got me an Audi?"

Before Nick could respond, Alex was out the front door and standing on the front porch, looking at the navy blue Audi in the middle of the driveway. He was shaking his head slowly as everyone else joined him outside.

"You got me an Audi."

"I kinda had to. I knew a guy, and he gave me a wicked good deal on it. It was too good to pass up. You like it?"

Alex laughed slightly. "Are you serious? It's an Audi. What's not to like?"

* * *

Sorry this took so long to get up. The next chapter is almost finished and will be up soon. Thanks for the reviews, they mean a lot. 


	22. Chapter 22

Alex would have to admit that although he had had more eventful birthdays, he wasn't bored with the one he was having right now. It was his "sweet sixteen", but it didn't really feel like it. It was school vacation, as it usually was for his birthday. Zach and his dad had gone to Florida to visit his grandparents, so they were unable to be around for it. Syd was also on a family vacation out East. Nick was pulling a triple on a high profile case, and Alex hadn't seen him in a day or so because of all the work he had to do.

But Alex was having fun on his own. He had went to the movie store and rented a couple movies and had been watching them since last night. Since he was sixteen now, he had a full license and could drive until two in the morning. His dad had told him numerous times not to for various reasons, so Alex hadn't gotten to do that yet, but he was still able to. But now he could drive his friends if he wanted to and stay out later. Other than that, he didn't feel that much different.

Alex had finished watching 'Shooter' and was getting pretty hungry, so he ordered a pizza. He didn't feel like driving all the way out to the place to pick it up and would have rathered to just stay in the house and relax like he'd been doing for the last three days. A long basketball season had ended a couple weeks ago, and he had defintiely needed this rest and was taking full advantage of it.

Alex was playing tug of war with Maverick on the kitchen floor when there was a knock at the door. Presuming it was the pizza, Alex grabbed the money from the counter and went to answer the door. He was confused when he opened the door and saw a kid who could have been a pizza delivery boy, except for the fact that he didn't have a pizza. The kid had sun bleached brown hair that was almost blonde. He was taller and at least two years older than Alex. He was dressed in faded jeans and a red polo. He shifted nervously and tried not to avoid Alex's eyes.

"Can I help you?" Alex asked politely.

"Are you Alex Stokes?" The kid asked.

Alex nodded. "Yeah." He felt a knot form in his stomach. "Are you here about my dad? Is he okay? Did something happen to him?"

"Oh, no no no." The kid answered quickly. "I'm sorry if I scared you or anything."

Alex sighed. "It's okay. He's a CSI and I haven't talked to him in a couple days and his job's pretty dangerous. It's easy to get worried." The other kid nodded slightly. "So what can I do for you?"

"I guess I should introduce myself first. I'm Ryan Jacobs."

Alex frowned slightly. "Jacobs?"

Ryan nodded. "Yeah. I'm your brother."

Alex stared at him for a moment and could easily see the resemblance. Ryan was older, taller, and tanner, but looked like Alex. They had the same body type and facial features. Alex's hair was darker, but they both had dark brown eyes and spoke with a Texan accent.

"I...you're my brother?"

"Yeah. Stephanie Jacobs is your mom, right?"

Alex nodded. "Yeah. It's just she told me she didn't have any kids other than me. I never heard about you or anything. I'm sorry I'm being rude, I'm just surprised."

Ryan shook his head. "No, I understand."

"Oh, come in. Sorry." Alex said, unable to stop apologizing.

Alex led Ryan over to the couch, where Maverick met them and immediatly started licking Ryan's hand. Ryan smiled and pat the golden retriever's head softly. Alex forgot all about the pizza and the money in his hand and couldn't help but stare at Ryan, realizing how easily they could be considered brothers by their looks.

"I guess I should probably explain this to you, huh?" Ryan said, and Alex nodded with a small smile. "I'm nineteen, so when Steph had you, I was three. When I was four, I was taken away from her and Mark and sent to live with my uncle in Dallas. She called and whatever every once in a while, but I never saw her. She never told my uncle or me that she had had you. I moved to California when I was fourteen to live with my other uncle when the one I was living with before got died. The one I live with now told me about you and your dad and how you lived in Vegas. I'm on spring break and figured I'd come meet you."

"She never told me about you either. No one did. When I was eight, she sent me up here to live with my dad. This whole big thing happened because her and Mark tried to get me back because they said my dad wasn't a good guy or something. My mom and dad were never married, they met at my dad's brother's wedding and it was a one night stand kinda deal." Alex said, explaining his own story.

"Yeah. We're technically only half brothers, but you're the only one I've got so I don't care how much it is." Ryan said.

Alex smiled. "Same here." His smile faded little by little. "Is Mark your dad?"

Ryan shrugged. "I don't know. I don't think so. He was just with my mom when I was there I guess. I don't remember him much. He might be I guess."

"Oh...well, Mark's dead." Alex said, and Ryan didn't seem affected at all. "My dad killed him, in self-defense. Mark was trying to kill me."

Ryan nodded slowly. "Yeah, from what I remember, he wasn't exactly a great guy."

Alex froze as he put the pieces together in his head. He hoped it wasn't true, but before he put any more thought into it, he spoke. "That's why you went to live with your uncle when you were three. You told."

Ryan's eyes gave him away, but he tried to hide it at first. "Told what?"

"He did it to you too."

"Wait...he did it to you? Mark did?"

Alex nodded. "Yeah. I didn't tell anyone though. Not till later when I came up here. I told my dad and the judge at the hearing. I've never told anyone else."

"Me either. Just my friend's mom when I was little on accident. That's why I moved to Dallas." Ryan shook his head slowly. "I can't believe he did it to you too. That son of a bitch." He sighed. "Well, there's another thing we have in common."

Alex laughed lightly. "Yeah, unfortunately. So where do you go to college?" He asked, changing the subject quickly.

"UCLA." Ryan answered. "I'm majoring in political science."

"That's cool. Do you like it there?"

Ryan nodded. "Yeah, it's awesome. I almost went to UNLV. I probably would have come to see you sooner if I had. I gotta tell you, I was so nervous. I don't know why."

Alex laughed. "It's not everyday you have to go find some kid and tell him you're his brother."

Ryan nodded. "Yeah, that's a good point. So where do you go to high school? I thought you were the Alex Stokes I was reading about from Valley High school, but they said you're already a sophomore even though you just turned sixteen later in the school year."

Alex nodded. "I moved up a grade when I was younger. That's me, I got to Valley High."

"That's awesome. Your basketball team just went to the state finals, right?"

"Yeah, and we won by three against the team that beat us there last year."

Ryan nodded. "Yeah. My uncle sends me all the stuff about you all the time. You and that Zach Tenser kid are like the best players on the team and you're the youngest."

"Yeah, he's my best friend. He actually lives across the street."

Ryan laughed slightly. "That's so cool. They should put that in the paper. Do you play any other sports?" Ryan asked.

"Soccer and baseball." Alex said. "Basketball's my favorite though."

"I played those too, but baseball's mine. I love it."

"There's a few more things we have in common."

The doorbell rang, and Alex excused himself to go get the pizza. He came back in and offered some to Ryan, who readily took it. They were both starving and ate the entire pizza themselves in only about twenty minutes. Almost as soon as they were done eating, the door opened and Nick walked in, tossing his keys on the floor and leaning up against the door behind him.

"Hey dad." Alex said. "Rough case?"

Nick nodded. "Ecklie doesn't understand the term 'conflict of interest' at all. I had to break up a fight between Warrick and a suspect. Then, when I try to explain how stupid he is, Ecklie gets all mad and says I'm being disrepectful when in reality, the jackass almost got our suspect killed. But somehow that was my fault."

Nick saw Ryan sitting next to Alex, and once he did he straightened up, frowning slightly. Ryan stood from the couch and went over to Nick, nervousness in his eyes again. He extended his hand and Nick shook it, confusion spreading across his own face.

"I'm Ryan, Alex's brother." Ryan said. Seeing the look on Nick's face made him add, "Half brother. Same mom. Different dads. I don't even know who my dad is."

"Not Mark, right?"

Ryan shrugged. "I'm not sure. Either way, I'm not here to get money or anything. I just wanted to meet Alex and my uncle told me you guys lived here so I figured-"

Nick cut him off. "Woah woah woah. Calm down Ryan. You're more than welcome here. Relax kid."

Ryan smiled. "Sorry. I was just worried I'd be disturbing you guys or something. I probably should have called first."

Nick shook his head. "Nah. I don't think we even have a house phone anymore, and they don't put cell phones in the yellow pages. Besides, we're used to people just coming over." As if on cue, Greg and Warrick came through the front door. "See? Happens all the time."

"What did you tell Ecklie?" Warrick asked as soon as Nick turned around to face him.

"That he's a jackass and almost blew our entire case cuz he wouldn't switch you and Greg."

"Well what did Ecklie say?" Greg asked.

"That you weren't experience enough to handle that case, and that he doesn't trust me to make sure you knew what you were doing. At that point, I yelled at him some more, swore a little bit, then left. I may or may not be suspended."

Warrick sighed. "Ecklie should be fired. He has no reason not to trust you."

"Well, I did sleep with a hooker than ended up being killed a few hours later. That didn't help too much. Then I almost got killed, on the job, three times. I can see why Ecklie hates me." Nick heard Alex laugh and sigh behind him, which called everyone's attention to the other boy who looked like a California version of Alex. "Oh, guys, this is Alex's brother, Ryan."

Warrick looked from Ryan, to Alex, back to Nick. "Are you kidding me? You did it twice?"

Nick shook his head. "What? Oh, no. He's not my kid too. Steph's their mom. Different dads. Smartass."

Warrick held his hands up in self defense. "You can't blame me for thinking it man."

"That's true. Anyway, screw Ecklie. He'll be gone in another year if we have any luck at all."

"Which you never do." Greg pointed out as he sat down in the leather recliner. "Is that 'The Shawshank Redemption' I see over there?" He asked, motioning with a nod to the DVD on the coffee table.

"Yeah." Alex replied. "I rented like four movies yesterday. Wanna watch it?"

Everyone agreed and settled onto the couch around the TV as Alex put it in the DVD player and started the movie. They watched it with limited inturruption, the only time being when Ecklie called Nick, who threw his phone down the hallway.


	23. Chapter 23

The entire team had been in the break room for the last two hours watching Nick, Warrick and Greg play video games. It was a really slow afternoon, and they had been wondering why Ecklie had asked Grissom to keep them all here to fill in some of day shift's missing people. There had only been one case, a smash and grab at a pawn shop off strip that Greg and Catherine had solved within the hour. Everyone on day shift was either on vacation, sick, or in court, so the graveyard shift got to pull a double. Having nothing else to do, they all wound up in the break room to just relax and hangout, like they had been doing for the last two hours. That was how Brass knew exactly where to find Nick. 

The police captain walked into the room, coming to an abrupt halt like he had just been sprinting down the halls. This caught the attention of everyone, even the three guys playing video game football. The look on Brass' face told all of them something serious was going on, so they all sat completely still and silent, waiting for Brass to catch his breath and tell them what was going on.

"What the hell is it Brass?" Grissom said, getting too anxious for his liking, as was everyone else.

"Alex." Brass managed to say.

Nick immediatly stood up. "What happened? Is he okay?"

"We don't know. Alex and Syd were in a car accident, and now Alex is missing. Syd's in the interrogation room with Detective Vartann waiting for us."

He didn't have to say another word. Everyone got up and quickly followed Brass back down the hall he had come down to where Syd and Vartann were waiting. Nick and Brass went through the first door to the main room, and everyone else went into the door next to it to watch from the observation room. Their heads were spinning from the brief description from Brass of what had happened and no one could stop themselves from picturing the worst case scenario.

Syd's head snapped up when Nick walked in, revealing her tear stained, terrified face. "Nick I'm sorry I don't know what happened I didn't think that was going to happen I didn't even see it coming I-"

Nick cut her off. "Calm down Syd, it's okay. I know it's not your fault, just relax. Are you okay?"

She nodded weakly. "Yeah, I'm fine."

"Can you tell us what happened?" Brass asked.

Syd sighed. "What I remember. I twisted my ankle at soccer practice, and I knew the boys didn't have practice so I called Alex and asked him if he could drive me home because my parents are away this week. Zach brought him up to the school and was gonna follow us to my house. I guess he got stuck at a red light, but he knows where I live so Alex just kept going. Then out of now where we got slammed into by some big truck I think."

"What side did they hit you on?" Brass asked.

"The drivers. Glass went everywhere and the air bags went off. I think I might have gotten knocked out for a little while or something. The next thing I remember is some woman asking me if I was okay. Alex was gone, and the door wasn't even open."

"He wasn't anwhere at the scene, he didn't go anywhere to get help." Vartann said.

Brass shook his head. "I don't think he would have been able to move much if they had hit his side that hard. So where the hell is he?"

"Did you recognize the truck or anything?" Nick asked.

Syd shook her head. "No. I'm not even sure if it was a truck. It was a big car though, and I'm pretty sure it was red. That's the last thing I remember seeing out of the corner of my eye before the crash."

Nick nodded slightly. "Are you sure you're okay?"

"Yeah. I wish I could help more but I just didn't see."

"I know, it's okay. We'll find out where he went, don't worry." Nick said to reassure everyone listening, including himself. But before he had time to speak again, Ecklie came into the room with a solemn look on his face.

"Nick, there's a package for you." He said quietly.

Everyone watching froze. They remembered when their friend had been abducted and a package had been sent to them from Nick's kidnapper. This was already seeming way too familiar, and it didn't help that now it involved their friend's son, who they were all close to.

The team, Brass included, followed Nick and Ecklie to the layout room where a package was waiting for them. They all spread out around the table and looked down at the small brown box in the middle of them. Nick looked warily at Ecklie, who merely nodded before looking away from Nick's frightened eyes. Nick took a deep breath as he reached out and grabbed the package, openly it slowly due to his unsteady hands and racing heart.

Nick pulled from the package a small USB drive and an envellope with his name written on it in a neat scrawl. Everyone was gaping at the USB drive as Nick read the folded piece of paper in the envellope. Warrick was feeling uneasy about the similarities this had with Nick's kidnapping, and he could see that it was spreading rapidly throughout the rest of the team, even through Ecklie.

Nick handed the letter and envellope to Grissom, who checked it for prints even though he knew there wouldn't be any. Grissom looked down at the letter than back up at Nick, who nodded slightly. Grissom licked his lips quickly before he began.

"Dear Nick," Grissom read. "I regret to inform you that we have your son, and that you will not be getting him back alive. If you recall, three months ago, you took my son away from me. You sent an innocent kid to jail. My son never did anything wrong. You and I both know that. So now I'm going to make you lose the only thing you have to lose. You even get to watch your son die right in front of your eyes, just like I'm doing through plate glass windows at the jail my son is going to be in until the day he dies. Unfortunately for you, it's going to be as slow and painful as I can manage. Maybe then you'll understand what you did."

"It's from that Reskin guy. The one who's son was a drug dealer and killed two college kids over a bag of cocaine. We got an easy conviction and the guy freaked. He blamed the whole thing on us." Nick said after Grissom had finished reading.

"I remember that case." Warrick said. "The guy thought you framed his kid. He threatened you a couple times. How come nothing was done about that?"

Brass sighed. "He never acted on them, until now. There wasn't much we could do."

Grissom silently took the USB drive and plugged it into the nearby computer, bringing up the image on the large pull down screen in the middle of the back wall. Everyone just stared as the image folded out in front of them, only adding to their anxiety and making their nerves that much worse.

Alex was sitting on a metal chair in the middle of a small, empty room. His hands were sitting on his laps, neither them nor his feet bound. But they didn't need to be. Glass protruded from most of the left side of his body where the window had shattered, sending shards of glass to slice through his skin. Blood was slowly trickling down from a deep cut above his right eye and there were numerous other cuts and bruises scattered about his body. Nick was glad he couldn't see any more bruises on his son that he knew were under Alex's clothes, hidden from view.

Catherine put her hand over her mouth as tears spilt from her eyes at the sight before them. Nick and Warrick stared blankly at the screen, helpless. Brass and Grissom were getting people together to try and find this guy, as well as getting Archie to start putting a trace together to find the location of the server.

In the midst of everything, Nick's cell phone rang.

"It's a blocked call." Nick said as he read the caller ID display.

"Answer it." Brass instructed.

Nick flipped the phone open and held it to his ear. "Hello?"

"Hi Nick." Reskin's familiar voice said from the other line. Nick immediatly knew he was on some kind of speaker phone because he could hear Reskin's and his own voice echoing off the walls of where ever Reskin and Alex were.

Nick saw Alex look over at something off screen to the right. That must have been where the phone was placed. Nick put his own phone on speaker and put it down on the table. He tried to stay calm, but knew that was going to be extremely difficult given the current situation.

"I swear to God, if you touch him, I'll kill you." Nick said, keeping his voice level.

"Not touching him would defeat my whole purpose of killing him." Reskin said with a sinister laugh.

Reskin stepped in front of the camera, coming from the right of Alex. He had a rope in his hand, which he tied one end around Alex's left wrist and held the other end of the short rope in both of his hands. Alex kept his eyes locked with the phone, eagerly waiting for his dad to say something else.

"As I'm sure you're aware, Alex here was in a very bad car accident." Reskin said. "I'm fairly positive that he broke his left collar bone upon impact, as well as a couple ribs I'd imagine."

Before Nick had time to say anything, Reskin pulled on the rope, jerking Alex's arm suddenly. Alex yelled out in pain as he felt the broken bones grinding against each other. He tried to pull his arm back, but it was too weak to move it on its own. Reskin dropped the rope and moved to the other side of Alex, putting his hand on his left shoulder and leaning down on it casually. Alex clenched his jaw against the pain, but that did nothing to subdue it.

"You took my son away from me." Reskin said angrily.

"That wasn't my fault." Nick almost yelled. "He was dealing drugs and killed two college kids. He wasn't the perfect person you thought he was. It wasn't my fault."

In response, Reskin pushed off of Alex's shoulder and picked the rope back up, pulling on it as hard as he could. Alex nearly fell out of the chair, unable to do anything against the pulling on his arm. He tried to slip his wrist through the knot, but it was tied so tight that it was cutting off his circulation. His fingers were going numb and the room was slowly starting to spin around him.

"It is your fault." Reskin said.

"How is it his fault if you were a terrible father?" Alex said hostily.

Reskin pulled a gun from the back of his pants and thrust it against the back of Alex's neck. Everyone in the room held their breath, except Nick, who immediatly spoke as soon as he saw Reskin move for the gun he knew the other man had.

"Shut up Alex." Nick said

Reskin laughed lightly. "You should listen to him."

"Yeah, cuz he's actually a good father."

Reskin pressed the gun harder against Alex's neck, causing him even more pain. "Alex, please just shut the fuck up." Nick said. "Stay still and don't say anything."

Reskin scoffed. "Real nice, swearing at your son. You're such a jackass, I bet your a terrible father."

Just as Alex opened his mouth, Nick cut him off. "Alex, don't. Look Reskin, I'm sorry your son is in jail. But this isn't Alex's fault. You don't want to hurt him."

"Yes, I really do."

Nick was glad Reskin couldn't see how frustrated and scared he was. "Just leave him alone. Let him go. I'll do whatever you want, just let him go."

Reskin shook his head slowly. "No. This is exactly what I want. I want you to just stand there and watch me torture and kill your son, just like you're doing to mine."

Reskin hit Alex in the back os his neck and head a few times, ignoring the protests from Nick and Warrick, who were the only ones who could formulate sentences at the moment.

"Stop fucking hitting him!" Nick yelled loud enough to egt Reskin's attention.

Reskin lowered the gun and picked up the rope again with his free hand. "Why should I listen to you? You can't do anything to me. I'm the one with your son. I'm the one with the gun."

Nick didn't know what else to do. He had no reason to give Reskin to leave Alex alone. He knew the other man wanted nothing more than to carry out his plan. Nick couldn't let that happen, but he was running out of time and had no ideas or anything helping him make this any easier. All he wanted to do was beat the hell out of Reskin until he couldn't move, but that wasn't an option right now. Getting Alex out of there was his only option.

And he finally saw how he was going to do that.

* * *

Sorry it took so long to update, only for a cliffhanger. Next chapter will be up soon. Thanks for the reviews. 


	24. Chapter 24

"Okay Reskin, you win." Nick said in mock-defeat. "There's nothing I can do but watch. If you don't mind, I'm gonna hang up the phone though. Watching is bad enough without having to hear my son die." 

Reskin laughed. "Go right ahead. Enjoy the show."

Nick quickly hung up the phone before he could hear whatever Alex had opened his mouth to say. He tore his eyes away from the screen and looked at Brass, forcing himself not to look back at Alex and Reskin.

"I know where they are." Nick said. "He's got Alex in the storage facility that we had that case on last week. I recognized the boxes in the background. It had the name of the place on it, U-Stor or something. That's where he is."

Brass took out his cell phone and started dialing as he said, "Alright, then lets go."

Nick was glad that Brass was driving because his hands were shaking so bad that if he had been, they would have surely been in an accident by now. Warrick was sitting with him in the backseat while Detective Vartann rode in the front next to Brass. Syd had been left in the break room with Zach who had shown up earlier. The two kids were accompanied by Greg, who was doing his best to distract them from the current situation. Grissom and Catherine were keeping an eye on the monitor with Archie, making sure nothing happened before Brass showed up at the storage compound.

The police captain had called the manager and supinaed Reskin's information that he had left when he registered for the storage space. He had block K1180, in the back of the compound. The manager had confirmed that Reskin's car was parked outside his block and the door was closed, so he was standing by with the key ready for when Brass showed up.

The closer they got, the longer it seemed to take to Nick. All he could see in his head was Reskin pulling the trigger and killing his son. He forgot about how much he had wanted to hurt Reskin as he thought about the pain Alex must be in. Nick knew what it was like to be scared and alone on the verge of death. He wished he could have told Alex everything was going to be okay and that they were on their way, but he was forced to with hold that information so that Reskin wouldn't be any the wiser and would carry on care-free, without suspicion.

As they turned into the storage grounds, Warrick reached across the back seat and unclipped Nick's gun from its holster before removing it altogether. He handed it to Vartann in the front seat, who put it on the ground as he was removing his own weapon.

"What'd you do that for?" Nick asked.

Warrick did the same with his gun, again handing it to Vartann. "So that you don't kill Reskin. Once you get in there, there's no way you'd be able to stop yourself. Same with me, but Brass and Vartann are trained professionals. They have a better chance of not killing this guy right away than we do."

Brass pulled the car to a stop twenty feet away from where the manager was standing outside of Reskin's block ."Not much of a chance. I'll do my best though." Brass said before they go out of the car, leaving the doors open so Reskin wouldn't hear them close.

Brass and Vartann had their guns out and ready as they approached the garage style door. Brass nodded to the manager, who quickly and silently did the combinationt to the lock before carefully taking it off and disappearing around the corner to avoid any of the conflict that was clearly on its way. Brass went to the left side as Vartann stood on the right, his arm outstretched and ready to throw the door open. Nick and Warrick stood behind Brass, out of the way, waiting.

They could hear Reskin repeatedly hitting Alex inside, and that was the only sound coming from the other side of the door other than an occassional yell of pain from Alex. Nick gritted his teeth and tried to keep himself calm, but that became more and more difficult as the seconds passed. Brass and Vartann were waiting a few more moments for their backup to get a little closer, along with the ambulance. They were counting down in their heads, trying to keep themselves calm as well. Mere seconds before Vartann threw the door open, Warrick grabbed the sleeve of Nick's shirt, getting the other man's attention.

"We get in, and we get Alex. Forget about Reskin. Brass and Vartann will get him, okay?"

Nick nodded. "Okay."

"Don't even look at the guy. He's not your problem right now. Help Alex, right?"

"Okay." Nick repeated, glad that one of them was able to think rationally.

Vartann glanced at his watch, then looked at Brass. The police captain nodded quickly, and then all hell broke loose. Vartann hoisted the door up, and Brass sprang forward. Both cops trained their guns on Reskin, who was so shocked at the sudden intrusion that he froze in place. He had been walking over to the phone to apparently call Nick again, but was stopped mid-stride. He was about five feet away from Alex, who was hunched over in his chair, clutching his injured left shoulder. Nick and Warrick were almost instantly at his side, with Warrick kneeling next to Nick in between him and Reskin, just in case.

Alex didn't even what had happened until he opened his eyes and saw his dad and Warrick kneeling in front of him. He was still clutching his arm and shaking slightly as he looked down at the two CSIs.

"I thought you guys were giving up." Alex said, his voice showing all the pain he was in.

"I'd hit you for thinking that if you weren't already in enough pain as it is. Do you think anything else is broken?" Nick asked as Brass and Vartann successfully disarmed and handcuffed Reskin as he was being pinned on the ground.

Alex shook his head. "No, I don't think so. Are Syd and Zach okay?"

Nick nodded. "Yeah, they're fine. Just relax, alright? We're gonna get you outta here."

The ambulance arrived seconds later, on perfect cue. Alex was loaded onto the stretcher and then onto the ambulance, Nick and Warrick close behind. They sat on either side of him, looking down at the mangled boy lying in front of them. They kept telling themselves he was going to be just fine, but somehow that wasn't quite enough comfort. The sixteen-year-old lying in front of them was usually so full of life and energetic, and now he was in so much pain that he couldn't even speak.

"We'll meet you guys there." Brass said before the doors closed, and Nick and Warrick both knew he meant more than just him and Vartann.

Nick now knew he was wrong when he had thought that the ambulance ride after he was rescued from the plexiglass coffin was the longest one ever. It seemed to him like they weren't even moving at all, when in reality they were going as fast as possible. Everything around him seemed to stop moving. All he could do was sit there and stare down at his son, who was in more pain than Nick had ever seen anyone before. He had no idea what to do, and it made him feel even worse that he was just sitting there. But his head hurt too much to think and he didn't have enough air in his lungs to speak.

The paramedics were buzzing around them, stabalizing Alex and checking his vitals. Nick felt tears stinging his eyes, and had no choice but to look away from his son. He couldn't take it anymore. He looked up at Warrick, who was having almost the same reaction as he was. Warrick locked eyes with his best friend and silently told Nick everything was going to be okay. Nick nodded ever so slightly and knew Warrick was right. He just wished everything would be okay faster.

* * *

Nick had come to realize that things happened in odd ways. He hadn't been able to think of anything but his son dying on the way to the hospital, even though he had been assured numerous times by the paramedics that Alex was going to be fine. He couldn't help it. Once Alex was wheeled away to the emergency room, Nick felt the overwhelming feeling of helplessness consume his body. He immediately felt exhausted, but had no desire for sleep.

Brass and Vartann arrived right behind them, and Grissom and Catherine followed closely after that. Nick and Warrick had aleady sunk into chairs in the waiting room to begin the grueling waiting for any news what so ever. Catherine took the seat next to Nick and rubbed his arm soothingly to keep him calm. Grissom sat with Vartann and Brass across from his CSIs, who were joined shortly after by Greg who had come straight from a scene.

So they waited, silently, together. Nick sat there and looked around at his team, his friends, who were looking at anything but him. That's when he again realized that good things can come from bad things. His son was battered and in pain in surgery at the moment, but he had seven people anxiously waiting for him to come out just so they can see him. Nick knew that was more than Alex ever had, and it was more than he would have ever asked for.

Sitting there, it hit him. Nick finally understood everything. All the bad stuff that had happened to him in his life was only to try and prepare him for dealing with what could happen to the people he loved. Greg's lab explosion and beating had started it off, followed by his son's traumas as a kid and now this. Nick didn't care what had happened to himself before, he was actually glad for it now. Because it would help him help the people he loved. And that was the only thing that truly mattered.


	25. Chapter 25

Nick was able to somehow relax a little over the time they waited in the waiting room for the doctor to come back out and tell them how Alex was. The adults in the waiting room had been joined by Zach and Sydney, who were brought over by Mike not too long ago. Nick had reassured them as soon as they had walked into the waiting room that Alex was okay and everything was going to be fine. They all sighed in relief and took the remaining seats in the waiting room, which was now occupied by ten people, all there for the same reason. 

Nick's cell phone rang suddenly, slicing through the silence in the room. He took it out of his pocket and read the display before tossing it across to Grissom, who caught it with a frown of confusion on his face.

"It's Ecklie," Nick said as Grissom read the caller ID. "I'll end up getting fired if I have to talk to him right now."

Brass sighed. "I can't see him being too happy with the way we didn't inform him on what was happening, but there was no real reason to other than departmental policy."

"Fuck departmental policy." Nick said. "What good would that have done? Ecklie would have made us fill out all the paperwork and get permission for overtime from the sheriff to go and save Alex. Ecklie's a jackass."

Brass tried, but failed to stifle a laugh. "That's true. Just try to hold back from telling him that to his face. I think I speak for everyone when I say that we want you to stick around for a little while. You need to have a job anyway, you have a kid."

On cue, the Dr. Jaskin returned to the waiting room, looking down at the clipboard in his hands. Everyone immediatly stood, looking at Jaskin expectantly.

Jaskin looked up and smiled softly. "Don't worry, everything's fine. Alex is awake and given his condition, is very fidgety and wants to go home. We're going to keep him overnight just to be safe, but he should be able to go home tomorrow morning. You can go in and see him if you'd like."

Jaskin quickly shook hands with Nick before turning and going back down the hall to his office. Nick turned around to face everyone in the waiting room, all with relieved expressions on their faces. They looked at Nick, waiting for him to speak and tell them what to do. He didn't know what to do, so he looked at Warrick.

"Let's go see him," Warrick with a small smile that spread throughout the room.

Nick nodded somewhat weakly. "Yeah," he said.

Everyone in the waiting room quietly filed out and down the hall into Alex's room, where they spread out around his bed. When they entered, Alex had been staring up at the ceiling in obvious boredom. When he heard the door open, he looked over and smiled when he saw everyone coming in. At first he was surprised that there were so many people, but then he wasn't because he had known all along that they'd all be worried about him and would come to see him.

"Hey guys," Alex said, rather cheerfully for someone in the hospital after what he had just been through. "Are you okay?" he asked, looking at Syd and Zach.

They both nodded. "Yeah, we're fine," Zach answered. "I didn't even know anything had happened until I got home."

"How are you feeling?" Nick asked, feeling the sense of unease he had had before starting to return.

Alex shrugged as much as his broken collarbone would allow. "Fine. My arm hurts and my ribs kinda do too, but other than that I feel normal. When can I go home?"

"Tomorrow. They wanna keep you here overnight just to make sure you're okay," Nick said.

Alex sighed. "How long do I have to keep my arm in a sling for?"

"I don't know. Just relax, would ya?" Nick said, shaking his head at his son.

"I can't. I'm bored," Alex complained. "Hospitals aren't entertaining."

Warrick looked over at Nick. "He gets that part from you."

Nick smiled slightly. "Yeah, I don't blame him there." He looked at the wall for a few moments before he spoke again. "I'm gonna go try and find the doctor and some food or something. I'll be right back."

Nick left quickly, but no one other than Warrick had noticed that his hands had started shaking when he was leaving. Warrick followed Nick out a few seconds later and found him at the end of the hall, sitting on the floor with his back pressed up against the wall and his head in his hands.

Warrick knelt down in front of his best friend and pulled his hands away from his face to reveal the tears falling from Nick's dark eyes. His face was pale and his hands were still shaking.

"What's wrong man?" Warrick asked softly.

"He almost died. Reskin almost killed him, because of me. Alex almost died."

"But he didn't."

Nick rested his head against the wall behind him. "But he almost did. Because of me. I should have never taken him. He would have been much better off without me. What if he gets killed because of me?"

Warrick put his hands on Nick's shoulders and squeezed them firmly. "He's not gonna because he has you to protect him. You're the only one that ever gave a damn about that kid. No one cared about him before you. He needs you. Who knows what would have happened to him if he had stayed living with Steph and Mark or been sent with someone else. This wasn't your fault."

"Yes it was," Nick said.

Warrick shook his head. "No it wasn't. You did your job, and Reskin wanted to punish you for it. You couldn't control that Nicky and you know that. Alex needs you as much as you need him."

Nick closed his tired eyes. "I was so scared Reskin was going to kill him."

"I know," Warrick said. "We all were. But you saved him. He's gonna be okay."

Nick opened his eyes and looked at Warrick as he nodded slowly. "Reskin's lucky you thought to take my gun away. I would have killed him without even having to think about it."

Warrick smiled. "I know, that's why I took it away so now the son of a bitch has to rot in jail. And everyone else is going to be okay, right?"

Nick smiled as well and nodded slightly. "Right."


	26. Chapter 26

Alex had known that something was bothering his dad ever since he had first seen him at the hospital. He had only been in Alex's room for a grand total of about an hour, and when he was around he never said anything. The car ride home was silent, and Alex couldn't help but think he did something wrong. As soon as they got home, Alex had went into his room to change into more comfortable clothes, but lingered in there longer than he would have because he knew that his dad had went into the kitchen and straight to the fridge and guzzled down a few beers as quickly as he could before Alex came back. Alex finally took a deep breath and left his room for the living room where Nick was sitting on the couch, his head in his hands. 

Alex slowly sat down on the chair and before a silence could settle in, he spoke. "I'm sorry."

Nick quickly looked up at his son. "It wasn't your fault," he said, shaking his head.

"Then why are you mad at me?"

"I'm not," Nick replied quickly. "I don't know what I am, but I'm not mad at you. It was my fault, not yours."

"It wasn't your fault either," Alex said.

Nick shook his head again. "No, it was. I pissed that guy off, and he took it out on you. He almost killed you, because of me. If he had...I don't know what I would have done. he's lucky Warrick took my gun away before we went in because I would have shot him in the head. I wouldn't have been able to handle it if he had killed you."

"But he didn't," Alex said.

"But he came pretty fucking close," Nick almost yelled. He sighed heavily. "I'm sorry, this isn't your fault. The whole thing, it just scared the hell out of me."

Alex shrugged as much as his hurt him in his sling would allow him to. "That's kind of a good thing though," he said. Nick just looked at him silently. "Being so scared means you actually care. Until I came here, no one cared what happened to me at all. I know it sucked, believe me, I was scared too. But at least I know someone cares whether I'm still here tomorrow or not."

Nick smiled slightly. "As much as I wish you could be somewhere better than here, I'm glad you're not."

Alex nodded enthusiastically. "I am too."

* * *

Alex and Ryan were sitting next to each other on the couch, listening intently to Nick's side of the conversation between himself and Stephanie Jacobs. Nick was understandably pissed off, especially from what the two boys on the couch could hear.

"We already went though this, and you lost then. Why the hell would you think you'd win now?" Nick was silent for a few seconds before he said, "That doesn't matter. You're out of your damn mind, do you know that?"

Alex and Ryan laughed slightly and looked at each other in minor amusement.

Nick came into the living room from the kitchen. "That makes absolutely no sense. He's not even my kid, I don't even have custody of him. It's not my fault he likes me better than you. Have you ever thought that this is all your fault to begin with?"

Nick tired very hard not to throw his phone at the wall as he listened before replying, "Yeah, okay, blame it on me. I don't fucking care because you're insane. I should be able to sue _you_ for wasting my time."

Nick slammed his phone shut before dropping it on the floor and sinking into the chair across from the boys. He sighed and ran his hands through his hair several times before looking at the two boys on the couch, who were looking at him, waiting for some sort of an explanation.

"Your mom is deciding to sue me for custody, again. She says that now that you're sixteen, you can make the choice yourself, which you can. But it won't matter because she already lost before and there's a restraining order on her forbidding her to be in the same friggen state as you, so it's really pointless to even try."

Ryan nodded slightly. "But then why was she talking about me?"

"I have no idea. She thinks that I have custody of you, which I don't because you're not my kid. She's just pissed off because you hate her too and won't talk to her. She is out of her God damn mind. I swear she wasn't this crazy when I met her."

"Maybe it was the alcohol that made her seem less crazy," Alex said with a smile.

Nick rolled his eyes, but smiled nonetheless. "I wasn't that drunk. I've been a lot drunker and done a lot stupider things that if either one of you ever do, I'll kick your ass."

Ryan smirked widely. "Ya know what they say Nick, your kids do what you do, act the same way and do the same things. It's a genetics things."

Nick groaned. "Don't tell me that."

Alex laughed. "Why? What could you have possible done that was so bad?"

"I'm not gonna say so you won't get any ideas. Just promise me you'll never do anything I did."

"How can we do that when we don't even know what you did?"

Nick shook his head. "Just promise me."

Alex and Ryan both rolled their eyes sarcastically. "We promise," they said in unison.

Nick sat back with a satisfied look in his eyes. "Glad we have an understanding boys."


	27. Chapter 27

Ryan left the house soon after wards, leaving Alex and Nick alone. Nick remained in the arm chair across from Alex, who was still sitting on the couch where he had been next to Ryan. He watched as his dad repeatedly ran his hands back and forth through his short, dark hair; a habit that Alex himself had quickly developed from living with his father. He knew his dad well enough now to tell that something other than his mother's psychotic phone call was bothering him, and Alex just isn't the type of kid to not let curiosity get the best of him.

"Do you regret what happened?" he asked suddenly, getting his dad's attention.

Nick frowned in confusion. "What are you talking about?"

"Me," Alex replied. "Well, I mean how I came to be. What happened with my mom, the whole mistake thing that caused all this."

"It wasn't a mistake," Nick said, shaking his head. "A mistake is something you regret or want to change. This didn't work out exactly the way I would have wanted it to, but that doesn't mean I regret it. I don't want to change the fact that you're my son. I messed up, but it wasn't a mistake."

Alex shook his head. "That makes no sense."

"Yes it does," Nick said. "I messed up in that I got drunk and slept with someone I barely knew, and there's countless things I could have done differently. But if I could go back, I wouldn't change it because I love you. Because of it, you're my son, and the only thing I would change if I could would be for you to have a normal life with a normal mom and get rid of all the bad things that have ever happened to you. Those are mistakes. You're not a mistake."

Alex couldn't offer a response, so he just dropped his eyes to the floor. For the first half of his life, he had always felt like he didn't belong, like he didn't mean anything to anyone. And now, he had something he had never had before. He had a dad, who loved him and cared about what happened to him. He had a girlfriend, a best friend, and adults who were constantly looking out for him. He even had a brother who would do as much for Alex as Alex would for him.

He had a family.

"Trust me kid," Nick added, bringing Alex out of his thoughts and his eyes off of the floor. "I've made a lot of mistakes in my life. I know the difference."

This elicited a small smile from Alex. "Mistakes I'm not allowed to make?" he asked.

Nick nodded. "You got it. Never, ever be like me, okay?"

"You're not that bad," Alex said. "You smoke, that's about it. And it's not even that much."

"I'm talking about stuff I've done before," Nick replied. "Stuff you will never do, right?"

"What stuff?" Alex asked.

"Right?" Nick repeated, ignoring Alex's question.

Alex rolled his eyes. "Tell me what it is and I'll promise I won't do it." When his dad just scoffed at him, Alex switched around his statement. "If I promise, tell me what I'm not supposed to do. Deal?"

"This isn't a negotiation," Nick said with a laugh.

"It is now," Alex shot back.

Nick sighed heavily as he ran his hand through his hair again. "Fine," he said in defeat. "You're old enough now to know I guess."

"It can't be that bad," Alex said. "I'm not gonna hate you for anything either. I'll probably think you'll cooler."

Nick laughed slightly. "I hope not."

"There's only one way to find out," Alex said with a smile.

Nick nodded in agreement. "Well first of all, when I was your age, I drank all the time. There really wasn't much to do where I grew up, so we would just get drunk."

"Almost every kid does that."

"My friends and I were a little different," Nick said.

"For example..." Alex prodded.

"For example, I've stolen a couple cars. We returned them, it was just for fun, but I still did it. I did drugs a lot too."

"No way," Alex said in disbelief.

Nick nodded. "Yeah, I did. I started off just smoking weed, then I hated it so I switched to cigarettes for some idiotic reason. Then someone decided cocaine was a good idea, and I thought it was too. It was fun for a while, the partying and having sex with random girls. I got in countless fights with guys for no reason and did stupid things like jump off bridges into rivers and drank till I passed out. Then I thankfully grew out of it."

Alex shook his head slightly. "You turned out fine," he said jokingly.

Nick laughed again. "Yeah, thank God. But I still did a lot of things I wish I never did."

Alex nodded slowly. "I guess that makes sense because you're not a douchebag." Alex had to elaborate when all he got in response from his dad was a crooked smile. "Regretting it means you care and realize it was stupid. Douchebags would blame it on other people or just keep doing it. So you're not a douchebag."

"Thanks," Nick said with a laugh.

"No problem," Alex replied, then fell silent as he lost himself in his own thoughts. His eyes dropped to the floor once more. His sudden silence and change in demeanor was very noticeable, and Nick quickly picked up on it.

"What's wrong?" he asked his son.

Alex shook his head. "Nothing."

"You're lying," Nick stated plainly. "What's wrong?"

"I was just thinking...ya know how..." Alex tripped over his words like he had never spoken before. "I love Syd. You know that, I told you that, I told her that too all the time so it's not like it's breaking news or anything."

"Right..."

Alex took a deep breath. "I know I'm young and everything but I'm not that young. I'm almost seventeen, that's pretty old. I know I don't know anything, but I'm not an idiot and I can make decisions for myself."

Nick shook his head. "No one's saying you can't man. Calm down Alex, you're rambling like a lunatic."

"I know, sorry. But anyway, we were talking and so were me and my friends and stuff because we're not little kids anymore and me and Syd have been dating for like two years so we were just talking about..." Alex trailed off as his heart raced against his chest.

"Sex," Nick finished for his obviously nervous son. Alex nodded weakly. "But that's not why you're having a mini heart attack. What's wrong Alex?" Nick asked. He was starting to become nervous that something was seriously wrong because Alex wouldn't just come right out and say it like he always does.

"I...I don't know. I mean, I know, I just...I shouldn't be but..."

"You're scared," Nick said. Alex didn't respond, but he didn't need to. Nick already knew what was wrong. "You're scared because of what happened, when you were little. What Mark did."

"Weren't you? I thought it was just me because you said how you slept with all these other girls all the time so I thought something was wrong with me-"

"There's nothing wrong with you," Nick said, cutting Alex off. "What happened wasn't your fault, you did nothing wrong. Nothing's wrong with you."

Alex dropped his eyes to the floor yet again. "I'm just scared it's gonna hurt. I trust Syd and everything...I just keep thinking it's gonna feel the same. I don't want it to because it hurt so much before and I just thought that since the same thing happened to you...I don't even know really. I had stopped thinking about it for a while then it came up again and it's bugging the shit out of me because it's scaring me so bad."

Nick wasn't sure of what to say next, so he thought about it carefully. Finally, he came up with, "Have you told Syd what happened to you?"

Alex shook his head. "No, only Zach. I can't tell Syd, it'll freak her out."

"No it won't," Nick said. "She loves you Alex, she won't freak out. You should tell her so that she'll understand."

"Understand what?"

"You," Nick replied. "You know you can trust her, and if you tell her, she'll know to be careful so that she won't accidentally...hurt you."

Alex swallowed the lump that had been forming in his throat. "Did you ever tell anyone?"

"No," Nick responded. "The only people I ever told were Catherine and Warrick. The only serious girlfriend I ever had, I didn't tell, and I should have. I was usually drunk when I had sex so I didn't think much and didn't remember it, but not when I was dating her. I didn't tell her, and I should have."

"Did she hurt you?" Alex asked.

Nick nodded. "Not on purpose, but she didn't know. It's not like it's a generic thing."

"So it does hurt anyway," Alex said.

"It doesn't have to. If she knows what not to do, she'll be careful. It's understandable that you're scared Alex, that doesn't mean there's something with you. It actually means you're normal. I was scared too, that's why I drank all the time. I never told anyone or ever talked about it, so that's why I was kind of fucked up for a little while. I don't want that to happen to you too. It doesn't have to suck if you don't let it."

"How am I supposed to tell her something like this?" Alex asked.

"Believe me, you'll find a way," Nick said. "It's not gonna be easy, but you'll be glad you did it, and she will too."

Alex nodded slowly and was quiet for a moment before he spoke again. "When I told Zach, he literally got sick. He said he was just so shocked and mad that it overwhelmed him. I thought he would be mad at me."

"Why would he be mad at you?"

Alex shrugged. "I don't know."

"I know it's hard to understand how people can be okay with it because it's not your fault. I used to think just like you, but now that I see it looking at you, it's easier to understand. Imagine me blaming myself for what happened to me."

"It wasn't your fault," Alex said, then smiled slightly. "Yeah, I get what you mean now."

"But I'd trade in a second understanding that it wasn't my fault, because I only do because it happened to you. I'll take blaming myself instead of it having happened to you any day," Nick said.

Alex shook his head. "It wasn't your fault it happened to me either."

"Yes it is," Nick replied. "I should have been there, to protect you. I would have never let it happen to you."

"You weren't there, and that wasn't your fault. My mom should have protected me, she's the one that let it happen. There was nothing you could do because she didn't tell you. I know you would have stopped him, but it wasn't your fault. You've done so much more for me than that, so it cancels out. If I can't blame myself, you can't blame yourself," Alex said.

Nick allowed his smile to return. "I can live with that."

"Good, because you're gonna."

"And you're gonna tell Syd," Nick added. "Trust me, you don't want to not tell her. If something accidentally goes wrong, you don't want her to find out after. I know it's going to be hard to do, but you'll feel better after you do it."

Alex nodded in agreement. "Yeah, I know. I just went so long without thinking about it that when it came up again it scared me. I didn't expect to ever have to think about it again."

"I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but it doesn't just go away," Nick said sadly. "It'll keep coming up over and over again, and there's not really much you can do about it."

"I just have to learn to live with it?" Alex asked.

Nick shook his head. "Not exactly. Yeah, it sucks, but if you have someone you can talk about it with, it actually helps. You have to learn to talk about it, then it makes living with it a lot easier. Take it from me, learning that it's okay not to be okay will help you a lot."

Alex nodded slowly. "Are you someone?" he asked hesitantly.

Nick smiled. "I'm anyone you need me to be kid."

* * *

**A/N: Wow. So it took me a year to update, and I'm terribly sorry for that. So much has gone on, I just lost track of this story. I want to pick it up again, and wanted to thank those of you who are still reading this.**


	28. Chapter 28

First of all, I sincerely apologize for neglecting this story for as long as I have. I have no good excuse, it just kind of got away from me with everything else that I was working on. Thank you to anyone still reading.

The time line for this chapter and hopefully and few more is going to be off because of how I want to do this. This chapter is going to deal with Alex finding out that Nick has killed three people in the line of duty. For argument's sake, I'm going to adjust the time line of the show for creative purposes so that the events at the end of season ten and season eleven happened in what on CSI is season six, so Alex had not been living with Nick yet. Alex is 18 now and all of the events that have happened in the show have happened in this story, including Warrick's death which I have no written about but will address, which will have occurred when Alex was 16, in season 9 as it did on the show.

Hope this isn't too confusing and hope you enjoy!

* * *

"You're a murderer."

Alex's accusation was completely sudden, yet absolute certainty weighted his words in a way that made them physically affect Nick immediately. He looked up from the paperwork that was on his desk to look at his son, who had magically appeared before him in his office. He stopped tapping his pen on his desk and froze, hoping that Alex didn't know what he seemingly had somehow found out. Out of the corner of his eye, Nick saw Hodges and Greg in the hallway, distracted from whatever they had been talking about upon hearing Alex's outburst.

"Why aren't you in school?" Nick asked.

Alex shook his head. "Because it's Saturday," he replied.

Nick sighed heavily. He had once again been so absorbed in work that he didn't even know what day it was, never mind where his son was. Now that Alex was older he didn't have to worry about him as much, but he was seriously starting to reconsider that fact in light of the current situation that was unfolding.

"Fair enough," Nick mumbled in response.

"You're a murderer," Alex repeated.

Nick shook his head as he stood up and closed the door, much to Hodges' dismay. "What are you talking about?" he asked, trying to play this off as best as he could.

"The people that you've killed," Alex responded, clearly very upset and agitated. "Three of them apparently. And you know how I had to find out about this? My fucking douchebag of an English teacher. I pissed him off yesterday, again, and he threw all of this bullshit at me about how corrupt this lab is, especially you. I had no idea what he was talking about, I couldn't even defend you. Then I went online and found all of it. How could you have done that?"

"Stop swearing so much," Nick demanded. "And done what?" he asked, standing behind his desk defensively.

"You killed three people," Alex said. "Are you really going to try and tell me that you didn't?"

Nick sighed heavily and ran a hand through his hair. "You didn't need to know," he stated simply.

"Why not?" Alex asked. "Why shouldn't I know that? I'm eighteen years old dad. This time next year I'm gonna be in college, you're going to trust me to go to college but you can't trust me with the fact that you've killed people?"

"It's not about trust, that has nothing to do with it. It's all very complicated and I didn't know how to explain it to you in a way that you could understand what happened."

"I'm not an idiot. I understand these things, as much as I don't want to I do because it's your job. It's who you are and because of that I understand all of it no matter how much I hate it. But you can't even tell me yourself because you know what you did was wrong."

"You don't know what you're talking about," Nick said, trying to stay calm.

"You're right," Alex agreed. "I don't. So why don't you fill me in," he said, sitting down in the chair across from his dad's desk. "Enlighten me."

Nick rolled his eyes at his son's persistent sarcasm; another thing that was apparently inherited. Alex was so much like Nick in a lot of ways, but at the same time they were very different. The case of Nick's occupation was at the forefront of that. After what had happened to his uncle, Alex hated law enforcement and the justice system because he knew how broken it was and saw every single day the toll that such a job takes on a person. He knew all too well what dealing in death would do to someone because he watched it happen to his father. No matter how hard he tried, Nick could never get Alex to understand why he did what he did.

"One of the people that I killed was a serial killer. He shot me, then he was going to kill two other people if I hadn't shot him. I didn't have a choice, just like I didn't have a choice with the McCann kids either."

"Kids?" Alex asked in disbelief. "You killed two kids?"

"Two kids who were trying to kill the entire police department. Two kids who pulled guns on me as well as Catherine, Vartann, and Greg. Alex, I know you hate what I do. I know you hate what it involves, but you have to understand that I didn't have a choice. They were the murderers and they had to be stopped."

Alex shook his head. "You arrest them if you want to stop them, you don't kill them in return for what they've done. You're no better than they are just because you have a badge. You still killed three people dad."

"I know," Nick replied weakly. "I'm not proud of it, I hate that it had to come to that. But there was nothing else I could have done. If I hadn't done what I did, more people would have died. I would have died Alex."

"Maybe that was what was supposed to happen," Alex said before he even thought about what he was saying. Before his words could sink in too much, he added "What else have you kept from me?" continuing with his interrogation of his father. "You only told me that you were kidnapped and buried alive a few years ago and now I find out-"

"You don't want to know these things," Nick said firmly. "You already hate what I do enough, I don't want to tell you all these fucked up details. I don't want you to hate me."

"Lying to me doesn't change who you are."

"What does that mean?"

"It means that you don't have to tell me all of the bad things that have happened to you because you wear them on your sleeve whether you know it or not. You're so unhappy it's ridiculous and I can tell it's because you've been to hell and back and it just keeps getting worse. And it's because of your job. You come home and look like you were tortured for hours, and it's true. This job tortures you. You're not home sometimes for days at a time and when you are, you're barely ever you. You're so tired and so detached and so fucked up that you can't even function. And it all started when Warrick was killed."

"Don't," Nick said, his tone supposed to be firm but instead sounded more pleading than anything.

"You still blame yourself for his death and it governs everything that you say or do. You can't let go of anything."

"Have you let go?" Nick asked, trying to make Alex understand. "Have you let go of Colin, or Erik, or Warrick? Have you completely let go and accepted the fact that they're not here anymore and you're never going to see them or talk to them ever again? Have you let go of the fact that there was nothing you could have done to help any of them, no matter how much you wanted to? Have you?"

"No," Alex answered, still trying to keep his tough demeanor up. "But that's different. We're not talking about me, we're talking about you."

"Why can't we talk about you? You're affected by that just like I am. You won't eat or sleep for days after you've had a dream about Colin, or Erik, or Warrick. You watch all of the old videos and look at all of their pictures and listen to that CD Warrick made you for your last birthday before he died."

Alex shook his head slowly, tears building up in his eyes. "How do you know that?"

"Because you're my son," Nick replied. "And I love you. I know how you deal with things and I let you deal with them that way. I know you better than I know myself and I know that everything that has happened scares the shit out of you and it's not fair that you have to live that way."

"But there's nothing you can do about that," Alex added, filling in the blank. "Which is why I don't go to you when I have a dream about them. I can't because I know it'll only continue to remind you of what you already know and I know that there's nothing you can do to help me. Nothing can help me and I'm so fucking scared because I'm terrified that you're not the person I think you are."

"Who do you think I am?" Nick asked, afraid of the answer he was going to receive.

Alex laughed humorlessly. "I thought you were the guy who took care of everyone else and never asked for anything in return. I thought you were fearless and completely confident that even in this messed up world, you were doing something good. I thought you always fought for what you knew was right because nobody else was going to. I thought you were a hero, my hero. I thought you were my dad."

"And one thing you can't understand about my job changes all of that?" Nick asked. "You don't believe that any of that is true anymore because my job required me to kill three murderers in order to save other people's lives?"

"It's not about that anymore," Alex argued, immediately getting up and heading for the door as he felt emotion overtaking him.

"Then what is it about?"

"Everything!" Alex yelled suddenly as he turned around, startling himself and his dad. "When's the last time we hung out, just us, like we used to almost every damn day? When's the last time you made me skip school so we could play video games all day and go to the batting cages? When's the last time we watched a baseball game and just talked, the whole time, about anything and everything? Can you remember? Because I sure as hell can't. You work so much, and I know you're the good guy and you put criminals in jail but I don't need you to do that. So much awful stuff has happened and I've lost so many people...I don't know if I know who you are anymore, but whoever you are I'm scared to death that I'm losing you too."

Nick stood there and watched, completely helpless, as silent tears rolled down his only child's tired and broken eyes. He took a step towards Alex, who took a step back to try and keep his distance. Nick stood still again and willed the pain in his chest to go away so he could think clearly and figure out what he was going to say or do next.

"You're not losing me," Nick said finally, his voice quiet and soft. "I'm sorry Alex. I never meant for it to get like this and I should have done something sooner. You're right, I get too caught up in work and never know what to do about it. But you're not going to lose me because there's nowhere else I'd rather be than wherever you are. I'm sorry I made you feel the way I did, I never meant to. You know I'm not good at this stuff."

Alex shook his head. "No, you're not. You're great at catching the bad guy by finding the littlest piece of evidence and analyzing all of it and presenting it to a jury and making them believe every word that comes out of your mouth. But when it comes to everything else, it gets messed up."

Nick felt totally and completely lost. "What do you want from me?"

"I don't want anything from you," Alex replied, shrugging his shoulders slightly. "I just want you. I just want my dad."

"I didn't go anywhere," Nick said, his own tears threatening to make it harder for him to speak.

"You went with Warrick," Alex replied. "In your mind, you went with him that night out to his car in that alley and you think that that would have saved his life, but it wouldn't have. You wouldn't have scared McKean off, you would have enticed him more because he hates you just as much. He would have killed you too, and you know that. But you wish you had gone out there and died with him, so in your heart you did."

"You're wrong," Nick argued. "I know that there wasn't anything I could have done to save him, and thinking about it all the time wasn't doing me any good either. McKean would have killed me, and he probably would have gone after everyone else if he had had the chance to do it. But he didn't. I'm still here, and Warrick's not, and that sucks but it can't be changed. I'm sorry, for all of it, and you should be able to come to me to fix things. You're more important to me than work. You're more important to me than anything."

Alex smiled, but in sadness. "No I'm not," he said, his voice cold and broken. He turned and walked out of his father's office, leaving him standing there with what felt like a knife dug deep into his chest.

Alex didn't even make it all the way back out to his car in the garage before he was intercepted. He had wiped the tears away from his paled cheeks, but new ones started to surface when he saw Greg sitting on the hood of his car, waiting for him.

"Leave me alone," Alex said as soon as he was close enough to Greg.

"Isn't that what this is all about?" Greg asked. "You not wanting to be alone?"

Alex sighed heavily and pushed the button to unlock the doors. "Get off of my car," he said.

Greg laughed. "Come on kid," he said. "You know me better than that. I'm not going anywhere until you talk to me."

"Why?" Alex asked, very frustrated.

"Because there's some things that you need to hear," the older guy replied.

"Not from you," Alex retorted. He tried to open the door, but Greg swiftly moved from the hood to keep the door closed by standing in between Alex and the car, making the kid back up.

"Your dad loves you more than anything. You're more important to him than anything else. Stop shaking your head at me, you know I'm right. He hides all of the bullshit that is his life because he's protecting you, because he loves you. He doesn't want you to have to deal with what he goes through because you have enough on your plate as it is. You can't understand him because you can't understand what has happened to him. Nobody can, not even him."

"Can I go now?" Alex asked.

Greg shook his head. "No, because you still don't get it."

"What don't I get?"

"Why he's your dad." Before Alex could make a smart remark, Greg continued. "He's your dad because when you came here ten years ago with nothing but a note in your hand, he immediately took you in and took full responsibility for you because it was the right thing for him to do. He didn't care how it would affect him, he only cared that you were safe. He's your dad because whenever you were sick, he would stay home with you and do whatever he had to in order to make you feel even the slightest bit better. He's your dad because when you got into that fight at school after Erik died, he wasn't mad at you, he was worried about you because he loves you. He loves you so much that when Reskin almost killed you, he almost lost it because he almost lost you. He's your dad because no matter what, it always comes does to the fact that he will do anything for you."

"I know that," Alex muttered.

"You know it, but you don't understand it," Greg said. "You don't understand what that means."

"Yes I do," Alex argued. "I understand that it's the best thing that I've ever had and that without him, I would be dead. I know what a great person he is, that's what's bothering me."

"What do you mean?"

Alex shook his head slowly. "I don't know. It's messed up now. After Warrick died, everything changed. It was like the last straw. He's not the same person anymore, I feel like I don't even know who he is."

"You don't really believe that," Greg replied. "You're just saying that because you're scared. That's how you feel about yourself. You're not the same person anymore and you don't feel like you anymore. You've been through so much and now that you're older, it's all you can think about because you want to know how your life would be different, how you would be different."

Alex felt new tears flowing down his cheeks. "Why are you doing this? Why are you trying to make this my fault?"

"I'm not. I'm trying to help you understand."

"Understand what?" Alex demanded angrily.

"Understand you," Greg answered. "Take a good look at your dad, because that's going to be you soon enough. You guys may be different in a lot of ways, but you're the same in the important ways. You both care a ridiculous amount about the people around you and would do anything to protect them, and you both are very emotional because you can't help but care as much as you do. And you're both stubborn as hell and I'm astonished that you don't fight more than you do, because you're the same person."

"I'm not a murderer," Alex said flatly.

"Neither is your father."

Alex hung his head. "I know," he said in a defeated tone. "I shouldn't have said that to him, but I was so mad that he lied that I didn't know what else to do."

"You fought with him to get his attention," Greg stated.

Alex smiled slightly. "Childish, I know. I just got so sick and tired of feeling so..." he trailed off, not sure of what word to use.

"Numb," Greg finished for him.

Alex nodded weakly. "It just happens."

"Ya know who understands stuff like that?" Greg asked, smiling slyly. "Your dad."

Alex rolled his eyes, but smiled nonetheless. "I know."

"Good," Greg said, nodding and stepping to the side. "Now get outta here and go relax somewhere, you look terrible."

"Thanks," Alex said sarcastically, but then as Greg was about to walk away, Alex suddenly turned and hugged him. His gratitude may have been spoken in sarcasm, but his gesture was sincere.

Greg smiled as he shook his head at his friend's son, knowing that what he had said had actually helped him out. There was still a long way for Nick and Alex to go, but they would have to get their on their own terms.

* * *

Thanks again for reading, hopefully the next chapter will be up soon! Sorry again for the hiatus, hope everyone's still interested. =)


	29. Chapter 29

Nick sat down on the bench without saying a word. Alex didn't look at him or acknowledge his presence whatsoever for a very long time. They both just sat there in silence, lost in their own thoughts that were intertwined, even though they weren't voicing them at the moment. Neither one of them were looking around at the birds flying around or the other people bustling about the cemetery, everyone minding their own business. Both of the Stokes' that were sitting on the cool stone bench were staring at the tombstone in front of them that sadly read Warrick Brown.

"How did you know I was here?" Alex asked after almost an hour of them sitting there silently. The sun was just starting to set and it was going to get dark out fast.

Nick sighed. "Erik and Colin are in Texas," he replied sadly.

Alex tore his eyes away from the stone and looked at his father, who was still looking straight ahead. "How often do you come here?"

"More often than I come home I guess," Nick replied sarcastically, much to Alex's annoyance. "A couple times a week, pretty much whenever I can. Or have to."

Alex nodded slightly. "I've been here every day since it happened."

"I know."

Alex frowned. "If you know all of these things, why don't you ever say anything?"

"What am I supposed to say?" Nick asked.

Alex shook his head. "I don't know, something." He looked back at the name engraved forever on the gray stone. "I never got to say goodbye."

Nick looked over at his son, feeling his pain in his voice. "What would you have said?"

Alex took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "I would have told him how thankful I was for everything that he had done for me, all the times we hung out and he was there to talk to me. I would have told him that he was like a second father to me and without him, I don't know what I would have done. I don't know what I am going to do without him, everything feels so weird. So different."

"So empty," Nick added.

"Yeah," Alex agreed. "There's something missing in everything I do, in everything anyone does. You can tell, it's like the elephant in the room. I just can't shake it. Everything is altered because he was such a big part of everything."

"He knew," Nick replied helpfully. "He knew how you felt, how we all felt about him. It doesn't make it hurt any less, but it could have hurt more."

"How?" Alex asked.

"You could have finally gotten him to kick his drug habit, beat two murder raps, and finally got his feet back on the ground right before he was killed. You could have been sitting right next to him seconds before he was killed, but instead you hung back because he told you to get the number of the cute waitress that you weren't even interested in anyway. You could have fought with him and against him to get him back up from rock bottom, just in time to be murdered one hundred yards away from where you were sitting."

Alex swallowed the lump that had built in his throat as his dad was speaking. "I'm sorry," he said softly. "I didn't mean it like that I just meant-"

"I know," Nick said, cutting him off. "I didn't mean to make you feel bad, I was just rambling. I haven't really said any of that to anyone, other than him," he said, nodding to the grave stone slightly.

"You could have told me all of that before now," Alex said matter of factly.

"I didn't want to do that to you."

"Do what?"

"Give you more shit to deal with," Nick replied. "You've already got so much going on, you shouldn't have to worry about me."

Alex laughed slightly. "I think the same way about you. I see you all stressed out and destroyed over everything, I don't want to make anything worse."

"You wouldn't make anything worse," Nick said. "You're what keeps me sane. When I do go home, and you're there, I really can forget about everything else and relax and be happy. Being around you is normal and makes me feel normal, and I guess I'm so selfish that I didn't realize how negatively I was affecting you."

Alex shook his head. "You're not selfish at all. The most selfish thing I've ever seen you do was when you stole the last piece of pizza from Greg that night that we got kicked out of the movie theater. I get annoyed that you're so unselfish because it makes it that much harder for me to be mad at you."

"It seems it's gotten a little easier for you to do so lately," Nick said sadly. "But then I guess that just proves that it's my fault."

"It doesn't matter whose fault it is," Alex replied. "And besides, it's as much mine as it is yours. I know how stressful and demanding your job is, and I love that you're a bad ass that catches all the bad guys. But I hate that that means you could be killed at any given second."

Nick frowned. "Is that what this is all about?" he asked. "You're afraid I'm going to die?"

Alex sighed heavily. "It's a big part of it. I just hate it when you get stuck at work for days at a time because you can't stop working on some cases until you solve them and half the time I trick myself into thinking something happened to you. And I know it's selfish and stupid and childish, but I can't help it. I don't want to lose you too because then my entire life is over. I think about how much it sucks without Warrick, and then I freak out because it would be a million times worse if you died. What am I going to do if you die?"

"You'll be fine," Nick said, for lack of better words to say.

"Fine?" Alex scoffed. "How the hell am I gonna be fine if you die?"

"I mean, like, financially and everything."

Alex shook his head. "What are you talking about?"

"If something happens to me, I can't do anything to help you through that, obviously, because I won't be here. That will be Greg and Catherine's jobs, who are your guardians by the way. It was Cath and Warrick..." he trailed off for a second before continuing. "I have a life insurance policy. If I die, you get everything. All the money, the house, my car. Everything is already taken care of so you don't have to worry about it."

Alex shook his head slowly. "How long have you had this set up?"

"Pretty much since you started living with me," Nick replied. "If anything happens to me, everything is yours. You're eighteen now, so it all goes directly to you instead of to Cath and Greg until you were old enough. You're the sole beneficiary. Cath and Greg's only job is to make sure you spend the money to go to a good college and to look after you."

"How much money?" Alex asked, not out of greed but out of pure curiosity and astonishment at his dad's revelation.

"One million," Nick replied in all seriousness. "Enough to go to a good college, even grad school, and to make sure you'd be set for a while until you got a good job and could handle things on your own."

Alex was in disbelief. "When were you going to tell me about this?"

"I wasn't," Nick said with a sigh. "I know how much you hate all of this stuff, thinking about it and especially talking about it. I didn't want you to worry. I should have told you, I'm sorry. There's a lot I should have told you, I just never had the heart to I guess. I hate thinking about who I am and everything that entails, never mind trying to explain it to you."

"I'm never going to hate you," Alex replied. "No matter what you've done or do, I can't hate you. You're the only reason I'm still alive, and there's nothing you can do to alter how dependent I am on you. I know we sound like an old married couple most of the time, but I really don't care."

Nick laughed. "Warrick used to tell me that all the time. He said it was like watching Abbott and Costello go at it."

"I really miss him," Alex said, smiling sadly. "If he had heard us fighting today he would have locked us in until we figured everything out."

"Yeah, well, we would have been in there for a long time. It's gonna take forever to figure half of this shit out," Nick said. "Which reminds me, you have to stop swearing too much."

"You know I get it from you, right?"

"That's my point. "You're getting far too much like me far too quickly."

"That's what Greg told me," Alex said. "He told me to take a good look at you because you're who I'm going to before I know it."

Nick shook his head slowly. "I don't want you to be like me. That's not good enough."

"What do you want me to be then?" Alex asked in annoyance.

"I want you to be you because you're smarter than me. You're a better person than I am and you're far more ambitious. You can honestly be anything that you want because you're smart enough and you'll work hard enough if you really want it. Don't be like me, you're so much better than that."

"How am I smarter than you? You're a science genius that can catch bad guys by finding evidence that half the time isn't even visible to anyone else. Your lab is the best in the country and you're basically the best at it so that makes you one of the smartest people in America. I would be lucky to-"

"Do you want to be like me?" Nick asked, cutting Alex off. "Knowing everything you do about me, do you want to be anything like me? Because from our conversation earlier, you hate who and what I am and want nothing to do with it."

"I don't hate you," Alex replied. "I didn't mean it like that, I just meant that-"

"That you hate who my job makes me be. Tired, stressed, over worked. Negligent of my only child. It's clear that most things about me piss you off, so why would you want to be anything like me?"

Alex stared at his father dead in the eye. "Because despite your crazy job, you never put yourself before me. You never intentionally do anything to hurt me, which is more than I can say for anyone else who has ever been in charge of me. My mother tries to kill me every time she sees me. Her boyfriend molested me. Multiple times. I want to be like you because you're the exact opposite of everyone else that has ever taken care of me. You care about me the way that a parent should, and I hope that if I ever have kids I can be half the father that you are. I hope that-"

"You're just a kid, you don't understand. You don't-"

"Will you let me finish a god damn sentence?" Alex said, cutting his dad off after he had done so to him for the third time. "I know I'm just a kid, I'm your kid. So I know who you really are."

"A murderer," Nick said, echoing Alex's words from before.

Alex shook his head. "I didn't mean that, you know I didn't mean that. I lashed out at you because I was mad that there was something about you that I didn't know about. I hate it when I don't know things because before I came here I didn't understand anything and I didn't have control over anything. I was a little kid and everybody around me took advantage of that, but you never did. But then I find out these things about you and it scares me that I'm losing control over the only thing I've ever had some sort of control over."

Nick leaned forward so his arms were resting on his knees, his eyes locked on the grave stone in front of him. "I don't know what you want me to do," he said softly.

Alex shook his head and stood up. "I don't want you to do anything," he responded. "Since clearly you don't want to have to do anything." Alex turned to walk away, but was stopped when Nick stood up and grabbed his arm, keeping him in place. "What are you gonna do, hit me?" he asked accusingly.

Nick released Alex's arm. "Yeah, I'm gonna hit you. Everything you know about me would lead you to believe that I would do something to intentionally hurt you. You act so tough that I didn't realize I was hurting you. So yeah, punching you right now is clearly my best course of action."

"Maybe if you weren't so sarcastic to me all the time I wouldn't be such a smart ass," Alex shot back. "Maybe if you talked to me like I was your son and not a murder suspect we would be able to have a mature conversation."

Nick shook his head. "We can't have a mature conversation because neither one of us is mature enough to just flat out say how we feel and what we want and need. You may get that from me, but you use it a hell of a lot better than I do."

"So this is my fault?" Alex asked, collapsing back down onto the cold stone bench.

Nick sat down next to his son, closer than before. "Of course it's not. That's not what I mean."

"Then what do you mean?"

"I mean that you need to know that you can come to me and tell me anything. You can tell me how pissed you are at me for being too busy with work and not watching bad movies with you at three in the morning or attempting to cook dinner with you when we both know we're just going to set the fire alarm off. You can tell me that you're afraid I'm going to die and that you don't feel like you used to feel because I understand all of that. Unfortunately, we've both been through very similar ordeals and it sucks, but there's nothing we can do to change it."

"It's changed me," Alex said. "All this shit that's happened, it changed me. You changed me, and now I feel like you're changing and I don't want you to because I don't want anything else to change anymore."

"It's normal to be changed by what happens to you," Nick explained. "The trick is to be changed, but not ruined by it. The things that you've been through in the short amount of time that you've been alive is more than most people will ever have to handle. And you've gotten through all of it. There's nothing you can't handle as long as you keep reminding yourself how strong you really are."

"How much stronger am I gonna have to be?" Alex asked softly.

Nick sighed sadly. "I can't answer that. I wish I could. I wish there was something I could say to erase everything, but there isn't. My job isn't to erase the past, but help you get through it so you can be ready for the future. You have such a bright future Alex, you can't let yourself get scared away from it."

"I know," Alex said as he let out a long breath. "But I don't want to be a bitchy needy little kid. I don't want you to have to look after me all the time and fix everything that is going to go wrong in my life. I'm scared to lose you because I'm scared of how much I need you."

"Hey," Nick said gently, putting his hand on Alex's knee. "You may not want it, but I'm always going to look out for you. There's nothing you can do to stop that because you can't stop me from loving you, and it's my job to protect you. I'll fix anything that you want me to fix and let you handle whatever you want to handle alone. But you need to know that you never, ever have to go through anything alone. Whether it's failing a test or something bigger, I'm here. Even when you don't want me to be."

Alex looked at his dad through the tears in his eyes. "I want you to be here. I get mad at you, but that's because I miss you. I miss you, and you're right here, but you're not. I wish I was a little kid again and you were letting me stay up late to watch Red Sox games and pulling me out of school to go fishing and there was no one threatening to ruin any of that. But I grew up, and we both went through so much that we're not the same people we were before."

"That doesn't necessarily mean we're worse off," Nick offered. "We've been through a lot, but despite how you feel right now it made us closer. Tragedies have a funny way of doing that. With everything I see I appreciate and love you more and more because I am constantly reminded of how lucky I am that you're my son. When you showed up at the lab that day, my life was irreparably changed, and I couldn't' be happier about it because it made my life better than anything else ever could."

Alex swallowed hard so he was able to speak. "I don't know what to do," he said weakly.

Nick smiled. "Go home. Eat something, take a shower, and go to bed. I'll be right behind you, and we can figure everything else out when we wake up."

"Okay," Alex said with a slight nod.

He turned and walked down the hill to his car, started it, but didn't drive away. Nick continued to sit on the bench, staring at Warrick's name. He was aware that Alex had not yet driven away, and was about to turn around and see what was wrong when he felt his cell phone vibrate. He took it out of his pocket and frowned when he saw that it was a text from Alex. Nick smiled as he read the words _I love you too dad_ and was about to stand up when he heard Alex's car finally pull away and head off towards their home. Nick turned around and watched as it disappeared around the corner before heading back to his car to follow suit, his cell phone still open in his hand displaying the message his son had just sent to him.


	30. Chapter 30

Alex got right into the shower as soon as he got home. As he was turning the water on, he heard the front door open and then close as his dad was returning home as well. He heard him go into the kitchen, presumably to make something for them to eat. Alex took off his clothes, letting them fall to the floor in a heap. He stood still under the hot stream of water, letting it wash over him and soothe his aching muscles and overall tired body. He closed his eyes and let the water pour over his head and run all over, slowly and effectively relaxing him. He stood there, not thinking or moving hardly at all for a little over a half an hour before the water started running cooler, signaling that it was probably a good idea for him to get out now.

Alex got out of the shower, grabbed his towel and headed into his room. He dried off quickly before dressing in his favorite pair of dark gray sweatpants and a worn out black t-shirt. As he was leaving his room, he caught a glimpse of himself in his mirror. He didn't stop to look, however, because even that quick look showed him how worn down and tired he looked. He felt better after the long shower, but new the exhaustion that he was wearing on his face hadn't been completely washed away by the hot water.

He walked down the hall and into the living room, where he saw his dad sitting on the couch in front of the television with a pizza on the coffee table along with two cherry cokes. Alex sat down on the couch at the opposite end of his dad.

"We don't have any food here, do we," Alex stated more than asked.

Nick shook his head with a small smile. "Of course we don't. We can got to the store later, I don't feel like it now."

"I don't feel like doing anything now," Alex said as he grabbed a slice of pizza, happily biting into it.

They sat there in comfortable silence, eating their pizza, drinking their sodas and watching Sports Center play the highlights of all of the games that they had missed from the night before. Here or there one of them would throw out a comment about one of the top plays or something, but for the most part they just sat there and relaxed for the first time in a long time.

After almost an hour, Nick got up, brought the pizza into the kitchen and then headed for the bathroom. "I'm gonna jump in the shower," he called back to Alex. "You should try and get some sleep kid."

With that Nick went into his bathroom in his room and got into the shower. Alex sighed heavily as he turned off the television and got off of the couch. He forced his tired legs to carry him down the hall, not to his room but to his father's. He crawled into Nick's king size bed, pulling the comfortable blankets around him and snuggling into their warmth. His eyes wanted to close, but he wouldn't allow them to. He instead focused them on a picture of Warrick, Nick and himself that was on the dresser by the door. They remained transfixed there, even when Nick returned from the shower and without question or hesitation climbed into the other side of the bed, letting the blankets welcome him warmly.

"Did you get a chance to say goodbye?" Alex asked, his eyes still fixed on the picture of the three of them, Alex in the middle, smiling happily at a cookout a few months before Warrick had died.

Nick sighed. "Kind of. Not in the way that I would have if I had known it was goodbye. I told him that I was really glad that he was okay and that I would call him later. Not really good enough."

"What would you have said?" Alex asked, using Nick's question from before on him.

"I would have told him that I was sorry all of this had to happen and that it wasn't fair. I would have made sure he knew he was my best friend and always will be. I'd thank him for being so supportive and helpful with you, even when everyone else thought it was a bad idea. And even though we fought and disagreed on a regular basis, he was one of the most important people in my life, and still is. I would have told him that he was a great CSI, an even better friend, and that I loved him and I miss him like crazy."

"He knew," Alex said softly. "He told me all the time how lucky I was that you were my dad and that I should never forget that."

Nick looked from the picture over to his son. "He would be so proud of you," he said.

Alex shook his head slowly, but was still looking at the picture. "Why?" he asked.

"Because you're so smart and so strong," Nick explained. "He would love the fact that you're fighting with me because it shows how much you care and how responsible you are. He'd love that you aren't just sitting in your room, letting everything happen that you don't want to. He'd love how stubborn and persistent you are."

"Because that's how you are," Alex added, looking over at his dad. "And if I'm like you, then I'm going to be okay."

Nick smiled. "I sure as hell hope so," he replied. "But even he would agree that there's a lot of things about me that he wouldn't want for you. You can be like me, I guess I can't really stop that, but I can stop you from making the same mistakes I made."

"Yeah yeah yeah," Alex said. "You drank when you were a teenager and had one night stands. One of which resulted in me. Nothing you've done is shocking or worse than anything anyone else has ever done. You act like-"

"I slept with a hooker," Nick said, cutting his son off again as he looked up at the ceiling. "I was working a case, a long time ago, and let it go when I caught this hooker, Kristy, drugging and robbing her clients. Then she got in trouble a couple times and called me to get her out of it. I gave her a ride home, went in for a drink, and slept with her. Then I left. When I went by the next morning to take her to breakfast, the coroner was there. She had been murdered, by her pimp, because of me. I was the prime suspect. Luckily, Catherine proved I was innocent and caught the guy that did it."

Alex didn't know what he was supposed to say, so he didn't say anything. "She told me that she was going back to school so she would be able to have a better life, and I believed her. Until her pimp told me that she was going back to school to recruit more girls. I guess it didn't matter, she used me either way. And I used her. I don't really know why, all I know is that I never want to feel like I did that day, and I never want you to ever feel like I have most of my life."

Alex sat up, still looking at his father. "I'm gonna make mistakes," he said softly. "I'm gonna do stupid things, get myself hurt, take crazy chances. And do you know why I'm gonna do all of that?" Nick didn't answer, he just kept staring up at the dark ceiling. "Because of you. Because you showed me what it means to actually be loved and wanted and taken care of, and as a result of that I want to continue to be happy. So I'm going to take chances, put myself out there, and it's not always going to work out the way that I want it to. I've gotten used to the fact that my life isn't going to be normal, perfect, or neat. It's always going to be fucked up, crazy and messy. And I'm okay with that, because this is the life you've given me. I'm okay with that, I'm happy about it and I want you to be happy about it too."

"I am," Nick replied, sitting up as well and looking over at his son. "I don't want you to think that I'm not proud of you or that I think you're going to grow up to be a delinquent. I know you won't, I know you're going to grow up to be a great man. I just want to make sure that you know that too."

"I do, because you always remind me."

Nick smiled as he ran a hand through his hair. "I'm really tired," he said, stifling a yawn. "Let's go to sleep. Maybe more of this will continue to make more sense with some rest."

Alex nodded in agreement. "I can get on board with that."

* * *

Thanks those still reading...not sure if I'm going to continue with this story any time soon, if at all. Thoughts? Hope you enjoyed!


	31. Chapter 31

Alex couldn't say that things had necessarily gotten better with his dad, but they definitely hadn't gotten worse. They were spending a lot more time together, which he liked, even though that did lead to the two of them arguing more. But Alex didn't really mind that; he'd prefer arguing with him over not talking to him at all. They mostly argued over the same things anyway; Alex getting in trouble at school for mouthing off to teachers, Nick working more than he said he was going to, cases affecting him to the point where he brought that emotion home, and Alex still wishing that everything could just go back to the way that it used to be. The last few days had been fine, and as Alex was currently walking to the front door of his house on his way home from school he was thinking about how much he was looking forward to later that night because Nick had the night off and they had been planning to go get a pizza and then go to the movies for the first time in a long time.

But when Alex walked through the front door and saw his father, he assumed that those plans would be changing.

Nick was sitting on the couch, staring down at the floor as if it were hiding the answer to a case that he just couldn't solve. Alex thought at first that maybe there was a case file down there, but as he closed the door and walked into the living room, he saw that there was nothing there but the wood floor. He gripped the strap of his backpack that was hanging off of his left shoulder tightly, noting that the blank expression on his dad's face wasn't a good thing. The older man hadn't even looked up when Alex opened the door or walked into the room, so he was either too lost in his thoughts to have noticed or he didn't want to see or speak to his son.

"Dad?" Alex said weakly to make his father look up at him, but he didn't. Alex felt his heart rate accelerating because he knew that whatever was wrong was bad. Nick had only ever acted this strange once before, and it had been the night that Warrick had died and he had had to tell his son that he was gone.

Alex dropped his backpack off of his shoulder and sat on the coffee table across from Nick, who kept his eyes diverted. "What's wrong?" Alex asked. "You're scaring me."

Nick sighed heavily as looked up at Alex and leaned back against the couch, his body language expressing a manner of complete defeat. "I don't know if it's even a bad thing," Nick said, his voice so low Alex barely heard him.

"What is it?" Alex demanded.

"Your mom died," Nick stated in lieu of dragging it out and due to lack of better words to say.

Alex felt the air in his lungs that he had been holding suddenly rush out upon the realization that nothing bad had happened to Greg or Sara or anything else that his dad worked with. After being relieved that none of them had gotten hurt, the teenager was then confused regarding how he should feel about what his dad had just told him.

"Oh," he replied lamely. "How did you find out?"

"Chelsea called me," Nick answered. "She heard from their friends from high school."

"How did she die?" Alex asked hesitantly.

"Car accident," Nick said. "She died last night, Chelsea called me about an hour ago right after she found out."

Alex nodded slowly. "Was she upset?"

"Yeah, she was. She mostly remembers her as her friend in high school that was pretty and sweet and got along with everyone. She knows everything she did to you, but I guess that's just what I turned her into," Nick said sadly.

"It wasn't your fault that she was a crazy, sadistic person."

"She wasn't like that until after she met me," Nick replied.

Alex shook his head in disagreement. "Warrick wasn't like her, and he knew you a hell of a lot longer than she did. Greg isn't like that, neither is Catherine, Sara, hell, Hodges isn't even like that. The only person that has come into contact with you that acted the way my mom did was her. Everything that happened was her fault, not yours. You didn't do anything wrong."

"I got drunk at my brother's wedding and slept with someone whose name I didn't even know until our son showed up at my lab eight years later," Nick retorted.

"If you hadn't had done that, I wouldn't be sitting here right now," Alex said. "You told me before that you didn't regret what happened, that you wouldn't go back and change anythign if you could because you got me out of it. Now you're telling me you changed your mind, and you wish things had been different?"

Nick nodded. "Yes, I wish things had been different. I wish I had dated and fallen in love with a great woman so that when you were born you would have had a loving mother that would take care of you and raise you to be a good man. I wish that you had had a normal life, the life that you deserve."

"I didn't have any of that because I had something better," Alex said, emotion controlling his voice. "I didn't have a great mom who cared about me, I had one who tried to kill me on multiple occasions because I reminded her of you. I have you, the only person in this entire world that has loved me unconditionally since the minute you saw me. I have a complicated, messy life that teaches me something new every day because I have a great dad who refuses to give up on me no matter how much I piss him off or act like an idiot because I'm scared to lose another aspect of my hectic life."

"Why don't you understand that you could have had a better life than this one?" Nick asked rhetorically, because he continued before Alex could answer. "I could have given you up for adoption so that a normal family could have taken you in so you wouldn't have had to grow up in Vegas and see a lot of the things and people that you love die. You could have had anything that you wanted from a family that could have given you everything that you needed, but you didn't because I was selfish and didn't want to give you up. And I fucked everything up."

The younger Stokes stood up, holding his hands out by his sides. "Am I really that bad?" he wanted to know. "Do you dislike who I am that much that you wish that you had given me up for adoption? I know I'm not the perfect son and that I argue with you all the time and get in trouble at school more than I should, but I still get good grades. I don't drink, I don't do drugs, and have never even talked to a hooker. For a teenage guy living in Vegas, that's a uniquely clean track record. So what do you want me to do? I'll sit in school and shut up, get straight A's and go to Harvard if you want."

Nick shook his head, still sitting on the couch. "That's not what I want."

"Then what the hell do you want?"

"For you to be happy," he answered as if it were the simplest thing in the world. "Ever since that day you were sitting in the lobby, that's all I've ever wanted and it's what I've been trying to accomplish every single day, but I can't do it. Nothing I can say or do can make you happy because this isn't the life that you should have and I know that you know that," Nick said as he stood from the couch so that now he was standing taller than his son. "I can see it in your eyes every single day. Every time we get in a fight about my job or you getting in trouble or whatever else, I can see the wheels turning."

Alex scoffed. "You caught me dad. All I do all day is think about how much I'd rather be somewhere else other than here even though this is the only place that I've ever felt safe," he said, shaking his head slowly. "Why do you think so little of yourself?"

"I've got a lot of evidence to back it up," Nick retorted. "But it's mostly because of how much you ha-"

"How much I hate you?" Alex interrupted, stealing his father's usual tactics and using it against him. "You really think that I hate you, or anything about you?"

"You hate my job," Nick fought back.

"Because it could kill you!" Alex exclaimed. "Your job could take you away from me at any second, it does all the time, but never completely. Almost, but never completely. But because of your job, you could be killed by a suspect or a pissed off criminal or even the under sherriff apparently. That's why I hate your job, but I don't hate you. I could never hate you. I know we fight all the time, and I usually start it, but it's because I would rather fight with you than not have anything else to say. I don't want to ask about your cases because I know most of them haunt you enough as it is and I don't want to make it any worse. I start fights with you to see if you'll fight back so that I'll at least know that you still care."

Alex turned away from his dad and walked around the coffee table towards the hallway. He was planning on disappearing into his room, maybe jumping out the window and escaping out into the woods behind their house for a little while as he sometimes did when he was overly stressed and couldn't talk to his dad because, well, his dad was the reason he was so stressed. He felt like he couldn't make his father understand that he loved him, and thought that maybe that was his own fault. He shouldn't be so hard on someone who has done so much for him. Everything Nick does, he does for his son. Alex knows that, it's just hard to deal with it all sometimes.

"I'm scared."

His dad's words were uttered in such a quiet manner that Alex thought that maybe he wasn't meant to have heard them and was going to keep on walking away, but his legs stopped working and he became rooted to the spot. He was only a few feet away from his doorway. He didn't turn around to face hid father, but he didn't keep walking away either.

Nick took Alex's silence and sudden ceasing of movement as an answer. "I'm scared that one day, you're going to wake up and resent me for everything that's happened to you here. All the pain you've been through is because of me, and it's only a matter of time before you realize that. I'm scared that you're eventually going to actually hate me."

Alex turned around slowly, his heart sinking at the sincerity he saw in his dad's eyes that matched the tone of his voice telling Alex his dad believed everything he had just said. "No matter what you do, nothing will ever make me hate you. I know everything there is to know about you, and I don't hate you. You hate you, but I don't. I love you, and I'm sorry that I don't tell you that enough or do anything to make you believe me, but it's true. I'm happier here than I could ever be anywhere else because you're my dad and you love me no matter what, and nothing else can replace that. Maybe you want something to, but I don't."

Instead of turning around again and walking away, Alex walked back over to his father and pulled him into a tight hug. Nick was at such a loss for words that he was unable to return the embrace, and before he knew it Alex was walking away again, this time towards the front door and leaving the house altogether. He stood there in the same spot and listened as Alex's car started and left the driveway before driving down the street. Nick wished that he had been able to hug Alex back. He wished that he had held onto him and not let him walk away. He wished that he had followed him out of the house and kept him from leaving.

He had no idea just how much he was going to wish that he had kept his son from leaving.


	32. Chapter 32

Nick saw the confused expression on Brass' face before he heard his cell phone start ringing. He removed it from his pocket and looked at it to which his own confused expression took over his facade when he saw that it was Brass who was calling him. Nick looked back up at the police captain, who was still holding his cell phone to his ear and was staring at the CSI with what appeared now to be a pained expression. Nick had no idea why Brass would be standing outside the door to the morgue, and now that he was looking up and around at his surroundings, he was wondering why Super Dave and Doc Robbins were standing around as well.

"What's up?" Nick asked Brass as he slid his still ringing cell phone back into his pocket.

Brass finally hung up his phone but kept it in his hand, clutching it at his side. "How did you know to come down here?"

Nick frowned in even further confusion. "I came down to get the results from the autopsy on my case," Nick replied. "Why else would I be down here?" The Texan watched helplessly as the color drained out of Brass' face as he looked like he was about to be sick to his stomach. "What's going on?" he asked, turning to Doc and Dave as well for answers, but they both kept their teary eyes turned down at the cold floor.

Brass inhaled sharply so he could speak. "There was an accident," he said gently, slowly taking a few steps towards Nick with his hands held up as if to ease what he was about to say with his arms. Nick felt his heart jump into his throat. Somehow he knew what Brass was going to say even before he figured out how to say it. "Alex's car was found on the strip. It looks like it was an attempted car-jacking."

"Where is he?" Nick asked, not caring about any other information.

"The CSIs that responded are from days, they don't know Alex that well," Brass continued, avoiding the other man's question.

"Where is my son?" Nick asked, wanting to sound stern but his voice coming out faint and weak.

Brass sighed heavily. "There was a body inside that fits Alex's description. No ID was found on the body, but the wallet in the car was Alex's."

Nick was fairly certain that his heart had stopped beating altogether by this point. "Where is Alex?" he asked again, his voice barely audible.

Brass glanced over his shoulder at the door of the morgue which was apparently being guarded by Doc and Dave. They couldn't bring themselves to go inside, but they also wouldn't desert their post until Nick had gotten there to take care of what no one else could. The older man closed the gap completely and firmly placed his hands on Nick's shoulders to steady him.

"We don't know if it's him," Brass said as calmly as possible. "No one's been inside but the day shift coroner. That's why I was calling you," he explained.

Nick shook his head. "It can't be him. He was just at home not even two hours ago. He left, but he was fine. He's fine, right?"

Brass felt heavy tears stinging his eyes. "The body was found a little over an hour ago. They need you to identify the body Nick."

The CSI acted as if Brass hadn't said anything after he had asked if Alex was fine or not. He took out his cell phone and pressed it to his ear as it was dialing Alex's number. It rang and rang and rang until finally his voice-mail picked up. Upon hearing Alex's voice say to leave a message and he'd get back to you, tears started falling from Nick's eyes. Little did he know that the day shift CSIs working on the case who were in the layout room back at the lab with Alex's phone ringing in front of them were fighting back their own tears when they saw the teenager's dad attempting to get a hold of him.

Nick hung up and was about to dial again when Brass took his phone away from him. "You have to go in there Nicky," he said softly.

Nick shook his head again. "I can't," he said, his voice breaking with emotion. "What am I going to do if it's him? I can't lose him Jim, you know I can't."

"You can do this," Brass reassured him. He was trying his hardest to keep himself together, but knew it was a battle he was about to lose. "You can do it Nick."

Brass maneuvered Nick and gave him a push, sending him forward and off balance so that he didn't have a choice but to step forward. Once he did, his feet carried him past Dave and Doc, who were still looking down at the floor, all the way to the door. It was there that he paused, unable to lift his arm to push open the door. He peered in through the window and saw the day shift coroner looking back at him, standing behind the body covered by a white sheet that was lying deadly still on the pull out drawer. Nick tried to swallow the lump in his throat so he could breathe better, but that only choked him up more. He looked down at his unsteady feet and lifted his right arm and pushed through the door, keeping his head down and walking what seemed like an entire mile until his vision was finally focused on the plane of white.

The coroner didn't speak a word. He simply lifted the white sheet and drew it back to reveal the young face with dark brown hair. The next thing Nick saw was Brass' face again, this time extremely close to his own as he was shaking the younger man to try and get his attention.

"It's not Alex," Nick said, his voice the steadiest it had been since he had seen Brass calling him.

Brass' expression turned to one of an odd mixture of relief and confusion. "Are you sure?" he asked hesitantly.

"If I had just seen my son's dead body lying on a slab, do you think I would have been able to walk out here and talk to you like this?" Nick asked. His fear from before was now replaced with anxiety at figuring out what had happened and where Alex was.

Brass finally snapped out of his trance, realizing that Nick was right. "Did you recognize who it was?"

Nick shook his head. "I have no idea, I've never seen him before. He looks too old to be someone Alex knows from school or something, but he could know him somehow. I don't know who he is or why he was found dead in Alex's car, but I don't care about that right now. All I care about is finding out where the hell he is."

"Alex is at Desert Palm," DB announced as he exploded into the hallway of the morgue. The shock that should have come from the sudden entrance of the supervisor was put at the back burner upon finding out that Alex was in the hospital.

"Is he okay?" Nick asked as he began heading for the door, DB and Brass hot on his heels.

"They wouldn't tell me over the phone because I'm not you," DB reported. "I tried to lie but all they would tell me is he's in surgery. They're waiting for you at the hospital," he said, calling over Nick's shoulder as the younger man ran to his car. Somehow DB beat him there, snatching the keys from his hands and motioning for Nick to get in the passenger seat. "Might be better if I drive," he said with a small reassuring smile.

Nick didn't waste time arguing.

* * *

For the second time during the duration of his fatherhood, Nick was looking at his son lying in a hospital bed in less than perfect condition. The overwhelming pressure he was feeling on his chest at the moment felt like the hug that his son had given him earlier in the day was being amplified to cause pain due to the fact that Nick had neglected to hug him back. He shoulder have grabbed his son and never let him go.

"He was hit by a car," DB explained as he walked up alongside Nick, following his gaze in to the young man in the room. "Johnson, the kid that was found in Alex's car, stole money from some drug dealers and was trying to get away fast. He pulled a gun on Alex when he was stopped at a red light. He broke the window, hit him in the head and opened the door. He pulled him out and threw him into the street in front of a moving car. He broke four ribs and has a severe concussion. They had to remove his appendix because they were afraid it was going to burst due to the pressure, but he's going to be okay."

When Nick didn't make any form of a reply, DB turned to him and put his hand on his shoulder, making his CSI look over at him. "He's going to be okay Nick."

"A few years ago, when Alex was sixteen, he was in a car accident. But it wasn't an accident. The guy that hit him, Reskin, kidnapped him because I had put his son in jail. Reskin thought his son was innocent and wanted to get back at me by killing Alex," Nick said. He turned his head again so he was looking at his son and avoiding DB's piercing gaze. "He almost killed him, because of me. And then today we got in another fight and he left, and almost got killed. Again. Because of me. What if next time..." Nick trailed off, unable to voice the thought that haunted him every single day.

DB shook his head. "You can't think like that as a parent Nick," he said soothingly. "I worry about my kids every second of every day, and our jobs don't make that easier. But I know that I can trust them to not put themselves in any dangerous situations and that they can always come to me for help before things get worse. I'm not going to stand here and tell you how to raise your son, because I think you're doing a great job, but things are always going to get worse before they get better. It's not fair, and it's not easy, but it's how it is. It's how you handle it that counts."

With that DB dropped his hand from Nick's shoulder and walked away, knowing that the younger man was about to go into the hospital room and sit with his son until he woke up. There was nothing more anyone else could say or do at this point; what happened next was up to Alex and Nick.

Nick silently opened the door and closed it behind him. He stood there for a few moments, his hand behind his back still gripping the handle to the door. He steadied his breathing as he looked at Alex, and it wasn't long before he was drawn over to stand next to his bedside. Nick looked down at his son, cringing at the sight of the jagged gash on the left side of his forehead that ran from above his eyebrow to his cheek. But other than that, he looked fairly okay. He knew that there would be bruises and pain from his broken ribs, not to mention concussion, _but it could have been a lot worse_ Nick thought to himself as he had an uncontrollable flashback to the dead body that resembled his son lying in the morgue. Nick literally shook his head to rid his mind of the image before pulling up the uncomfortable chair and sitting in it to await Alex waking up.


	33. Chapter 33

Alex slowly opened his eyes despite the overwhelming urge he was feeling to just go back to sleep. He felt numb and extremely groggy, but really didn't know why. He opened his eyes out of hopes of figuring out what was going on, and when the haze around his brain cleared and he honed in on the dim lighting and gentle beeping of the machines he was connected to, he realized he was in the hospital. Again. The dull throbbing in his head reminded him of the crazed junkie that had stolen his car from him before throwing him into oncoming traffic, inevitably putting him in the bed he was currently in. He sighed, but upon doing so was met with a sharp pain in his ribs that knocked all the wind out of his lungs. He gasped and squeezed his eyes shut against the shooting pain, making it impossible for him to see that his dad was sitting in the chair next to his bed, having just woken up himself after hearing Alex stir.

Nick didn't know what to do, so he just sat there and watched his son suffer. His heart was heavy with guilt, making it impossible for him to breathe, speak, or even move. When Alex finally controlled his breathing and minimized the pain, he opened his eyes and immediately saw his dad sitting in the chair to his left.

"Do you want me to get the nurse?" Nick asked. His voice was quiet and strained thanks to the lump in his throat.

Alex shook his head. "No," he replied, his voice heavy and laced with sleep. "I'm fine."

Nick watched as his son tore his eyes away from his and looked up at the ceiling, obviously concentrating on keeping his breathing slow and even in order to keep the pain in his ribs at bay. Eventually, he closed his eyes and his chest was rising slowly and steadily, giving the Nick the impression that he had fallen asleep. It wasn't until Alex spoke that Nick thought differently.

"I'm sorry," he said so softly that Nick had barely heard him.

"For what?" Nick asked. He leaned forward until his elbows rested on his knees so that he was as close to Alex as possible and would be able to hear him.

"I shouldn't have just left like that," he replied. "I just didn't want to get in a fight with you again, so I left because I was scared of what was going to happen."

"What did you think was going to happen?" Nick asked. He wished that Alex would look at him so he could get a better read of how his son was truly feeling.

Alex would have shrugge, but he was in enough pain as it was and knew movement would only add to it. "I don't know, I was just afraid to find out I guess. You said that you were scared, and that scared me. You're never scared, you're not supposed to be. You always know what to do and how to figure everything out. You're so good at making everything okay, making it all make sense, but the fact that you were scared made me think that everything wasn't going to be okay. I don't want you to be scared because of me."

"I'm not scared because of you," Nick replied. "I'm scared for you."

Alex opened his eyes, but didn't look over at his father. "What does that mean?"

"They found your car," Nick responded, not immediately answering the question. "The guy that stole it from you, he stole drugs or money or something from some people. They found him and killed him, and just let him in your car. When the cops found it, they found your wallet inside and thought it was you."

Alex swallowed hard and closed his eyes again as his father continued. "I had to go to the morgue and identify the body. They all thought that it was you in there. I called your phone, and when you didn't answer, I thought it was you in there too. For about five minutes or so, from when Brass told me they found a body in your car to when I finally went into the morgue and saw who it really was, I thought I had lost you. Those were the worst five minutes of my life. Worse than when I was buried alive and contemplating whether or not to kill myself, worse than when Colin died, worse than when Warrick died. Those five minutes that I didn't have you for, I swear they almost killed me."

Alex shook his head slowly. "You're scared for yourself, not for me," he said. He wasn't trying to imply that Nick was selfish; it's perfectly understandable to be scared to lose you child. Alex didn't understand what Nick had meant, and therefore tried to change what Nick had said in order for it to make more sense to him.

"Of course I am," Nick replied, "but not as much for myself as I am for you."

"What are you talking about?" Alex asked, beginning to grow frustrated that his dad wouldn't just come right out and say what he meant.

"If I lost you, it would be by far the worst thing that has ever happened to me," Nick explained. "I wouldn't be able to handle it, not at all. But not entirely because I would lose the most important thing to me. There's so much more to it than that."

"Like what?"

Nick really wished Alex would just look at him. "You not being able to continue to grow up and go on to do all the great things I know you're going to," he finally answered. "If I lost you, everyone would lose something. That would be the real tragedy. I don't deserve to be the center of attention if something, God forbid, happened to you. The fact that you wouldn't get to be you for as long as possible is what scares me, and if it happens because of me..." Nick trailed off for a moment before continuing. "That's why I'm scared, for you, because I know what can happen. And I know what you're capable of, and anything that threatens you from having the longest and happiest life imaginable scares the living hell out of me."

"I know how you feel," Alex replied. "Every time you go to work, I think it's the last time I'm ever going to see you. Every time you call and say you have to work late or go to another scene, I think it's the last time I'm ever going to talk to you. Whenever Greg or Catherine call me, I think I'm going to answer only to have them tell me you were killed. And, yeah, I know what you're going to say. I can't live like that, I can't live in fear that something bad is going to happen. But honestly, what choice do I have?"

"You don't have a choice," Nick responded sadly. "You never have."

Alex finally opened his eyes and looked at his father. "When have you ever had a choice? And don't say with keeping me or not, because you didn't. I know you, and there was never any choice to be made. You were never capable of giving me up, to anyone. So when have you ever had a choice in anything that has happened to you?"

"I haven't," Nick said with a sigh. "But that doesn't mean you shouldn't either."

"I have a lot of choices," Alex argued. "I make choices every single day. I make the right ones - not to drink, do drugs, try to rob casinos - because of everything I've learned from you. I don't have a choice in whether or not I worry about you dying, but I do in almost everything else in my life. I can't control being scared about what's going to happen to you because I can't control any part of that."

Nick smiled slightly, much to Alex's confusion. "Grissom told me once that the most telling thing about a person is what scares them."

"So what does that tell you about me?"

"That you're afraid to be alone," Nick replied.

"Then so are you," Alex retorted. "If you're afraid to lose me, that means the same thing."

Nick nodded in agreement. "I never said it didn't. If we're scared of the same thing, doesn't it make sense that it's for the same reasons?"

Alex looked away again, but didn't close his eyes. "Yeah, it's pretty much the only thing that does make sense."

They fell quiet for a few moments before Nick decided to speak again. "It's not your fault this happened to you. I shouldn't have let you leave like that. I just knew that you were going to get madder and madder at me and I wanted you to be able to get away if that was what you wanted. If I had known what was going to happen, I would have never let you leave."

"I know," Alex said softly. "But you had no control over it, and neither did I. The only person who did have any control ended up dead, and I'm fine, so I guess it all worked out."

"You're not fine," Nick responded.

Alex closed his eyes again as he felt tears stinging them. "Yes, I am," he said. He tried to sound firm and honest, but his voice was weak and distant.

"No you're not," Nick argued. "You haven't been for a long time."

Alex opened his eyes, allowing the tears to fall down his cheeks. He looked over at his dad with a sad smile. "Neither have you."


	34. Chapter 34

This will be the final chapter of the story. I may do another later down the road involving Nick and Alex, but I'm not sure yet. Anyway, thanks to all of those who read and especially those who reviewed! Enjoy!

* * *

Alex's wounds healed slowly but surely, and in time, he was back to normal. The whole incident shifted both Stokes' views on almost everything. Thinking that he was going to have to go into the morgue and see his son's dead body gave Nick a whole new appreciation of his son; he stopped overworking himself at the lab and spent as much time as he could with Alex, who noticed the increased effort and reciprocated by not acting out in school and enjoying the things he did get to do with his dad rather than complaining about what he didn't have. A month had gone by and it they were both happier than they had been in a long time. Alex was out of school and would be graduating in two weeks, a bittersweet milestone in his life.

Nick was in the break room getting himself some coffee when Alex came in, followed closely by Catherine, who had a look on her face that Nick would have assumed would have been reserved for Lindsey; it was that angry, upset mother face.

"What did he do?" Nick asked upon their arrival.

"It's what he didn't do," Catherine said. "Tell him," she demanded of Alex, motioning to Nick with a piece of paper and envelope that she had in her hand.

"Okay, first of all," Alex said, "you need to relax. I was going to tell him, I swear."

"When? After you got home?"

"What the hell is going on?" Nick asked.

Alex decided to speak before Catherine could yell at him any more. "We had to do this speech contest for English class. It was a school wide thing for some scholarship, but they just used it as another assignment."

"Okay," Nick replied, not sure where this was going. "So what did he do to piss you off?" he asked Catherine.

"He won," Catherine replied.

Nick looked at Alex, who shrugged. "Yeah, I won."

"So why is that a bad thing?" Nick asked, still very confused.

Catherine glared at Alex, who sighed. "Because tomorrow night I'm giving the speech at this reception thing for civil service or something."

"Is that the thing we're supposed to go to?" Nick asked Catherine, who nodded.

"Yes, the same thing the mayor is going to be at. All of us are going now too, I already told DB and he's thrilled because he's the one introducing Alex, he just didn't know that it was him until I told him. It's a civil service banquet, so they wanted the supervisor of the crime lab to be a part of it."

"But why are you mad at Alex?" Nick asked.

"Because he wasn't going to tell anybody he won," Catherine replied. "I know you and Greg were both planning on blowing that banquet off and you would have because this knucklehead wasn't going to tell you he had won. Then I would have had to kill both of you."

She handed Nick the paper in her hand detailing the event and Alex's part in it, which was addressed to him.

"Did you open my mail?" he asked her, unable to hold back his small smile.

"Yes," Catherine replied simply.

"That's a felony," Alex interjected, trying to shift the focus of blame off of himself.

"Shut it," Catherine said, rolling her eyes. "You're going," she said, pointing at Nick, "and you're going too," she called over his shoulder to Greg and Hodges, who were across the hall in the trace lab.

Catherine turned and left the break room when she received a page, just as Hodges and Greg entered. "Where are we going?" Greg asked.

Nick shook his head slowly, still smiling. He handed the paper over to Greg, who read it as Hodges read it over his shoulder. "But I don't want to go to that thing," Hodges whined.

"Good, I don't want you going," Alex replied with a smirk.

"Well, now I am going, just to spite you," Hodges responded, then left the room to return to his lab.

Greg sighed. "Well, so much for going to the batting cages and go carts with Henry," he commented, more to himself than anyone else in the room.

Nick laughed and looked at Alex, who just shrugged again. "Sorry, I guess."

* * *

Catherine had corralled all of the people from the crime lab who had otherwise been invited to the banquet anyway to attend to support Alex. They were all in attendance, at tables in the middle of the room with the best view of the stage. Nick, Catherine, Greg, Morgan, Sara, Brass and DB were at one table while Henry, Mandy, Archie, Bobby, and Hodges were at the other. They had finished eating and were waiting for the mayor's speech on leadership and service to be over, which it was after thanking "the wonderful crime lab and police force that protect this fine city."

Then DB appeared at the podium, smiling widely, per usual. "It is with great pleasure that I introduce the next speaker to you. I haven't had the opportunity to know this young man for that long, but in the little time that I have known him, he has surely left his mark. He is an intelligent teenager with a knack for making people laugh and falling under his charm. So I present to you, ladies and gentleman, the winner of the Las Vegas school district speech contest, Alex Stokes."

After a round of applause, DB returned to his seat at the table, leaving Alex at the podium. "Thanks DB," he said with a smile. He paused briefly before he began his speech, without anything written in front of him. It was all by memory, by heart.

"I have to admit, this assignment wasn't all that hard for me to do. When Mr. Wiles assigned it, most of the kids in my class groaned and rolled their eyes, but I don't understand why. It's such an easy prompt, it requires almost no thought at all. I've known what I would write about even before it was assigned to me, before I knew I had to. I've known exactly how to give this speech since the day I arrived in Las Vegas ten years ago, at the crime lab downtown. That's what this speech is about, after all. Mr. Wiles wrote it on the board, and I was done with my speech before he had even finished writing. 'What does family mean to you?' The hardest part was figuring out where to begin. So I guess I'll start at the beginning."

Alex looked around the room as he spoke, but his eyes always landed back on the two tables in the middle more often than not. "For the first part of my life, family didn't exist to me. The one I had was so dysfunctional that no family at all would have been than that one. But that's not what I'm here to talk about, because the one I have now makes up for the first eight years. To me, family means acceptance. When I showed up at the crime lab ten years ago with nothing but a note in my hand and the clothes on my back, my dad took responsibility for me without thinking twice. How I came to be is a complicated situation, but that didn't matter to him. And it didn't matter to the people he worked with either, who accepted me as another Stokes terrorizing the lab with open arms. Family doesn't mean anything if they don't accept you, because if they don't accept you, they can't love you. I've had experiences with both sides, and trust me, acceptance is pivotal."

"To me, family means waking up well before I have to for school because they just got off shift and are at my house for breakfast. I am by no stretch of the imagination a morning person, but I know better than to turn down Catherine Willows' cooking. Family means being woken up by Greg Sanders jumping you on, because he doesn't understand why you didn't have breakfast started or why there was no Blue Hawaiian coffee waiting for him on the counter. Even though I could have gotten a few more hours of sleep before school, I never slept through any of these breakfasts. I wouldn't have missed them for anything."

"To me, family means growing up in a crime lab where the smartest and most interesting people I'll ever meet work. Not many people would think of a crime lab being a good place for a kid, but I can't think of a better one. Go ahead, ask me about ballistics. I can tell you everything Bobby Dawson taught me when I was supposed to be working on my math homework. Trace? Hodges covered that before I could spell trace. Archie taught me that computers do more than let me play games. This sounds like it only taught me how to be a CSI, but that's not true. It taught me about the most important people in my life by teaching me about what they do. I understand them because I understand their jobs."

Alex paused and smiled as he saw Catherine's eye tearing up as she put her arm around Nick's shoulders. "When I got up in front of my class to give this speech for the first time, someone in my class joked that it was going to be a short speech. I guess they thought it was funny because I only have one parent, and no brothers or sisters, and my dad's family lives out of state. It's true, I don't have the Hollywood style family with 2.5 kids, parents who were high school sweethearts, and a big white house with the picket fence. But I couldn't be happier about what I do have. Family isn't about how many people make it up, as long as the people in it care about one another."

"To me, family means more than just blood relation. Brothers are always there for one another and would do anything for each other. I don't call him my brother, I just call him Greg. Sisters are there to help you with girlfriend problems, and even though I haven't known her that long, it feels like I've known Morgan my whole life. And everybody has those goofball cousins that you love to hangout with, and mine just come in the form of a bunch of lab rats who are all really just a bunch of kids at heart. No family is complete without an older, wiser figure, and since Grissom is continent hoping, DB fills in quite nicely. Everyone needs a cool aunt to go to the movies with and who will let you store your legos in her locker when you're a kid, and keep letting you do that when you're a teenager; Sara fits that to a T. Then there's the protective uncle who tries to act like such a tough guy, but is really a teddy bear at heart. Jim Brass may scare the hell out of every suspect he comes across, and even me at times, but I also know that if I ever needed anything, he's the guy to go to."

Everyone at the two center tables looked around at each other, smiling widely at the heartwarming compliments that Alex had cleverly woven into his speech. They were all more than touched that he had included them into his speech on what family means to him.

"And then," Alex continued, pausing slightly for dramatic affect, "there's my dad. My real dad, but not just because I have half of his DNA. I was once reminded why he's my dad," he said, making eye contact with Greg, "but I could never forget because he exemplifies everything that the word family entails. Family means unconditional love. Which means that no matter how much trouble I get into at school or how many times I pick fights with him, my dad is still going to love me because no matter how many times he has to work later than he said he was going to or how many times he had to leave in the middle of a meal to go to a scene, I'm still going to love him. Because on that first day when I got here ten years ago, there was never any question about that. The only consistent thing in my life has been my dad, Nick, who made a split second decision ten years ago to put whatever plans he had had for himself on hold to take care of me."

"I've learned that family means making sacrifices. You have to give something to get something, and although you might not always like it, in the end it's always worth it. Family means doing for others what you would want them to do for you, which isn't always as easy as it sounds. But if it were easy, it wouldn't be worth fighting for."

"To me, family means Saturday afternoons at Lake Meade, racing jet skis and playing wiffle ball until the it gets too dark. It means movie nights and ordering in rather than going out because we're fine just where we are. Family means that where I am or what I'm doing doesn't matter as much as who I'm with. Being with family means being home because my home is wherever they are; whether that keeps me in Vegas, takes me back to Texas, out to Massachusetts or Florida or wherever, I don't care, because it's only home if they're there with me. Family means staying up all night playing card games and constantly arguing over whose turn it is to decide what's for dessert."

"I've learned a lot from my family, and I'll never forget how much fun I've had growing up around each and every one of them. From Grissom's chocolate covered grasshoppers to Greg's coffee to my go cart races with my dad, it's all been such an amazing experience and I can't wait for it to keep getting better as I get older. Family means always being a family, even if you can't always spend as much time as you'd like with one another, you still have that bond. It means that what hold us together in the love we have for each other is stronger than anything that could ever tear us apart because family, to me, means _everything_."

* * *

After the banquet, they had all gathered back at Alex and Nick's house for more drinks and quality time. They had all congratulated Alex over and over again, telling him how amazing and touching his speech was and thanking him for his inclusion of them. Catherine kept getting teary eyed at the thought of how grown up Alex was now.

"I remember when I first saw you, you were barely over four feet tall. Your eyes are still the same dark brown they were ten years ago, and you've got that same million dollar smile," she said, hugging Alex tightly.

"You've given me a lot to smile about," Alex replied, hugging her back.

After a couple hours, they all said their goodbyes and headed back to their own homes for the night. Alex went into his room to shower and change while Nick cleaned up, and when he returned he joined his dad on the couch to watch television. Nick was flipping through the channels aimlessly, not really interested in anything that was on. He tossed Alex the remote, and he too just kept flipping back and forth, not deciding on any one channel.

"That was a great speech you gave," Nick said as he reached over and ruffled Alex's hair affectionately.

Alex smiled. "It was an easy topic," he said modestly with a shrug.

"It's still nice to know that you've had a lot of positive experiences with good people here," Nick said, turning back to the television. "I get caught up with all of the bad stuff that happens and forget about the good sometimes."

"I have you to thank for that," Alex replied, and continued before his dad could argue. "I know you blame yourself for anything bad that has happened to me, even though I know that you never would have let it happen if you had actually had any control over it, but you didn't. And that's okay, because the things that you do have control over are what matter. You're not perfect, and neither am I, but I'm fine with that. I like my life, here, in Vegas, with you. I don't want it to be perfect, I wouldn't be who I am today if it had all been rainbows and butterflies."

"Rainbows and butterflies?" Nick asked, looking back at Alex with a smirk.

Alex smiled. "You know what I mean. There's been ups and downs, but despite it all, I've always know that in the end it's going to be okay because that's what you've always told me since I was eight-years-old, and I believe you. So if it's not okay, then it's not the end."

"This isn't the end," Nick responded, "it's the end of one part, starting another. Now you're going to go to college, then start a career, start your own family and-"

"Not start my own," Alex interjected, "add on to this one. This is my family, you're my family. I don't want my own, I just want more of it."


End file.
